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Teacher out of line with my son-UPDATE
I have never felt so insulted and honestly the rudeness is beyond immature to me. None of u know me and have taken everything I said out of context. I am totally done with Lif. This is rediculous. Have fun insulting others when they were just trying to get some input from other moms. I don't need the advice of strangers anymore as this thread proved. Unreal.
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Posted 5/9/13 7:54 PM  |
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2BadSoSad
LIF Adult
Member since 8/12 6791 total posts
Name:
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Re: Teacher out of line with my son-UPDATE
Posted by 2girlsforme
Posted by Goobster
I read your update. Can I be honest? I give her a lot of credit for admitting she regretted saying it. Have you, as a mom, ever said something you regretted, to your child/ren? We all have things slip out of our mouths in anger or the heat of the moment. Teachers have very stressful jobs too, dealing with so many children isn't always easy. I am not saying it makes it right. But what about just having the teacher explain to your DC that she didn't mean to sound so harsh, but she was frustrated b/c she felt he didn't follow directions, etc?
Disciplinary action, I just don't agree with. She just said something in a manner she could have said differently or in private. But I don't think what she said was breaking any rules. JMO
ITA. I have had children in a well respected school district for the past 10 years and I am impressed by her candor. I would hope she follows up with a discussion/apology to your son. I don't think you can ask for much better than that.
Sometimes disappointment helps kids grow. Like it or not, this is a life lesson that will shape your son. As a mother, I would want the lesson to be people can make mistakes, but shoudl take responsibility for them and be allowed to move on.
I agree with this wholeheartedly. I don't think having this woman face professional consequences when she admitted she was wrong is necessary. I think in a case like this, an apology to your son would be acceptable. Have you never had something slip out, or not come out the way you meant? Have you ever yelled at your child when it was bc YOU were frustrated and not bc they deserved it? We all have, and when something like that happens, I think admitting you were wrong and apologizing to the person you hurt is enough. If you have already spoken to her dept head, what are you trying to accomplish, what consequence would you deem appropriate, that you hope to reach by calling the principal?
Message edited 5/9/2013 8:31:35 PM.
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| Posted 5/9/13 8:24 PM |
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Karen
Just chillin'!!
Member since 1/06 9690 total posts
Name:
Karen
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Re: Teacher out of line with my son-UPDATE
Posted by 2boys1girl4me
I have never felt so insulted and honestly the rudeness is beyond immature to me. None of u know me and have taken everything I said out of context. I am totally done with Lif. This is rediculous. Have fun insulting others when they were just trying to get some input from other moms. I don't need the advice of strangers anymore as this thread proved. Unreal.
You say in one post that you aren't out for blood, but in your update you call the teacher a "joke" and "disgusting" for an isolated incident that she has apologized for.
You spoke to her department superior, but feel the need to bring this single incident even further up the chain of command. Many of us simply posted that we did not agree with that.
I am not exactly sure why you feel insulted?
Message edited 5/9/2013 8:28:15 PM.
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| Posted 5/9/13 8:26 PM |
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StarsStripes
LIF Adult
Member since 12/12 1192 total posts
Name:
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Re: Teacher out of line with my son-UPDATE
Posted by 2boys1girl4me
I have never felt so insulted and honestly the rudeness is beyond immature to me. None of u know me and have taken everything I said out of context. I am totally done with Lif. This is rediculous. Have fun insulting others when they were just trying to get some input from other moms. I don't need the advice of strangers anymore as this thread proved. Unreal.
I re-read the entire post and I don't think anyone was insulting you, just giving honest opinions. Just because they do not agree with you does not mean they are insulting you.
With that said, the issue at hand is that many feel that since you spoke to the teacher and she admitted her mistake and apologized it is unclear what else you want out of the situation. Most likely, if anything, they will put a letter in her file and that will be it. It is up to you if you want to procede of course, but the consensus here is that most would not, that's all...you asked for the input and I do not think that it is really that ridiculous to expect others to have a different opinion than you. Good luck with whatever route you choose to go.
Message edited 5/9/2013 8:29:28 PM.
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| Posted 5/9/13 8:27 PM |
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Kitten1929
LIF Adult
Member since 1/13 6040 total posts
Name:
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Teacher out of line with my son-UPDATE
I can't believe you are getting so bent out of shape. Frankly it's uncalled for simply because I was curious and questioned what your intention was, and that your tone, as interpreted BY ME, was a but hostile and aggressive. If you think that is immature or rude then I don't know what to tell you. I'm sorry I even commented.
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| Posted 5/9/13 8:38 PM |
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2BadSoSad
LIF Adult
Member since 8/12 6791 total posts
Name:
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Re: Teacher out of line with my son-UPDATE
Posted by 2boys1girl4me
I have never felt so insulted and honestly the rudeness is beyond immature to me. None of u know me and have taken everything I said out of context. I am totally done with Lif. This is rediculous. Have fun insulting others when they were just trying to get some input from other moms. I don't need the advice of strangers anymore as this thread proved. Unreal.
Seriously?
