Advice needed regarding daycare issues

ETA: PLEASE DO NOT QUOTE! TIA!

I am a regular poster but using another name trying to avoid lurkers, sorry!

My DC is in daycare for a few weeks now, so far I am not thrilled with the place. They came highly recommended and the staff seems to be very caring. However, there are a few things that's been bothering me...

1. At the start of DC's registration, I had provided them with an instruction sheet with things that I would like them to administer everyday. IMO very reasonable things ie, A&D at each diaper change, wipe mouth/face after feeding etc...
DC came home a few times with formula dried all over the mouth. Nothing too bad, but c'mon, isn't it common practice that you clean the child up after feedings?

2. DC came home with scratches today, one cut seems to be pretty deep and you can tell it was bleeding. It's already scabby by the time I saw it, we were in the car on our way home. I don't think it hurts DC much, but it killed me.
DO I ASK THEM ABOUT IT? I completely understand that children will get hurt, but DC is an infant, does not even crawl yet.

3. I usually put labels on DC's bottles, but today I forgot, and the bottles came home with permanent markers on them with DC's name.
Yes, it is true that I am anal about things like that. BUT WHY would you use permanent marker? Wouldn't a crayon suffice?


Would all this bother you? I want to say something to the staff & director of the daycare, but I am concerned that they will treat DC differently if they feel I am being unpleasant.
A part of me is telling myself to pick my battles, the other part is saying I need to put my foot down, that my baby should be cared for according to my wishes.
I need your honest advice. THANK YOU!

Message edited 6/23/2009 9:38:52 PM.

Re: Advice needed regarding daycare issues

Honestly, I think the only thing you mentioned that would really bother me would be the scratches. A little milk on the mouth wouldn't be enough to have me switching centers. Nor would marker on a bottle. But that's just me.

Re: Advice needed regarding daycare issues

I am putting my twins in nursery school for 2 times a week 2 hours a day, and the teachers told me they want to know the diaper routing/ if they are potty training what stage they are at, and also what snacks are ok to feed them etc.

- To be honest the formula on the mouth wouldnt bother me too much.
I am very anal with my kids faces and hands always being clean but a little formula wont really harm dc and prob bothers you more than him.
- The permanent marker on the bottle, yea if it didnt wash off prob would bother me BUT even if it doesnt come off that would be my designated "daycare" bottle.
- As for the scrape- thats where I see a problem, if it had blood I would assume it hurt your son and that he cried and if thats the case they should tell you, I would be scared of was the wound cleaned? infection? etc That is def something I would bring to their attention and of all your battles this one would be one I would bring up no questions asked because it effects your son.

Ultimately your paying them to care for your children and if something really bothers you dont hesitate to speak up. Im sure they are not going to take it out on your innocent child beacuse you bring something to their attention. Good luck

Re: Advice needed regarding daycare issues

Let me say this, I think I am a good mom and my kids have had dried formula on thier face, food on their clothes etc... These things go along with being a baby. Maybe they wiped his mouth and then he drooled a milky drool while napping, things happen.
My kids have also had scratches on them from my nails, my zipper etc. It happens. I do think if it was bad enough, they should have just told you about it. So maybe just nicely say that you noticed a pretty bad scratch on him and you were wondering what happened? Ask if they could notify you of things like this, if that makes you feel better. You can be nice and get your point across.

Re: Advice needed regarding daycare issues

Try posing it like, I heard that some daycare have booboo reports and I was just wondering if scratches would be reported or if it was more for a bloody nose or hard fall.

Depending on their answer you can say b/c I noticed that DC had a scratch yesterday and it wasn't brought to my attention.

It could have been another kids finger nails or even DCs (did you check?)

At my old sitter (which was shut down by state), DS came home 3-4 times with these odd scratches on his head - we searched the toys, carpet, cribs and couldn't find anything that was making them - we think he might have just rolled over on something. The sitter said she'd watch him more closely. But my DS has a very high tolerance for pain so he might not have cried when it happened so she wouldn't have known.
HTH

Re: Advice needed regarding daycare issues

Honestly I think milk around your DC's mouth is not a big deal at all. Babies sometimes get a little messy.

The marker on the bottles....It is very important that they don't mix up your DC's bottles with another childs. Occasionally we have sent Chelsea in without a labeled bottle and they do mark it with her initials. I don't really think that is an issue either. What would be an issue would be if another child drank your BM/Formula.

