Is anyone really, irrationally scared to get PG again?

I just O-ed a few days ago and this was the first cycle we were allowed to "try" after my D & E at 20w5d. I'm only 1-2 DPO, so there is no way of telling if I'm PG already, but I have this terrible fear that if I am PG, 1 I won't be ready to have a baby (that I'm too young, we don't have the money, etc) and 2 that something will go wrong to eff up this pregnancy too and my baby won't make it again.

It is such a concern to me, I can't stop thinking about it. My therapist keeps telling me I shouldn't think about it like that and 1 I am ready (we have been married 2 years, we both have good jobs and considerable savings) and 2 if something does go wrong, I won't be able to control it anyway, so why worry.

I'm sorry I'm babbling, I'm just so nervous about any future pregnancies, especially this close to my last one.

Re: Is anyone really, irrationally scared to get PG again?

Totally normal to feel this way. I just found out I was pregnant again after my m/c and have such crazy feelings and worries. I have a good feeling and am trying to stay positive thou. Stay strong

Re: Is anyone really, irrationally scared to get PG again?

Re: Is anyone really, irrationally scared to get PG again?

I absolutely feel this way!!! I'm so scared!!!!

Re: Is anyone really, irrationally scared to get PG again?

I am terrified. I think I'm more terrified b/c we don't have answers as to what caused our loss.

I'm still not totally healthy and we're in the middle of switching practice's so we're not TTC yet but I can't help but think what a basket case I'm going to be.

Feel free to FM if you need.

Re: Is anyone really, irrationally scared to get PG again?

Yes, I am very scared to get pregnant again. I have all these negative thoughts in my head. It's tough.

Re: Is anyone really, irrationally scared to get PG again?

At the very beginning of my last pregnancy (the triplets) when all I knew were the betas, I told my DH I just could not stand the thought of another loss. I showed up at the train station to pick him up and just couldn't stop crying, even though we got good news that day. I didn't realize how emotionally tainted I was from losing my 9 months before. I really thought I was ready to move forward and be positive.


Well.. I did move forward and think positively... and then my worst fears came true. I lost all 3 babies.

This totally isn't meant to scare you but just to show... you can't avoid what you can't predict. IF something does happen with a future pregnancy, you will pick yourself up and move on because you will have no choice. All you can do at this point is hope for the best because in MOST cases, everything is FINE!!

What helps me to move on after my losses is telling myself that if I don't, then all my losses were meaningless. I suffered for nothing. After all I have gone through, I HAVE to believe there will be a miracle in the end!! I know the same will happen for you, and you will appreciate it more the most people!!

Re: Is anyone really, irrationally scared to get PG again?

Yes. We waited 3 months per the doctor and then started trying again. The three months felt like forever and I couldn't wait to try again. Then when it was time I wasn't sure if I was ready. Every month I'd be sad that I wasn't pregnant but also super relieved. I would panic every 2 week wait and I was so scared to be pregnant again. After all of the testing it appears that I lost a normal baby with no explanation so that really scared me. I also had fears that I wouldn't be able to get pregnant again at all after my surgery. I was stressed and had all of these conflicting feelings.

Then a few tries later I got pregnant again. So scared. I had a sono a few days ago and saw a baby with a heartbeat but I'm still very nervous. Petrified is more like it. If I have a day where my nausea isn't so bad, a day like today, I start to worry. I try to stay relaxed but it is so hard.

I don't know what will be. I keep praying.

I hate that we all have to have these feelings :(

Re: Is anyone really, irrationally scared to get PG again?

I am terrified. At the same time though I feel like time can't move fast enough until when we are allowed to try again. Very conflicting.

I also dread the process and disappointment of trying - we had difficulty getting pregnant in the first place.

But I know more than ever how much I want a baby so that will get me through. I also know that I will be calling my doctor at least once a week though! I was scared enough the first time...

And now I feel robbed of being excited about being pregnant. I was cautiously excited the first time, but now? I will just be even more worried the whole time.

Re: Is anyone really, irrationally scared to get PG again?

I just wanted to say... for many of us i dont think its irrational either...

Re: Is anyone really, irrationally scared to get PG again?

I'm definitely scared but I agree that it isn't irrational.

Re: Is anyone really, irrationally scared to get PG again?

I'm terrified as well but after 2 miscarriages I can't imagine anyone in my shoes wouldn't be scared. I'm more scared of not being able to get PG again than being PG again.

Re: Is anyone really, irrationally scared to get PG again?

Posted by PennyCat



At the very beginning of my last pregnancy (the triplets) when all I knew were the betas, I told my DH I just could not stand the thought of another loss. I showed up at the train station to pick him up and just couldn't stop crying, even though we got good news that day. I didn't realize how emotionally tainted I was from losing my 9 months before. I really thought I was ready to move forward and be positive.


Well.. I did move forward and think positively... and then my worst fears came true. I lost all 3 babies.

This totally isn't meant to scare you but just to show... you can't avoid what you can't predict. IF something does happen with a future pregnancy, you will pick yourself up and move on because you will have no choice. All you can do at this point is hope for the best because in MOST cases, everything is FINE!!

What helps me to move on after my losses is telling myself that if I don't, then all my losses were meaningless. I suffered for nothing. After all I have gone through, I HAVE to believe there will be a miracle in the end!! I know the same will happen for you, and you will appreciate it more the most people!!

Re: Is anyone really, irrationally scared to get PG again?

I am pregnant again after a loss earlier this year and yes-I was absolutely terrified when I got my BFP. All I could think of was how horribly painful my loss was, and that if anything went wrong again I would lose it. I have cried before every Ob appointment. I am now 16 weeks, and I am just starting to breathe a little easier. All my screening tests look good, all of my thyroid tests are perfect (my hyperthyroid was the reason for my loss). I feel like I am just starting to bond to this baby and accept that I really AM having him in a few months. But I can tell you, for all the fear of having another loss and paranoia, I appreciate being pregnant now a million times more than I did before. I am cherishing every moment of it, knowing how truly lucky I am to be experiencing it all again.

Re: Is anyone really, irrationally scared to get PG again?

Posted by Megs4

I am terrified. At the same time though I feel like time can't move fast enough until when we are allowed to try again. Very conflicting.

I also dread the process and disappointment of trying - we had difficulty getting pregnant in the first place.

But I know more than ever how much I want a baby so that will get me through. I also know that I will be calling my doctor at least once a week though! I was scared enough the first time...

And now I feel robbed of being excited about being pregnant. I was cautiously excited the first time, but now? I will just be even more worried the whole time.