anyone else worried about families reactions to TTC and eventually a BFP?

our families can be.. well.. brutely honest and somtims its to a fault because they dont realize their words and comments are hurtful. i know it has absolutely NOTHING to do with what they say or feel but i cant help but worry about what their reactions will be whenw e do finally get a BFP... the first time. wasnt quite what iw as expecting (which i dont understand considering we were already married and happily and together 6 years prior and were ready) and im praying this time around is a better reaction we have been telling people we are waiting because i dont want to be hunted down with questions if we have a difficult time. so im assuming we will have some of the same reactions as the last time since people think were waiting.. not that it should matter to be honest!.... im rambiling.. anyone else in the same boat?

Re: anyone else worried about families reactions to TTC and eventually a BFP?

Sorta yes and sorta no lol. From my DH's family they are all going to be beyond excited. My family will also being extrememly excited but I know my mom wanted me to finish up a few things in my life before TTC...but when I give her the news I know shes going to throw all that in the garbage and start spoiling me haha. Sorry that your family can be so brutal..mine def. can be too. Despite it all they will eventually accept it and love your LO as Im sure they love your DD now

Re: anyone else worried about families reactions to TTC and eventually a BFP?

thats ust it mille.. abby was semi unexpected so when we broke the news it was as shocking to them as it was to us.... but as soon as inital shock wore off they were like little kids in a candy store!!! so im expecting itto be that way now also.. im just worried ill get the.. "whats the rush your so young you should have gone back to work first to save some money" all the negitive then the positve... i wish they could just skip the crap and be happy from the get go!

Re: anyone else worried about families reactions to TTC and eventually a BFP?

Haha...if only life were that simple I was at that point a couple of years ago when we first got married. My mom was saying things like, "Dont rush it, you are still young" and 3 years later this is all thats on her mind lol. Why dont you not tell anyone you are TTC so when you get pregnant you can say, "Opps, it was an accident" and therefore avoiding all negative opinions and going straight to the good stuff!

Re: anyone else worried about families reactions to TTC and eventually a BFP?

Posted by bettybcafe

Haha...if only life were that simple I was at that point a couple of years ago when we first got married. My mom was saying things like, "Dont rush it, you are still young" and 3 years later this is all thats on her mind lol. Why dont you not tell anyone you are TTC so when you get pregnant you can say, "Opps, it was an accident" and therefore avoiding all negative opinions and going straight to the good stuff!

Re: anyone else worried about families reactions to TTC and eventually a BFP?

for a while when i talked about TTC my mom always said "wait, you're too young" and sometimes it bothered me. but i try to remember where she came from. my mom was married at 19 and had 3 kids by the time she was 23!! she just encouraged me to "be young and live my life". well, DH and I did that for 3 years of our marriage. we go out to dinner and small getaways frequently. we have also gone away, internationally, every year since our HM, so 4 times since marriage. FINALLY, my mom is super excited and about us TTC and asks me if im pregnant all the time. aside from my mom i know everyone else will be SUPER excited.

Re: anyone else worried about families reactions to TTC and eventually a BFP?

Posted by Meggo613

Posted by bettybcafe

Haha...if only life were that simple I was at that point a couple of years ago when we first got married. My mom was saying things like, "Dont rush it, you are still young" and 3 years later this is all thats on her mind lol. Why dont you not tell anyone you are TTC so when you get pregnant you can say, "Opps, it was an accident" and therefore avoiding all negative opinions and going straight to the good stuff!

thats just it we arent telling our families! my irl friends from here know and thats about it! they are so supportive their like family! and my FSIL is over on LIW so if she lurks over here she will know but love her like my own sister so she'd be happy if she knew!

Re: anyone else worried about families reactions to TTC and eventually a BFP?

I'm not TTC just yet but im actually terrified to get pregnant again cause i know our moms are gonna be like WHAT?!
Yesterday DH and I were joking around and sorta play fighting and he went to fake punch my stomach and goes "OH wait I should stop cause of the baby in there (mind you there is NO BABY lol) and my mom goes "What did you just say? you're having another baby already?" all disappointed. So we had to convince her noooooo and she prob stil doesnt believe me.

Whatever I do what I want lol

Re: anyone else worried about families reactions to TTC and eventually a BFP?

i am because everyone said wait a while before thinking about kids - we have only been married for 5 months

Re: anyone else worried about families reactions to TTC and eventually a BFP?

our families will be thrilled, and we've been married a long time and together a really long time. that said, I'm sure many comments will be made behind our backs about how: 1) we dont own a home and rent a small apt, 2) we are still "too young" and 3) we should get more established in our careers first.

we are not TTC yet but I do worry sometimes... not so much about family but the rest of the world

Re: anyone else worried about families reactions to TTC and eventually a BFP?

we are almost married 2 years....i think both sets of parents would be thrilled if we got pregnant...

i think my mom is getting used to the idea of maybe having a grandchild around within the next year or so - she is the one i'd be worried about having a bad reaction ...but lately we talk about it a lot, and she gave me advice about ttc and she shared her experiences with me so she must be getting excited and i think she will be really happy if it happens...

i wouldn't worry about it - she actually told me not to tell anyone when we try one of the reasons being you don't want to hear people's negative comments about why you should wait - she said nobody wants to hear that they should wait until they have more money, or buy a bigger house, (those were just examples she gave me) etc.