I didn't read one (and I went back a reread them) insulting response. The input was we think a apology is acceptable and were curious as to what you wanted to happen to her by escalating it to the principal. Saying we disagree with the need to elevate it any further is not insulting you.
Message edited 5/9/2013 9:54:38 PM.
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| Posted 5/9/13 8:41 PM |
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Teacher out of line with my son-UPDATE
This thread has become nothing of what I was originally upset about. Unfortunately I am a sensitive person who was upset how someone treated my child. IRL I am literally the most passive aggressive person so some of the comments took me back a little. LIF is not for me as with all of us we are just strangers commenting on one little portion of our lives without even knowing each other. And to clarify she did not apologize she just admitted she said it. And not that it matters but she has a bad reputation amongst kids/parents. I would never try to get someone fired...ever. I was upset that's it. Have a good night. I will be calling my friends /family IRL to deal with things.
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| Posted 5/9/13 9:33 PM |
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Goobster
:)
Member since 5/07 27557 total posts
Name:
:)
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Re: Teacher out of line with my son-UPDATE
Posted by 2boys1girl4me
I have never felt so insulted and honestly the rudeness is beyond immature to me. None of u know me and have taken everything I said out of context. I am totally done with Lif. This is rediculous. Have fun insulting others when they were just trying to get some input from other moms. I don't need the advice of strangers anymore as this thread proved. Unreal.
Where has anyone insulted you? I think everyone gave you opinions, some of which you just don't like.
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| Posted 5/9/13 9:36 PM |
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Goobster
:)
Member since 5/07 27557 total posts
Name:
:)
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Re: Teacher out of line with my son-UPDATE
Posted by StarsStripes
Posted by 2boys1girl4me
I have never felt so insulted and honestly the rudeness is beyond immature to me. None of u know me and have taken everything I said out of context. I am totally done with Lif. This is rediculous. Have fun insulting others when they were just trying to get some input from other moms. I don't need the advice of strangers anymore as this thread proved. Unreal.
I re-read the entire post and I don't think anyone was insulting you, just giving honest opinions. Just because they do not agree with you does not mean they are insulting you.
With that said, the issue at hand is that many feel that since you spoke to the teacher and she admitted her mistake and apologized it is unclear what else you want out of the situation. Most likely, if anything, they will put a letter in her file and that will be it. It is up to you if you want to procede of course, but the consensus here is that most would not, that's all...you asked for the input and I do not think that it is really that ridiculous to expect others to have a different opinion than you. Good luck with whatever route you choose to go.
IMO, even a letter in her file for calling a project horrendous is ridiculous and over the top. Had she just given the failing grade, it would have indicated horrendous by a poor grade. Instead she said something about the quality of the work, and probably would have been better off just giving the poor grade. But I far from think what she said was so awful that she needs a letter in her file. Again, JMO.
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| Posted 5/9/13 9:38 PM |
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StarsStripes
LIF Adult
Member since 12/12 1192 total posts
Name:
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Re: Teacher out of line with my son-UPDATE
Posted by Goobster
Posted by StarsStripes
Posted by 2boys1girl4me
I have never felt so insulted and honestly the rudeness is beyond immature to me. None of u know me and have taken everything I said out of context. I am totally done with Lif. This is rediculous. Have fun insulting others when they were just trying to get some input from other moms. I don't need the advice of strangers anymore as this thread proved. Unreal.
I re-read the entire post and I don't think anyone was insulting you, just giving honest opinions. Just because they do not agree with you does not mean they are insulting you.
With that said, the issue at hand is that many feel that since you spoke to the teacher and she admitted her mistake and apologized it is unclear what else you want out of the situation. Most likely, if anything, they will put a letter in her file and that will be it. It is up to you if you want to procede of course, but the consensus here is that most would not, that's all...you asked for the input and I do not think that it is really that ridiculous to expect others to have a different opinion than you. Good luck with whatever route you choose to go.
IMO, even a letter in her file for calling a project horrendous is ridiculous and over the top. Had she just given the failing grade, it would have indicated horrendous by a poor grade. Instead she said something about the quality of the work, and probably would have been better off just giving the poor grade. But I far from think what she said was so awful that she needs a letter in her file. Again, JMO.
I totally agree with you, I was just saying that a letter is perhaps the worst that would happen...
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| Posted 5/9/13 9:47 PM |
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
Name:
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Re: Teacher out of line with my son-UPDATE
Posted by 2boys1girl4me
This thread has become nothing of what I was originally upset about. Unfortunately I am a sensitive person who was upset how someone treated my child. IRL I am literally the most passive aggressive person so some of the comments took me back a little. LIF is not for me as with all of us we are just strangers commenting on one little portion of our lives without even knowing each other. And to clarify she did not apologize she just admitted she said it. And not that it matters but she has a bad reputation amongst kids/parents. I would never try to get someone fired...ever. I was upset that's it. Have a good night. I will be calling my friends /family IRL to deal with things.
As someone who has had to fire people all of the time & who has helped someone get a person fired from their job when they broke some severe laws, I can be both aggressive-aggressive AND passive-agressive.
