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bklyngirl
COULD THIS BE MY YEAR??
Member since 6/05 15758 total posts
Name:
Gail
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9/11 widows
dh and i were talking last night how some of the widows have remarried already. do you think its too soon that they got remarried.
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Posted 9/12/06 8:50 AM  |
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KateDevine
*
Member since 6/06 24950 total posts
Name:
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Re: 9/11 widows
I don't think that is for anyone to "think" about except them.
Sorry if that sounded harsh, but they are all grown women and society shouldn't dictate or look down on them b/c they either fell in love again or wanted to get married for some reason.
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| Posted 9/12/06 8:52 AM |
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Michi
My Love
Member since 5/05 31600 total posts
Name:
M
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Re: 9/11 widows
Posted by bklyngirl
dh and i were talking last night how some of the widows have remarried already. do you think its too soon that they got remarried.
5 yrs is quite some time.. perhaps they waited 2 yrs even to grieve, met someone and got engaged 1 1/2 yrs later... it doesnt sound farfected to me, they have no choice but to go on and cant live in sorrow
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| Posted 9/12/06 8:52 AM |
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LaurenExp
Waiting patiently for baby sis
Member since 8/06 11613 total posts
Name:
L-Diddy EDD 11/11/11 :)
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Re: 9/11 widows
Well, here's the thing.
Just because your husband/wife died in 9/11 doesn't mean that your relationship was good. Who knows the status of half of these people's relationships before the tragedy? They may have been on the verge of divorce. I don't think it's too soon, especially those men and women who are very young. As horrible as it is, it has been 5 years and they need to move on with their lives. And just because they are moving on, it doesn't mean that they've ever forgotten.
IMHO :o)
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| Posted 9/12/06 8:52 AM |
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Lisa
I'm a PANK!!!
Member since 5/05 22334 total posts
Name:
Professional Aunts No Kids
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Re: 9/11 widows
Posted by bklyngirl
dh and i were talking last night how some of the widows have remarried already. do you think its too soon that they got remarried.
I saw a show with Diane Sawyer that she had the widows on with thier kids...5 years later and allot of them are remarried. I have very mixed feelings about that. i have been with my DH for a total of nine years and god forbid something happened to him...I dont know how long it would take me to be interested in someone else. I guess each person is different but I dont think I could meet someone before 5 years....
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| Posted 9/12/06 8:53 AM |
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Blu-ize
Plan B is Now Plan A
Member since 7/05 32475 total posts
Name:
Susan
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Re: 9/11 widows
I also think it should be up to them. If they are ready, then they should find some happiness in their lives.
There should be no time limit just as there should be no time limit if someone lost their spouse due to other reasons.
You have to find your own happiness in this world and not let society dicate how you live your life.
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| Posted 9/12/06 8:54 AM |
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lululu
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 9511 total posts
Name:
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Re: 9/11 widows
I think that 5 years is more than enough time for people to grieve the loss of someone AND find new love.
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| Posted 9/12/06 8:59 AM |
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bklyngirl
COULD THIS BE MY YEAR??
Member since 6/05 15758 total posts
Name:
Gail
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Re: 9/11 widows
ok. we were talking about it. i guess unless we're in the situation we don't know what we would do. i really didn't mean for this to start a debate. if this tarts a debate, then i apologize
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| Posted 9/12/06 9:02 AM |
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IGLover
Y'all come back now, ya hear!!
Member since 9/05 2361 total posts
Name:
Kristen
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Re: 9/11 widows
It is up to the person. Anyone can find love, there is no time frame. Life goes on, and so does love.
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| Posted 9/12/06 9:05 AM |
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Sweetpea130000
My Love!
Member since 5/05 2375 total posts
Name:
Shandra
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Re: 9/11 widows
I have read the stories of a couple of the widows that have either remarried or found love again and both of them said that their lost husband is always in their hearts and their new partner knows this.
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| Posted 9/12/06 9:07 AM |
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MrsPornStar
Partners in crime
Member since 10/05 14656 total posts
Name:
Mama
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Re: 9/11 widows
Posted by KristenNYC
It is up to the person. Anyone can find love, there is no time frame. Life goes on, and so does love.
I completely agree. Each person's situation is different.
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| Posted 9/12/06 9:12 AM |
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CaseyGirl
Mommy to 3 Boys :)
Member since 5/05 19978 total posts
Name:
Jen - counting my blessings...
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Re: 9/11 widows
No...I think it is fine. Wouldn't their spouses want them to be happy?
My uncle lost his wife on 11/11/87 (car accident) and met his 2nd wife shortly after and they got married in 1990. Life goes on....
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| Posted 9/12/06 9:12 AM |
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IGLover
Y'all come back now, ya hear!!
Member since 9/05 2361 total posts
Name:
Kristen
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Re: 9/11 widows
Posted by hmpena
Posted by KristenNYC
It is up to the person. Anyone can find love, there is no time frame. Life goes on, and so does love.
I completely agree. Each person's situation is different.
