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Do you think the US should allow same-sex couples to get married?

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CookiePuss
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Re: Do you think the US should allow same-sex couples to get married?

Posted by Shellyesq

Most religions prohibit gay marriage. But, like every religion, there are some sects of Christianity, Judaism and (maybe) Muslim that are more liberal about this. But to my knowledge, there is no religion that expressly permits gay marriage.




There are churches that are very supportive of gay couples. When I worked in foster care, I had a gay couple who were very involved in their church and extremely religious. They were two of the best foster parents I ever had the pleasure of working with.

Posted 2/3/06 11:07 AM
 
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JennChris
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Re: Do you think the US should allow same-sex couples to get married?

Posted by DebG

Posted by JennChris

Posted by Kelly

Posted by BabyAvocado

Posted by JennChris

Well whatever it should be called, they should still have the same rights as an other "couple".... our friends that have the twins had to go through the "adoption" process just so that they both have the same rights with their children, that doesn't seem fair!



I think it's fine and NECESSARY that gay couples have to go through an adoption process for one parent or both (depending on how the child was "obtained", for lack of a better word). If the child is not 100% biologically theirs (which obviously it can't be), then that child needs to be adopted properly. There has to be a history because of genetic health concerns. I don't think that just because you are a married gay couple you get to just pluck your children from wherever and declare them yours without a formal adoption process. Heterosexual couples who conceive their children biologically have the right to not go through an adoption process. If you cannot conceive your children biologically, heterosexual or NOT, you have to go through an adoption process. I'm sorry, but IMO that's a right they just don't have because they are gay.



I agree.


Just so you have the complete information... the couple was together for quite a few years before conceiving their child... and it was completely biologically the baby of one of the women... they were together through the whole conception and pregnancy time and live their lives like any other couple/family would.... IMO they shouldn't have to go through the adoption process, and the children were not "plucked"!!



both had to go thru adoption or just one?
If it was just one then its no different then a step mother or father adoption thier spouses child.


It was a considered a step-parent adoption.. the same as my DH had to go through with my son.... I was saying that they wouldn't have had to go through the process they had to go through if the state recognized their union...

Posted 2/3/06 11:07 AM
 

june262004
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Re: Do you think the US should allow same-sex couples to get married?

Posted by MrsJ

Posted by june262004

Posted by DebG

Posted by Princessmaris

Posted by Shellyesq

Posted by Princessmaris

Less... no??

But from a religious stand point you arent married.... but if you dont believe in religion than that shouldnt matter to you....



So if a gay couple doesn't care about what YOUR religion says, then it doesn't matter.

No one here is asking the church to change thier laws. We are talking about the state!




Im undecided on how to answer this....

Yes.... and no...


The only reason I feel no...is because I feel that this country was built on the guidelines of the bible/religion faith..... and this goes against it...


But again if you dont care what religion says that what does it matter...



We are talking about STATE laws NOT religious laws!
TWO VERY DIFFERENT things. PLSU most people pick and choose which religious laws they feel are relevent anyway.



Exactly... the catholic religion says no sex until marriage.. People do it. Catholic people do it and get pregnant all the time....



catholic religion also teaches that no one should be using birth control...so anyone on the pill, using condoms, even pulling out is going against that religion




Exactly. Deb said that Chat Icon

Posted 2/3/06 11:07 AM
 

oneday
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Re: Do you think the US should allow same-sex couples to get married?

Posted by DebG

Posted by JennChris

Posted by Kelly

Posted by BabyAvocado

Posted by JennChris

Well whatever it should be called, they should still have the same rights as an other "couple".... our friends that have the twins had to go through the "adoption" process just so that they both have the same rights with their children, that doesn't seem fair!



I think it's fine and NECESSARY that gay couples have to go through an adoption process for one parent or both (depending on how the child was "obtained", for lack of a better word). If the child is not 100% biologically theirs (which obviously it can't be), then that child needs to be adopted properly. There has to be a history because of genetic health concerns. I don't think that just because you are a married gay couple you get to just pluck your children from wherever and declare them yours without a formal adoption process. Heterosexual couples who conceive their children biologically have the right to not go through an adoption process. If you cannot conceive your children biologically, heterosexual or NOT, you have to go through an adoption process. I'm sorry, but IMO that's a right they just don't have because they are gay.



