5 year old having trouble listening in school

Hi,

I wrote about a problem my 5-year-old daughter had earlier this year. The teacher said she wasn't listening and was distracted, but it was mainly because she was finishing her work early and was bored. The teacher let her "help" with other things and the problem seemed to be mainly solved. We touched on moving her up a grade but decided not to pursue that. She is ahead in many areas, but not all.

Recently (the last month or so), she has been having issues with listening again. The teacher asked me to come in and talk to her about my daughter. Basically, when she is interested in something she listens; when she is not she just thinks about what she likes. She is not being disruptive in any way but misses directions because she is so lost in thought. Not listening is not affecting her schoolwork in anyway; in a recent assessment of math, reading, science and history she got 100% of the first two and one wrong on the latter two.

I brought up the possibility of ADD (the inattentive manifestation, as she is active but not hyperactive), which the teacher thought was a possibility but that it is more likely a maturity issue. Since then, my daughter has been receiving 1-2 "yellows" or "reds" a week, and we are now doing a daily behavior chart with her teacher.

Sorry this is so long, but I'm not sure what to do. We have always encouraged deep thinking and respectful questioning, but she needs to be able to listen in school. I am also wondering if the teacher (who is very young and only in her second year of teaching) might be a factor. I get the feeling that she is frustrated by my daughter, although I could be wrong. I am not blaming the teacher; just wondering if it could be a factor.

Well, thanks for reading if you made it through. Suggestions are welcome!

5 year old having trouble listening in school

I think that since it is the nearing the end of the school year I would continue what you are doing with her, behavior charts etc, and then see how she does next year. It sounds to me that she is bored and not challenged enough, not ADD. She is still only 5 and it is not easy to capture a 5 year olds attention for that long. She told you she only pays attention when interested. Maybe the teacher can arrange a secret signal with her to get her back on track when she is daydreaming, that way it doesn't manifest itself into
yellow/red cards. Good luck!

Re: 5 year old having trouble listening in school

I'm surprised the teacher is being so hard on her when she's not disruptive. She should focus on strategies to keep her attention or get her to focus instead of punishing her. She's only 5.

DS is in 1st grade and is one of the youngest kids in his class. He has had some attention issues both years, but it's partly due to boredom and partly due to maturity. His K teacher had daily behavior charts for everyone and he never received a yellow or red. Both of his teachers have worked on keeping him focused, not on punishing him. When he's interested, he's much more focused. When he's not, he'll stare off and think about other stuff. His teachers have also said he'll grow out of this as he matures, and things have already gotten better since earlier in the school year.

I don't have much advice, but I don't think the teacher is handling things in the best way for a 5 year old. They typically don't have a large attention span. She should engage your DD and give gentle reminders. She may respond better to that than a punishment.

Re: 5 year old having trouble listening in school

This is the problem I'm having with my DS in school too. The teacher is telling me the same things.

To be honest, I'm not too concerned with it. They're 5. The amount of work & quite time that is expected for a 5 year old is insanity.

Especially during the winter months when they were not having recess outside to run off the energy.

I agree with finishing out the remainder of the school year with what you've been doing. You may find that in the first grade she will have a better handle of sitting still, focusing & listening.

Re: 5 year old having trouble listening in school

I agree with the other ladies.

And I also wouldn't be so quick to jump on the ADD bandwagon.

DS is in K and a year ago he would've fit the mold perfectly.

It's amazing what a year makes.

We also had him evaluated, and the doctor admitted they fudged the diagnosis (ADD) in order for DS to get services if needed.

5 year old having trouble listening in school

My daughter is similar. She has gotten a couple of yellows and a red once. She definitely has listening issues because she is always so focused on what everyone else is doing. I was really concerned about ADD/ADHD, but I am really beginning to think it's a maturity thing. You can PM me if you want to chat, our daughters sound similar!