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WonderLady
LIF Infant
Member since 1/15 355 total posts
Name:
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Asking about bringing sibling to party (I know we have done this topic before, lol)
Okay, so I am of the camp that I have never asked to bring my other DS to a party that he isn't invited to. However, on the flip side, I always say yes when someone asks me if they can bring a sibling. I just shut up and pay as it is usually only one or two extra kids.
My younger DS has an invitation for a party that is in a rec room of a building complex. I have no sitter for my older guy. My dh was gonna watch him but has to work.
Is it acceptable to ask to bring the other DS in light of the fact that it's not a pay per head type place? Or is the rule that it's rude no matter where it is?
I feel bad to just change my rsvp to no, but that's my plan I guess.
Eta, not sure if it matters, but my boys are very close in age, so it's not where an 8 year old would be with a bunch of 3 year olds or something. They're only 1 grade apart.
Message edited 5/1/2015 9:44:01 AM.
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Posted 5/1/15 9:40 AM  |
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jmp1105
LIF Adolescent
Member since 12/11 553 total posts
Name:
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Re: Asking about bringing sibling to party (I know we have done this topic before, lol)
I would call the mom and say that you are so sorry that you have to change your rsvp but you have nobody to watch your older one. hopefully she'll tell you to just bring him.
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| Posted 5/1/15 9:58 AM |
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Mara1017
LIF Adolescent
Member since 5/11 696 total posts
Name:
Mara
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Asking about bringing sibling to party (I know we have done this topic before, lol)
I would not bring your other child without asking the host. There may not be a per person cost but the host I am sure would want to make sure that there is enough food for everyone coming. Also, there may be an issue with space and they may be near the max. I think your three choices are to: (1) RSVP no; (2) explain the situation to the host and ask if your other child can come; or (3) get a babysitter for your other child.
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| Posted 5/1/15 11:08 AM |
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jams92
Member since 1/12 6105 total posts
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Asking about bringing sibling to party (I know we have done this topic before, lol)
i would call the host and explain the situation...let them know you can either bring both of your boys or you wont be able to go and let her decide
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| Posted 5/1/15 11:22 AM |
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kahlua716
3 Girls for Me!
Member since 8/07 12475 total posts
Name:
Keri
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Re: Asking about bringing sibling to party (I know we have done this topic before, lol)
Posted by jams92
i would call the host and explain the situation...let them know you can either bring both of your boys or you wont be able to go and let her decide
This is what I would do.
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| Posted 5/1/15 11:30 AM |
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Re: Asking about bringing sibling to party (I know we have done this topic before, lol)
Posted by jams92
i would call the host and explain the situation...let them know you can either bring both of your boys or you wont be able to go and let her decide
This seems like the right way to handle it.
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| Posted 5/1/15 12:57 PM |
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BargainMama
LIF Adult
Member since 5/09 15657 total posts
Name:
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Re: Asking about bringing sibling to party (I know we have done this topic before, lol)
I think it's rude to even ask to be honest. It puts the host on the spot. Can you drop your child off at the party? I would decline if I had no sitter for my other child, and I couldn't drop off.
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| Posted 5/1/15 3:18 PM |
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WonderLady
LIF Infant
Member since 1/15 355 total posts
Name:
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Re: Asking about bringing sibling to party (I know we have done this topic before, lol)
Posted by BargainMama
I think it's rude to even ask to be honest. It puts the host on the spot. Can you drop your child off at the party? I would decline if I had no sitter for my other child, and I couldn't drop off.
No, I definitely don't know them well enough that I would feel comfortable dropping off.
I guess I'm just going to change my response to no.
In a million years I wouldn't ask to bring another child to a play type place but I thought this was probably different since it's just food. I guess goody bag too, I hadn't considered that.
I feel like even saying that I'm not coming bc of my other son is already sort of pushing her to invite him.
Although I have to say that if it was my party in a rec room and not a pay per head type place, I wouldn't even bat an eye at a sibling coming.
Message edited 5/1/2015 3:53:38 PM.
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| Posted 5/1/15 3:46 PM |
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BargainMama
LIF Adult
Member since 5/09 15657 total posts
Name:
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Re: Asking about bringing sibling to party (I know we have done this topic before, lol)
Posted by WonderLady
Posted by BargainMama
I think it's rude to even ask to be honest. It puts the host on the spot. Can you drop your child off at the party? I would decline if I had no sitter for my other child, and I couldn't drop off.