I agree.


Just so you have the complete information... the couple was together for quite a few years before conceiving their child... and it was completely biologically the baby of one of the women... they were together through the whole conception and pregnancy time and live their lives like any other couple/family would.... IMO they shouldn't have to go through the adoption process, and the children were not "plucked"!!



both had to go thru adoption or just one?
If it was just one then its no different then a step mother or father adoption thier spouses child.



Just out of curiosity though, what about a couple who say, the man is sterile so the woman is artificicially inseminated with a sperm donors sperm. Would the husband have to "adopt" the child?

Posted 2/3/06 11:09 AM
 

dpli
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D

Re: Do you think the US should allow same-sex couples to get married?

Posted by JennChris

Just so you have the complete information... the couple was together for quite a few years before conceiving their child... and it was completely biologically the baby of one of the women... they were together through the whole conception and pregnancy time and live their lives like any other couple/family would.... IMO they shouldn't have to go through the adoption process, and the children were not "plucked"!!



But I think the point that was being made is that if the child is not the biological child of one parent, they need to adopt the child to have rights.

If I had a one year old child and there was no father and I remarried, I don't think my spouse would have any custodial rights to the child unless he adopted the child, regardless of how long we are together.

The larger problem, IMO is that in some states, both parents cannot adopt a child if they are both gay. So if something happens to one of them, the child could be taken away from the non-adoptive parent.

ETA: you already responded... these threads move SOO fast Chat Icon

Message edited 2/3/2006 11:12:06 AM.

Posted 2/3/06 11:09 AM
 

BabyAvocado
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Re: Do you think the US should allow same-sex couples to get married?

Posted by JennChris

Just so you have the complete information... the couple was together for quite a few years before conceiving their child... and it was completely biologically the baby of one of the women... they were together through the whole conception and pregnancy time and live their lives like any other couple/family would.... IMO they shouldn't have to go through the adoption process, and the children were not "plucked"!!



Like I said, one or both depending on how the child was "obtained" (for lack of a better word - I know there are many different ways that a child can come into a gay union). That means that at least ONE of them has to go through the adoption process. Did they BOTH have to go through the adoption process?

It's just like if I had an affair and conceived a child with another man. That child is not biologically my husband's baby so HE would have to adopt the baby (if we were to stay together after something like that Chat Iconetc).

Posted 2/3/06 11:09 AM
 

Shorty
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really

Re: Do you think the US should allow same-sex couples to get married?

What about homosexuality in general?! Back in the day of Oscar Wilde, or even Socrates! There are parts of Plato's work that recount numerous occasions of Socrates lusting over and having a relationship with a young man/boy. And it was OK then! How does it make sense that homosexuality was more widely accepted HUNDREDS OF YEARS AGO, but people have a problem with it NOW?!?!?

I don't understand.

Message edited 2/3/2006 11:11:12 AM.

Posted 2/3/06 11:09 AM
 

Boobobunny
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Dannielle

Re: Do you think the US should allow same-sex couples to get married?

I am Catholic...and the one thing I always remembered from Religious Instructions...was that God made all people and we are all his children even though we are all very different...he LOVES us all just the same.

So that being said...I don't think that it really matters is a person is Gay or not...GOD loves you...and you should be welcomed into his Church and be able to recieve the same sacraments as everyone else.

Unfortunatly the Catholic Church conradicts itself on this matter. True the bible does depict stories in which God did not approve of men and women's Homesexual relationships...but keep in the mind that when the scriptures were written...by Man, it was at a time before the Earth was so widley populated...and the only way a Man could pass down his fortunes and wealth was to pass it down to his own children...which he could not have at that time unless he procreated with a Woman.

Also there are many things in the bible that have been interperted to mean one thing in one sect of Christianity...and yet the same scripture is interperted very differently in another sect of Christianity.


ETA...oh and why does it matter what any religous organization belief is on the matter of Homosexual marriages? We live in the US....Seperation of Church and State!!!!!!!

Message edited 2/3/2006 11:46:09 AM.

Posted 2/3/06 11:10 AM
 

MrsS2005
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B

Re: Do you think the US should allow same-sex couples to get married?