As for the scratch...they happen. Chelsea has scratched her face before with her nails. Sometimes another child has accidently scratched her. If that concerns you I'd ask the teacher where it came from and when they noticed it.

None of these would cause me to pull my child out of the daycare.

Re: Advice needed regarding daycare issues

Being a former day care teacher, I want to jump in if thats OK..

The milk around the mouth, I don't think I'd be too annoyed. Me, personally, yes, I tried to send the kids home as clean as possible, but, I will admit, sometimes it may have been over looked.

The marker...How many times I have asked parents to label bottles is beyond me. Totally understandable if its forgotten. We used permanent marker if the bottles were not labled.
We did not want to mix up bottles and if the state came in for a visit and it wasn't labled, we get in trouble! Everything must be labled!

I would definitley question the teachers about the scratches! We had to document everything! It should have been documented.

Re: Advice needed regarding daycare issues

We are not thinking about switching daycare yet. I just wanted to see what are considered reasonable things for me to bring up and what not. Because I know I can be anal. DC is my first, I am new at this.
I didn't think the milk mustaches are a big deal, but that I was trying to use it as an example to point out that it seems they are not following the instructions I had provided. And to seek opinions from you all whether or not I should give a "friendly reminder" of things like that.

I will bring up the scratches tomorrow, a good point was brought up, what was used to clean the wound? Now I am a bit paranoid thinking about it.

Thank you all for your advices

ETA: They had never once asked me to label the bottles, but I do it anyway. The cooler bag is labeled, they usually put the entire bag in their fridge.

Message edited 6/23/2009 10:01:19 PM.

Re: Advice needed regarding daycare issues

Honestly, I think that the only thing that could MAYBE be a concern are the scratches, and I'd ask about them. Maybe her nails need to be trimmed too?

As for the dried milk, as much as I'd love to say that my son is always neat and clean, he sometimes has food on his face/mouth/hands, it happens! Maybe she fell asleep and they didn't want to wipe her face and wake her?

As for the marker, they are making sure they don't mix up her bottle with another baby's! Imagine if she got someone else's formula or BM!!!! Wouldn't that be worse than some marker??

Re: Advice needed regarding daycare issues

The only thing that would bother me is the scratches. Even then, most likely it is an accident. But in situations like that I was made aware of the incident when it happened. It was usually very minor, and just a normal infant accident, like bumping her head or whatever.

The formula on the mouth, I'm not too concerned about.

Writing on the bottle, I feel is our responsibility as parents to make sure the labels are there. Otherwise the bottles can get mixed up and one baby may get the wrong formula. I've forgotten to label stuff and it was labeled for me, and felt it was my fault for not labeling, and since have done so. These teachers have one priority....to take good care of the kids/babies. Labeling things is not there responsibility. Whatever they have handy to write with is what they are going to use.

My feeling is, as long as DD is kept dry, fed, and gets her needs met (nurturing as an infant and stimulation as a toddler), and is safe, that is ALL I care about. If you feel that these teachers have the main priorities taken care of, little things like that should not really matter. The scratch is a concern. I would bring it to their attention. They may know what happened and forgot to tell you. If you don't think they are fantastic, then I would start looking around for other options.

Message edited 6/23/2009 10:13:28 PM.

Re: Advice needed regarding daycare issues

As far as the scratches go you definitely have the right to ask and I honestly would! Our "school/daycare" ALWAYS informed me about every scratch and bruise... in a written "accident" report-once he was even bitten and they called me as well as filed a report and it didn't break the skin or anything-so no big deal but I was glad to be informed since DC came and told me all about it.
As for the other stuff, I have to be honest I have a very good friend whom I love but she writes letters and demands... for all the schools and centers she goes to regarding her kids and she always has an issue with all the places she goes and I never do. I honestly think when you choose a center it should be based on a trust relationship and when you start placing demands on them in certain aspects they think you are telling them how to do their job and they get a little ****** and WILL treat your kids differently. That said I think there are certain things that need to be discussed such as allergies, possible soothing habits for infants if all else fails... but I don't think I would make "demands or definitive requests" unless it was due to a health or safety issue.
I think you are 100% correct when you say choose your battles and based on my friends experience with 3 different places and no real satisfaction I may just let them do their job or choose another center that you are more comfortable with.
Good luck!

Re: Advice needed regarding daycare issues

The scratches would bother me and I would ask what happened. I would have been mad about the bottles because I'm anal like that and never write on my stuff with magic marker. They could have stuck tape on and wrote on the tape. I've seen that done.