Re: anyone else worried about families reactions to TTC and eventually a BFP?

my family will be beyond excited....people dont "plan" babies in our family, so them knowing that we are trying is like too much for them to handle, lol.

DHs family, on the other hand, may not be as excited...they (with the exception of SIL) don't know we are trying, and FIL kept talking about some "5 yr plan" when we first got married (1 year ago) so im really not sure what that means. but when they get over the inital shock, i think they will be pleased. especially when MIL learns she will be watching LO when this mamma goes back to work

Re: anyone else worried about families reactions to TTC and eventually a BFP?

my family- they will be super excited.
his family- NOOOOOOO. they are crazy people. going to hold off until the baby is here to tell them.

Re: anyone else worried about families reactions to TTC and eventually a BFP?

Both families will be thrilled.

They want us to have a baby yesterday

Well except my 20 yr old SIL is will be mad I cant party with her anymore

Re: anyone else worried about families reactions to TTC and eventually a BFP?

I think my family will be concerned just because we just suffered a m/c. However, I think they'll be super excited. I'm just worried about childcare and think my Mom will be upset that my Father-in-law is able to retire and offered to watch the baby. I'm sure no matter what there will be comments and opinions that are just not wanted, but that is family!

Re: anyone else worried about families reactions to TTC and eventually a BFP?

Not at all, I think everyone is waiting for us to announce the 2nd one is on the way!

Re: anyone else worried about families reactions to TTC and eventually a BFP?

my parents won't be happy at first. Then i think things might switch (hope) dh's family (he has no parents) will be happy.

My parents think i do too much as is and to add a child will probably kill me. Plus they said we can't afford it we are too poor.

Re: anyone else worried about families reactions to TTC and eventually a BFP?

My parents would freak if we announced #2!! We are in a 1 bedroom and my mom watches DS full time!! If it wasn't for this, we would be trying right now.

Re: anyone else worried about families reactions to TTC and eventually a BFP?

My family will be fine, I think they are kinda expecting an announcement soon DH & I are 33 and (IN MY FAMILY"S OPINION ) thats old to start having a family. Whatever. I am concerned about 1 thing w/them...my relationship w/my father & step-mom is VERY rocky right now. I am worried that they will be indifferent b/c we are having relationship issues. I think that would break my heart.

DH's parents......not sure, they keep telling us to wait. Not sure why they think its any of their business, we didnt exactly ask for their advice but I know they are saying it w/love. I think, like others ladies have said, once they process the info, they will be over the moon! The only thing I am worried about w/MIL is that she will make it about her. She is wonderful & very loving but she tends to need to be the center of attention w/any family situation. I believe that very quickly it wont be DH & my first child, it will be HER 1st grandchild. whatever. Thats why we decided not to announce BFP till we are 12 wks in. We want to make it about us and our little family for a while.

Re: anyone else worried about families reactions to TTC and eventually a BFP?

My mom can't wait to be a grandma! I think my dad would be excited too.

I honestly have no idea how DH's parents will react. That's actually one of the things I like about them - the never bring it up, never pressure us!

Re: anyone else worried about families reactions to TTC and eventually a BFP?

I am really worried about telling my family this time around. They weren't happy that my girls are so close in age and both my father and mil made comments after my second DD that we were all done now. DH and I both didn't say anything, but it's ultimately our decision. They will definitely be upset this time, but I don't really care.

Re: anyone else worried about families reactions to TTC and eventually a BFP?

i am worried but for the opposite reason. i wont tell ILs that we are trying or when we do get BFP i wont tell them for awhile. They already put soo much baby pressure on us that i don't them to know anything bc they will just put more pressure on us. i need to wait and make sure its going to happen and stick before they have any idea.

Re: anyone else worried about families reactions to TTC and eventually a BFP?

when we get pregnant within the next year, DH will be telling my parents lol

after a year i might be able to tell them

Re: anyone else worried about families reactions to TTC and eventually a BFP?

I feel lucky not to be worried about this. I think our family and friends have worse reactions to us not being PG or having kids yet b/c we are in our 30's and have been married for a few years. All of my DH's friends have 1-2 kids except him. People are always asking us when, when, whem 24/7 so I think they will be happy when I am PG!