Posted by Redhead

Posted by calendargrl

Posted by Redhead

MY personl view of marriage is between 2 consenting ADULTS
ETA...and once we start allowing more than that...we are making a mockery of marraige IMO



But what if the 2 consenting adults are male. That should be okay.

To me, in many cases marriages are in some cases a mockery.


like i said...i have no problem with gay marriages...
but rather the possible ramifications


Bigamy/polygamy is illegal. I don't think allowing same-sex marriages will change the law on bigamy and polygamy. If the law is narrowly tailored and defines marriage as a union between two consenting adults, it shouldn't open the door to anything but same-sex marriage.

Posted 2/3/06 11:10 AM
 

Shelly
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Re: Do you think the US should allow same-sex couples to get married?

Posted by Shorty

What about homosexuality in general?! Back in the day of Oscar Wilde, or even Socrates! There are parts of Plato's work that recount numerous occasions of Socrates lusting over and having a relationship with a young man/boy. And it was OK then! How does it make sense that homosexuality was more widely accepted HUNDREDS OF YEARS AGO, but people have a problem with it NOW?!?!?

I don't understand.



Puritanitcal revolution. These things (like premarital sex, adultery, etc...) have ALWAYS been done. They were just talked about less.

Posted 2/3/06 11:13 AM
 

DebG
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Re: Do you think the US should allow same-sex couples to get married?

Posted by JennChris
It was a considered a step-parent adoption.. the same as my DH had to go through with my son.... I was saying that they wouldn't have had to go through the process they had to go through if the state recognized their union...



I'm sorry I am confused...you are saying that they had to go through the same thing that your DH did...does that mean the state did not recognize your union?

Or are you saying the process was identical for your DH and for the otehr couple?

I'm sorry..I really am confused.

Posted 2/3/06 11:13 AM
 

Kelly
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This is it

Re: Do you think the US should allow same-sex couples to get married?

Posted by DebG

Posted by JennChris
It was a considered a step-parent adoption.. the same as my DH had to go through with my son.... I was saying that they wouldn't have had to go through the process they had to go through if the state recognized their union...



I'm sorry I am confused...you are saying that they had to go through the same thing that your DH did...does that mean the state did not recognize your union?

Or are you saying the process was identical for your DH and for the otehr couple?

I'm sorry..I really am confused.



Me too. I seriously don't mean to be rude.

Posted 2/3/06 11:16 AM
 

Shorty
.

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really

Re: Do you think the US should allow same-sex couples to get married?

Posted by Shellyesq

Posted by Shorty

What about homosexuality in general?! Back in the day of Oscar Wilde, or even Socrates! There are parts of Plato's work that recount numerous occasions of Socrates lusting over and having a relationship with a young man/boy. And it was OK then! How does it make sense that homosexuality was more widely accepted HUNDREDS OF YEARS AGO, but people have a problem with it NOW?!?!?

I don't understand.



Puritanitcal revolution. These things (like premarital sex, adultery, etc...) have ALWAYS been done. They were just talked about less.



well I think it's just STUPID, for lack of a better word.

Posted 2/3/06 11:17 AM
 

nrthshgrl
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Re: Do you think the US should allow same-sex couples to get married?

Posted by oneday
Just out of curiosity though, what about a couple who say, the man is sterile so the woman is artificially inseminated with a sperm donors sperm. Would the husband have to "adopt" the child?



Under law a baby conceived during a marriage is assumed to be the husband's. If a surrogate is used than adoption proceedings are necessary

Posted 2/3/06 11:17 AM
 

Shelly
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Re: Do you think the US should allow same-sex couples to get married?

Posted by Shorty

Posted by Shellyesq

Posted by Shorty

What about homosexuality in general?! Back in the day of Oscar Wilde, or even Socrates! There are parts of Plato's work that recount numerous occasions of Socrates lusting over and having a relationship with a young man/boy. And it was OK then! How does it make sense that homosexuality was more widely accepted HUNDREDS OF YEARS AGO, but people have a problem with it NOW?!?!?

I don't understand.



Puritanitcal revolution. These things (like premarital sex, adultery, etc...) have ALWAYS been done. They were just talked about less.



well I think it's just STUPID, for lack of a better word.



