question for you ladies

hello..

hope you do not mind me asking..i have tried to get my sister to post on here many times..i am asking a question for her

i have a almost 8 year old autistic niece named vanessa.this kid has been through the ringer between being dignosed over and over,seen by diff doctors,had bouts with seizures but overall was pretty happy considering the circumstances.

this past summer she became agressive..it seemed mostly when she wanted something..like if she needed a diaper change,was hungry,did not feel well..she would get mad..best way to put it..out of nowhere and would just bite,slap and almost throw a tantrum..for about 20 min..then she would cry..but it was like a sad cry,one you felt so bad for her bc whatever is bothering her she is trying to tell you and she cannot speak the words

we thought it maybe had to do with school because she loved school and maybe she missed it but she has continued since going back

my first question is anyone dealing with anything similar?any advice to give to my sister

here is the second part...vanessa is in a 8:1:1 class..she has had same teacher and para for 3 years,she has her own para bc the is a medical need,a "flight risk"(bc she will run away if not holding her hand)and can have self harm(bc she will put anything in her mouth and eat it)last year as the school ended her teacher suggested to my sister that vanessa maybe needs to find a 6:1:1 class as that is for autistic kids only.

my sister said she would look into it,she did over the summer and all the schools by us(we r in quuens)are full and the only options are far say in brooklyn(my sis could not go pick her up bc she has other kids in school and she does not not want her on a school bus)

so today when she picks up vanessa from school she talks with her para like she does every day(they r very friendly with one another) and vanessa had a bad day..biting the teacher and para,ripped off one of her necklaces and hit her also..there was a note sent home again suggesting vanessa may be better in an other school

she is not like this every day..this was her first "bad" day and i thought it was a bit early to send the note home,maybe the kid is still adjusting to sschool...also when vanessa came home my ssiter noticed she lost her front tooth..it was loose so it finally fell out,the didnt know in school..maybe she was in pain? who knows?

she also felt warm when she came home so maybe she is sick..maybe she just wan not in the mood today

i am so so sorry this is so long

what woudl you guys do? have a sit down with the teacher? keep calling the schools to see if they have a opening?leave her in the school? i do not think putting her in a school in another borough will ever be something my sister will do unless forced

any advice i would appreciate

if u got this far thank you so much for reading

for all the mommies and daddies on here

Re: question for you ladies

It sounds like this setting is not working out for her unfortunately. I would say give it time, but if she has had the same teachers for 3 years, and the are recognizing that a smaller class setting would be better, I would explore that option.

Why doesn't she want her on the bus? With all due respect, sometimes we have to step out of our comfort zone so that our children can thrive in a more suited environment.

Good luck!

Re: question for you ladies

Ditto, sounds like the program is not for her. I'd talk with CSE and see what other options there are. Don't be fooled there are other programs out there, you just have to get the facts. Maybe contact an advocate to seek advice. It sounds like she's unhappy which is usually why kids develop behaviors. Does she have a behavioral specialist at school? (she should) I would ask them for advice too. My son went 1 year to public school and they couldn't accomidate him so I found a charter school with a great autism program.