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| Posted 9/12/06 9:16 AM |
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BabyAvocado
Happy New Year
Member since 5/05 17334 total posts
Name:
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Re: 9/11 widows
I really don't think it's anyone else's place to judge or say what is an appropriate amount of time to grieve and then move on from losing a spouse. I'm sure that their spouses will never be replaced or forgotten, nor will they ever completely heal from the tragedy.
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| Posted 9/12/06 9:16 AM |
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Lanabean
Yoginis
Member since 11/05 9202 total posts
Name:
Lana
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Re: 9/11 widows
There is a new book written by four of the widows called "Love You, Mean It" that discusses their personal feelings about these things. I may pick it up. And ball my eyes out. Topics include, When is it okay to take off your ring? Is it normal to keep my husband's voice on my answering machine? How do I date again? Should I feel guilty. Each chapter is written by the women; I think they take turns writing.
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| Posted 9/12/06 9:42 AM |
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MsMitcia
27 dresses.?.ha..TY everyone
Member since 8/06 1527 total posts
Name:
Tina
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Re: 9/11 widows
I'm not going to judge, but when I saw the Post yesterday and they did a recap of a woman who lost her fiance. She made the cover of the post crying, clutching his picture five yeaars ago. They caught up with her and now she has since married, divorced, and now lives in Vegas and is in another serious relationship with a club owner. I don't know why, but it kind of bothered me.
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| Posted 9/12/06 9:47 AM |
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Libragal07
Loving Summer.....
Member since 8/06 6636 total posts
Name:
Samantha aka Sammy Bones
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Re: 9/11 widows
I am sure they are all hurt and they will never ever forget their husbands that died. From the show I watched last night all of them brought them into their new relationship. All the kids asked questions, they had photos everywhere. I feel that they should be able to find happiness again. Why should they die alone? I am sure thats what they would really want for them too. To find love again....
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| Posted 9/12/06 9:56 AM |
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lilqtny
-Crossfit & pitbull addict
Member since 7/06 2830 total posts
Name:
Tracy
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Re: 9/11 widows
Does anybody think that maybe the tragedy took so much out of them that they turned to other men/women to fill a void? Especially the girl who has since married and divorced and is in another serious relationship. I mean maybe it just destroyed her so horribly, emotionally, that she is on a destructive path of bad relationships.
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| Posted 9/12/06 9:59 AM |
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IrishTracy
Believe!!
Member since 5/05 15167 total posts
Name:
Tracy
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Re: 9/11 widows
It's not like it was before the 1st anniversary. Who's to say what any of us would do in the same situation. And just because someone remarries doesn't mean that they love their 1st spouses any less.
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| Posted 9/12/06 10:00 AM |
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MsMitcia
27 dresses.?.ha..TY everyone
Member since 8/06 1527 total posts
Name:
Tina
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Re: 9/11 widows
Posted by lilqtny
Does anybody think that maybe the tragedy took so much out of them that they turned to other men/women to fill a void? Especially the girl who has since married and divorced and is in another serious relationship. I mean maybe it just destroyed her so horribly, emotionally, that she is on a destructive path of bad relationships.
Never thought of it that way. Makes an awful lot of sense.
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| Posted 9/12/06 10:00 AM |
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Libragal07
Loving Summer.....
Member since 8/06 6636 total posts
Name:
Samantha aka Sammy Bones
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Re: 9/11 widows
Posted by lilqtny
Does anybody think that maybe the tragedy took so much out of them that they turned to other men/women to fill a void? Especially the girl who has since married and divorced and is in another serious relationship. I mean maybe it just destroyed her so horribly, emotionally, that she is on a destructive path of bad relationships.
i believe this as well!
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| Posted 9/12/06 10:02 AM |
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eroxgirl
My Loves
Member since 5/05 15697 total posts
Name:
Rebecca
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Re: 9/11 widows
Plenty of widows were able to move on with their lives and I think that's a good thing. For over a year after 9/11 I read a monthly update from a girl who had lost her fiance that day. I never met her personally, but I caught a glimpse of what she felt. The pain she expressed in her writing was so raw - I could often be found in tears at my computer just reading about it - I *hope* she can or has found someone to fill that void.
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| Posted 9/12/06 10:12 AM |
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Tumbalina
Better than the news!
Member since 2/06 2840 total posts
Name:
Angela
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Re: 9/11 widows
I think that is a decision only the widow can make and no one should judge them.
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| Posted 9/12/06 10:15 AM |
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SweetestOfPeas
J'taime Paris!
Member since 3/06 32345 total posts
Name:
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Re: 9/11 widows
I can't help but be happy for them! they've been through so much pain 
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| Posted 9/12/06 10:17 AM |
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Kate07
Feel better my little guy!
Member since 5/05 4476 total posts
Name:
Kate
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Re: 9/11 widows
I really think it is up to the widow/widower and the time they feel they are ready to move on. I certainly don't feel it is too soon. If anything, this incredible tragedy should teach us life is precious, and if you can find love & happiness then you should do so.
DH and I have discussed if anything happened to either one of us, the other should not feel guilty to move on.
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| Posted 9/12/06 10:21 AM |
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