I agree. I don't care about who is sleeping with whom- as long as its not my DH!

Posted 2/3/06 11:18 AM
 

Shorty
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really

Re: Do you think the US should allow same-sex couples to get married?

Posted by Shellyesq

Posted by Shorty

Posted by Shellyesq

Posted by Shorty

What about homosexuality in general?! Back in the day of Oscar Wilde, or even Socrates! There are parts of Plato's work that recount numerous occasions of Socrates lusting over and having a relationship with a young man/boy. And it was OK then! How does it make sense that homosexuality was more widely accepted HUNDREDS OF YEARS AGO, but people have a problem with it NOW?!?!?

I don't understand.



Puritanitcal revolution. These things (like premarital sex, adultery, etc...) have ALWAYS been done. They were just talked about less.



well I think it's just STUPID, for lack of a better word.



I agree. I don't care about who is sleeping with whom- as long as its not my DH!



Chat Icon WORD!

Posted 2/3/06 11:19 AM
 

oneday
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Re: Do you think the US should allow same-sex couples to get married?

Posted by nrthshgrl

Posted by oneday
Just out of curiosity though, what about a couple who say, the man is sterile so the woman is artificially inseminated with a sperm donors sperm. Would the husband have to "adopt" the child?



Under law a baby conceived during a marriage is assumed to be the husband's. If a surrogate is used than adoption proceedings are necessary



So, with no serrogate (assume the woman is able to carry the baby) it is automatically the "husband's child" and no adoption is necessary? Right? Even though techinally the baby wasn't conceived by both of them?

Posted 2/3/06 11:20 AM
 

usuk2004
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Re: Do you think the US should allow same-sex couples to get married?

Posted by Kelly

Posted by DebG

Posted by JennChris
It was a considered a step-parent adoption.. the same as my DH had to go through with my son.... I was saying that they wouldn't have had to go through the process they had to go through if the state recognized their union...



I'm sorry I am confused...you are saying that they had to go through the same thing that your DH did...does that mean the state did not recognize your union?

Or are you saying the process was identical for your DH and for the otehr couple?

I'm sorry..I really am confused.



Me too. I seriously don't mean to be rude.



I think she means her son is not her DH's biological child, the same way the woman who didn't carry the baby in the same sex relationship is not considered the biological mother.

Posted 2/3/06 11:22 AM
 

JennChris
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Re: Do you think the US should allow same-sex couples to get married?

Posted by DebG

Posted by JennChris
It was a considered a step-parent adoption.. the same as my DH had to go through with my son.... I was saying that they wouldn't have had to go through the process they had to go through if the state recognized their union...



I'm sorry I am confused...you are saying that they had to go through the same thing that your DH did...does that mean the state did not recognize your union?

Or are you saying the process was identical for your DH and for the otehr couple?

I'm sorry..I really am confused.


Sorry... my DH had to go through the step-parent adoption process (which includes, background checks, fingerprinting, homestudy, and months of doing tons of paperwork) my son is not my DH's, he is from my first marriage, and my DH has been in his life since he was a year old.... that adoption process I understand and agree with.... however my friends had to go through the same process we had to even though they had been together since before the conception of their children, and because the state does not recognize their "union", let's say... one of them had to go through the adoption also...Would a "regular" married couple have to go through this?

Posted 2/3/06 11:22 AM
 

Kelly
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Re: Do you think the US should allow same-sex couples to get married?

Posted by JennChris



Sorry... my DH had to go through the step-parent adoption process (which includes, background checks, fingerprinting, homestudy, and months of doing tons of paperwork) my son is not my DH's, he is from my first marriage, and my DH has been in his life since he was a year old.... that adoption process I understand and agree with.... however my friends had to go through the same process we had to even though they had been together since before the conception of their children, and because the state does not recognize their "union", let's say... one of them had to go through the adoption also...Would a "regular" married couple have to go through this?


I'm sorry, but I have to disagree with you there. I seriously think this process is in the childs best interest.

Posted 2/3/06 11:24 AM
 

CookiePuss
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Re: Do you think the US should allow same-sex couples to get married?

Posted by JennChris

Posted by DebG

Posted by JennChris
It was a considered a step-parent adoption.. the same as my DH had to go through with my son.... I was saying that they wouldn't have had to go through the process they had to go through if the state recognized their union...