No one is you shouldn't feel bad for your son. I do feel bad for him. I think the teacher was a complete ass to him. If it's an ongoing problem, absolutely kick it up the chain of command. If this is a one-time incident, you can chalk it up to a crappy day for the teacher, who still owes your son an apology. It sucks to have your kid's feelings hurt. We all have been there. We all wanted to kick the little crap or the frenemy on the playground for hurting our kids. We all get it.
I'm not seeing the insults that you are seeing on this thread. If thought you had asked what would we do in the thread. If this was a thread where we were also supposed to agree with you, not give advice or just through out hugs, I misread. We are here to support each other - you included. It doesn't mean we have to agree on everything.
Again, I am sorry that your son's feelings got hurt - and I am sorry yours did too. I know that wasn't my intent & I don't think it was many of the others on this board.
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| Posted 5/9/13 10:25 PM |
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Teacher out of line with my son-UPDATE
Thank u. It was mainly 2 people out of the whole thread that took me back. I appreciate the others input.
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| Posted 5/9/13 10:33 PM |
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dpli
Daylight savings :)
Member since 5/05 13973 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: Teacher out of line with my son-UPDATE
I didn't see your update, since you deleted it, but I can get the gist of it by the responses.
Once when I was teaching, one of my students drove me crazy on a regular basis. She was a good kid, but sort of the class clown. One day, I was having a particularly bad day and insulted her in front of the class, to just get her to quiet down. It worked, but it also humiliated her. I felt terribly about it afterwards and kept her after class the next day to apologize. Yes, teachers are human and they have bad days. They may say things that are inappropriate or disrespectful at times. It's how she handles it after she is spoken to about it that matters, IMO. If she apologized to your son, I would let it go. If she just admitted it but did not talk to HIM about it afterwards, I would also want to talk to the Department Head. Not because I am out for blood, not because I want a letter in her file, but because someone needs to talk to her about how she can better communicate with her students.
Sorry this has been so stressful for you.
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| Posted 5/10/13 10:39 AM |
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lvdolphins
My Loves!
Member since 5/05 46292 total posts
Name:
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Re: Teacher out of line with my son-UPDATE
I didn't see the update, but, just read your post above that she did NOT apologize.
That would irk me too.
I would never ever want anyone fired, she knows she was wrong. She definitely could have thrown in an "Im sorry".
I don't care if your kid is 4 or 14.
She's a teacher working with kids.
She needs to be a little more compassionate about her words.
I'm sorry you're going through this. I would let it go for now, but, if it happens again, I'd definitely be making note of it!
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| Posted 5/10/13 11:14 AM |
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adeline27
LIF Adult
Member since 5/06 3121 total posts
Name:
Angela
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Re: Teacher out of line with my son-UPDATE
You did the right thing and don't take what others have to say on here to heart. Kids are dealing with low self esteem and bullying at 14 having a teacher knock their efforts doesn't help. This obviously upset your son enough to tell you. This should have been brought up to the teachers superior. If you're going to be an asshole teacher than be prepared for the moms that actually give a shit on how their kids are treated in school. I remember in school how differently my teachers would be when their superior was evaluating them way back in the room. Oh how differently we were spoken to and tought that day.
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| Posted 5/10/13 10:49 PM |
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Jbon630
LIF Adult
Member since 12/11 1340 total posts
Name:
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Re: Teacher out of line with my son-UPDATE
Posted by adeline27
You did the right thing and don't take what others have to say on here to heart. Kids are dealing with low self esteem and bullying at 14 having a teacher knock their efforts doesn't help. This obviously upset your son enough to tell you. This should have been brought up to the teachers superior. If you're going to be an asshole teacher than be prepared for the moms that actually give a shit on how their kids are treated in school. I remember in school how differently my teachers would be when their superior was evaluating them way back in the room. Oh how differently we were spoken to and tought that day.
 of course your teachers acted differently when they were getting observed. Have you ever been observed? Has the CEO of your company ever been watching you directly for 40 minutes? You don't act any differently?
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| Posted 5/11/13 1:43 PM |
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adeline27
LIF Adult
Member since 5/06 3121 total posts
Name:
Angela
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Re: Teacher out of line with my son-UPDATE
Posted by Jbon630
Posted by adeline27
You did the right thing and don't take what others have to say on here to heart. Kids are dealing with low self esteem and bullying at 14 having a teacher knock their efforts doesn't help. This obviously upset your son enough to tell you. This should have been brought up to the teachers superior. If you're going to be an asshole teacher than be prepared for the moms that actually give a shit on how their kids are treated in school. I remember in school how differently my teachers would be when their superior was evaluating them way back in the room. Oh how differently we were spoken to and tought that day.
of course your teachers acted differently when they were getting observed. Have you ever been observed? Has the CEO of your company ever been watching you directly for 40 minutes? You don't act any differently?
TEACHERS should ALWAYS be encouraging to children. If you're burnt out, need a coffee break or having a bad day don't take it out on the kids. Do you not get that?
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| Posted 5/11/13 2:36 PM |
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