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Losing someone suddenly.

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PearlJamChick
No one sings like you anymore.

Member since 7/10

9264 total posts

Name:
Petticoated Swashbuckler

Losing someone suddenly.

My grandpa passed away a month ago. It was completely unexpected...basically on a Monday a few weeks ago, he was put under home hospice care. By Wednesday - two days later - he was brought to a hospice. I flew down to FL (where he was) on Friday morning and by Saturday evening, he had passed away. Chat Icon

I've (unfortunately) lost a few people in my life - especially in the past decade. However, all of those people were ill for a LONG time...to the point where once they passed, while it was still terribly sad, it was a relief that they were no longer suffering.

And I know - and keep telling myself - that wanting more time with my grandpa would've meant that he would've been suffering, and I should be grateful that he didn't suffer for nearly as long as other people in my life who have passed away.

But while I am experienced in the grieving process when a person passes away after a long illness (and their death is kind of...expected)...I am struggling with coping with the loss of my grandpa. I've never lost someone suddenly. I cry every single day...sometimes for a few minutes, sometimes for an hour.

I know that the loss is relatively new and it's normal to cry a LOT...hell, I cry once in awhile about other people that I miss. I don't see anything wrong with that, because you can't help how you feel.

But I just...I don't know...I guess I'm reaching out to see if anyone has any thoughts about grieving over a sudden loss like this. Maybe some kind of positive-thinking techniques, I don't know. I'm just kind of lost.
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Posted 9/8/11 10:58 AM
 
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BunnyWife
Insert Witty Comment Here

Member since 5/07

8274 total posts

Name:
BunnyWife

Re: Losing someone suddenly.

I'm so sorry....I lost my mom very suddenly 8 months ago.

I wish I had advice...it is shocking..and so so painful....but it does get better....allow yourself to grieve. The crying jags are totally normal and didn't stop for me until about 3 months ago.

I'm seeing a grief therapist which has been very helpful. I highly recommend talking to someone.

Please feel free to FM me if you ever need to talk.
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Posted 9/8/11 2:06 PM
 

Melissa1013
My sweet boy

Member since 1/08

1933 total posts

Name:
Melissa

Re: Losing someone suddenly.

My situation is different but it was very sudden.

I found that after it happened I was in a fog. I cried all the time.

It's been three and a half months and I still cry but it's not like it was. It's taken time (and still will) to reconcile it in my head. It shouldn't have been and I wish I could change it but I can't.

I wish I had some advice for you...all I can offer is knowing you're not alone feeling this way.

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Posted 9/8/11 2:07 PM
 

TreAnt427
-

Member since 8/06

8652 total posts

Name:
Tracy

Re: Losing someone suddenly.

I recently lost my dad suddenly.

I know how much it hurts. They are here one minute and gone the next. It can be very hard to comprehend.

I still cry a lot. Don't try to stop it, when you feel like crying, just cry. It's ok.

I'm very sorry for your loss. Chat Icon

Posted 9/9/11 11:44 AM
 

mrsh2010
To travel is to live.

Member since 7/09

1679 total posts

Name:
Celia

Re: Losing someone suddenly.

Kris-I am so sorry to hear about your grandpa. I havent loss anyone suddenly but I just wanted to give you tons of hugs Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 9/13/11 11:37 AM
 

MrsG823
Just call me Mommy.

Member since 1/11

5570 total posts

Name:
S

Re: Losing someone suddenly.

I lost my brother suddenly. Over two years later it is still very hard. I cried a lot in the beginning and sometimes I still cry out of no where. I found the book I Wasn't Ready to Say Goodbye: Surviving, Coping and Healing After the Death of a Loved One very helpful. I also find talking about my brother and remembering the good times helpful. I wish I had better advice Chat Icon

Posted 9/23/11 6:04 PM
 
 

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