I'm sorry I am confused...you are saying that they had to go through the same thing that your DH did...does that mean the state did not recognize your union?

Or are you saying the process was identical for your DH and for the otehr couple?

I'm sorry..I really am confused.


Sorry... my DH had to go through the step-parent adoption process (which includes, background checks, fingerprinting, homestudy, and months of doing tons of paperwork) my son is not my DH's, he is from my first marriage, and my DH has been in his life since he was a year old.... that adoption process I understand and agree with.... however my friends had to go through the same process we had to even though they had been together since before the conception of their children, and because the state does not recognize their "union", let's say... one of them had to go through the adoption also...Would a "regular" married couple have to go through this?



I think the adoption process is very important until the marriage of same sex individuals is recognized and protected by the same laws as a married couple is protected. Without the adoption process, the parent without a biological connection could be cut out of the child's life should something happen between the two of them.

Once same sex marriage is protected by laws just as man/woman marriages are, no, I think the child should be a product of that marriage without the adoption process and both parents receive the same parental rights.

Posted 2/3/06 11:27 AM
 

neenie

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Re: Do you think the US should allow same-sex couples to get married?

yes.

live and let live.

Posted 2/3/06 11:28 AM
 

LadyMaravilla
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Re: Do you think the US should allow same-sex couples to get married?

i think we are side tracking w/ religion beliefs vs. state laws. We are going by the state laws here

Message edited 2/3/2006 11:34:23 AM.

Posted 2/3/06 11:30 AM
 

JennChris
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Re: Do you think the US should allow same-sex couples to get married?

Posted by shamrock12472

Posted by JennChris

Posted by DebG

Posted by JennChris
It was a considered a step-parent adoption.. the same as my DH had to go through with my son.... I was saying that they wouldn't have had to go through the process they had to go through if the state recognized their union...



I'm sorry I am confused...you are saying that they had to go through the same thing that your DH did...does that mean the state did not recognize your union?

Or are you saying the process was identical for your DH and for the otehr couple?

I'm sorry..I really am confused.


Sorry... my DH had to go through the step-parent adoption process (which includes, background checks, fingerprinting, homestudy, and months of doing tons of paperwork) my son is not my DH's, he is from my first marriage, and my DH has been in his life since he was a year old.... that adoption process I understand and agree with.... however my friends had to go through the same process we had to even though they had been together since before the conception of their children, and because the state does not recognize their "union", let's say... one of them had to go through the adoption also...Would a "regular" married couple have to go through this?



I think the adoption process is very important until the marriage of same sex individuals is recognized and protected by the same laws as a married couple is protected. Without the adoption process, the parent without a biological connection could be cut out of the child's life should something happen between the two of them.

Once same sex marriage is protected by laws just as man/woman marriages are, no, I think the child should be a product of that marriage without the adoption process and both parents receive the same parental rights.


Agreed!

Posted 2/3/06 11:33 AM
 

FelAndJon
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Re: Do you think the US should allow same-sex couples to get married?

Posted by eroxgirl

Posted by Kelly

Is the Catholic religion the only religion that is against this?

I've seen a lot of people preface their statements with: "I'm a Catholic, but I'm still in favor..."

Can two Jewish men walk into a temple in (somewhere other than NY obviously) and get married?

What about two Muslim women?




Homosexuality is against the Muslim religion as well...I'm not certain but I believe it's one of the worst possible offenses. I've heard that some reform jewish rabbis will perform a gay marriage but I don't believe its widely accepted in the Jewish religion. I'm sure there's someone else here that knows more than I do about that..



My rabbi married my DH and I in a temple. I grew up reformed so the rabbi marrying us was reformed. I got married in a Conservative (almost orthodox) temple so the rabbi there had to "approve" my rabbi. There was a questionaire my rabbi had to fill out to be "approved". One of the questions was about him doing an interfaith marriage. My rabbi said he would not do one (as most would not). When we met with my rabbi before the wedding he was telling DH and I about this questionaire and mentioned that although it wasn't asked, he would perform a same sex marriage if both people were Jewish. It has never been requested of him so he hasn't had to do one yet but he would!

Posted 2/3/06 11:44 AM
 
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