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frio85
LIF Adult
Member since 8/11 1164 total posts
Name:
Michele
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Feeling Defeated
Sorry I just need to vent:
I am just feeling defeated. I had my first IUI this month and just last night AF showed up. I don't know why this month is bothering me more than others. I just always think "What would have been" if I didn't have my miscarriage, I know it sounds crazy.
I almost feel like giving it a break for a few months but my husband says we have to keep trying.
Sorry ladies I just needed to vent
 
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Posted 10/9/12 12:29 PM  |
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LadyBug1209
Mommy to FOUR little men!
Member since 8/08 9655 total posts
Name:
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Re: Feeling Defeated
I know exactly how you feel...
I had my MC back in May and I really thought I would be pregnant again by now.
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| Posted 10/9/12 2:36 PM |
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JamieW
LIF Toddler
Member since 7/05 471 total posts
Name:
Jamie
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Feeling Defeated
I am in the same boat. I just keep thinking I would be X weeks now. I just feel frustrated and not in control of my body.
Vent away!!!! Everyone here has been there before. It will go away...you just need time. If you want a break I say take it. Why is your husband against a break?
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| Posted 10/9/12 2:50 PM |
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PennyCat
Just call me mommy :)
Member since 7/08 19084 total posts
Name:
Jib
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Re: Feeling Defeated
Posted by LadyBug1209
I know exactly how you feel...
I had my MC back in May and I really thought I would be pregnant again by now.
I lost my first baby over 2 years ago (August 13, 2010) and I am STUNNED that I am still in this mess 
I learned that making deadlines for yourself is just never a winning situation. As someone once said to me, it's like a race where you are the only participant- and that's really such a great analogy.
I often think of what life would be like had I not lost my baby boy over two years ago.... had I not stuck with the same doctor for nearly 3 years....... I think that last part is the part that really gets me. My first loss was unavoidable - but *I* am the one who made the decision to stick with the same doctor for years on end. I know how it is to think of the what ifs .. and trust me, nobody wins. All you can do is look ahead and hope that your time is near! 
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| Posted 10/9/12 4:56 PM |
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frio85
LIF Adult
Member since 8/11 1164 total posts
Name:
Michele
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Re: Feeling Defeated
Thanks ladies I am glad I am not crazy for feeling like this.
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| Posted 10/9/12 6:34 PM |
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frio85
LIF Adult
Member since 8/11 1164 total posts
Name:
Michele
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Re: Feeling Defeated
Posted by JamieW
I am in the same boat. I just keep thinking I would be X weeks now. I just feel frustrated and not in control of my body.
Vent away!!!! Everyone here has been there before. It will go away...you just need time. If you want a break I say take it. Why is your husband against a break?
I am not even sure if a break is really what I want??! I am so confused with mixed emotions right now, I just asked my husband and he said he would rather keep trying but whatever I wanted was ok.
What is waiting a few months going to get me?! I really want to have a baby and I already feel like I have been waiting forever!
I am always think about how far along I would have been if I didn't miscarry
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| Posted 10/9/12 6:41 PM |
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beachgirl
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 7967 total posts
Name:
sara
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Re: Feeling Defeated
I think everyone who has suffered a loss or losses always thinks about what might have been...what age your baby would be etc and you feel like you are in some sort of holding pattern. I know for me part of the healing process each time was actually getting pregnant so your DH might be right and you have to keep moving towards your goal no matter how painful the process is.
I wish you lots of luck and lots of hugs
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| Posted 10/9/12 8:01 PM |
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TaraVinny
my miracle coming October!!!
Member since 10/09 1049 total posts
Name:
Tara
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Re: Feeling Defeated
i'm sorry michelle.
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| Posted 10/9/12 8:44 PM |
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LadyBug1209
Mommy to FOUR little men!
Member since 8/08 9655 total posts
Name:
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Re: Feeling Defeated
We've had moments when we just wanted to take a break, but then I think to myself... What I want is another baby. The time is going to pass anyway, so if I keep going at least it will bring me my baby sooner. IDK, that's how I stop myself from giving up.
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| Posted 10/10/12 1:37 PM |
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medicjen
LIF Zygote
Member since 10/12 3 total posts
Name:
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Feeling Defeated
Know yourself and pay attention if you need a break. Even a month or two away from the constant thinking has helped me. The fertility drugs do a number on my already wounded psyche. We took a break this summer until I was ready to handle it and I am happy I did. I still have tough moments...sitting here on day 26 wondering yet again while I am thinking about that if I didn't miscarry the second time this year I would be giving birth this week...and if I didn't m/c the 1st time I would have a 2 month old. Know your limits but do what you need to do to stay sane...yoga, friends, journaling, etc. to get your mind in the game.
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| Posted 10/26/12 5:38 PM |
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