No, I definitely don't know them well enough that I would feel comfortable dropping off.
I guess I'm just going to change my response to no.
In a million years I wouldn't ask to bring another child to a, play type place but I thought this was probably different since it's just food. I guess goody bag too, I hadn't considered that.
I feel like even saying that I'm not coming bc of my other son is already sort of pushing her to invite him.
I never have parties out, but I have very specific detailed things for each guest, so honestly, another head would throw things off for me.
Last year we had 2 unexpected guests, and even though it was at home, I had MANY personalized things, and JUST enough items for the invitees, so it really stressed me out!
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| Posted 5/1/15 3:49 PM |
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ali120206
2 Boys
Member since 7/06 17792 total posts
Name:
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Asking about bringing sibling to party (I know we have done this topic before, lol)
I would call, explain your situation, and then say I'm going to have to change my RSVP to no, I apologize.
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| Posted 5/1/15 4:03 PM |
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MCD0524
LIF Adult
Member since 4/10 1199 total posts
Name:
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Asking about bringing sibling to party (I know we have done this topic before, lol)
I am the odd one out here. I think its fine to ask. My kids are 3 and 10 months and I am dreading the nonsense...I hope someone always asks me if they get stuck rather then just declines. Party place or not I will never let a mother drop out because she can't find someone to sit for her child, we could all be there anytime.... I agree to say you can't come because of your son and see if she offers. I hope she does :)
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| Posted 5/1/15 5:11 PM |
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lcherian
He is the reason!
Member since 2/06 2512 total posts
Name:
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Re: Asking about bringing sibling to party (I know we have done this topic before, lol)
I wouldn't want one of my child's friends not to come because a mom doesn't have childcare for another child of hers.
Like others have said, I would say something like, we would love to come but my husband can't watch my other child. And see if she offers an invitation of your younger son.
Message edited 5/2/2015 7:43:42 AM.
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| Posted 5/2/15 7:42 AM |
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WonderLady
LIF Infant
Member since 1/15 355 total posts
Name:
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Asking about bringing sibling to party (I know we have done this topic before, lol)
Just as an update, the party was this morning. I ended up leaving my other son at a school friend's house for a play date. The host of the party said, "don't you have another son?" and then basically said I was so silly not to just bring him and it was totally just the more the merrier. The party was very laid back with plenty of pizza and juice and generic little favor bags that there were a ton of. I said thanks but played it off like my other son was really looking forward to the play date anyway, blah blah. Funny.
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| Posted 5/3/15 5:57 PM |
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AllyMally
LIF Adolescent
Member since 1/13 881 total posts
Name:
Alyson
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Re: Asking about bringing sibling to party (I know we have done this topic before, lol)
Posted by WonderLady
Just as an update, the party was this morning. I ended up leaving my other son at a school friend's house for a play date. The host of the party said, "don't you have another son?" and then basically said I was so silly not to just bring him and it was totally just the more the merrier. The party was very laid back with plenty of pizza and juice and generic little favor bags that there were a ton of. I said thanks but played it off like my other son was really looking forward to the play date anyway, blah blah. Funny.
 That's awesome and I hope from this if it happens again you just ask the host. I would be mortified as the host if another parent didn't come or had to change plans because of a sibling. It's a kids birthday not a coronation ball. People need to get past goody bags and catered lunches and get back to normal kid birthdays IMHO. It's all just to much.
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| Posted 5/3/15 8:49 PM |
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ohbaby08
Winter is Coming
Member since 10/07 1718 total posts
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Re: Asking about bringing sibling to party (I know we have done this topic before, lol)
Posted by AllyMally
Posted by WonderLady
Just as an update, the party was this morning. I ended up leaving my other son at a school friend's house for a play date. The host of the party said, "don't you have another son?" and then basically said I was so silly not to just bring him and it was totally just the more the merrier. The party was very laid back with plenty of pizza and juice and generic little favor bags that there were a ton of. I said thanks but played it off like my other son was really looking forward to the play date anyway, blah blah. Funny.
That's awesome and I hope from this if it happens again you just ask the host. I would be mortified as the host if another parent didn't come or had to change plans because of a sibling. It's a kids birthday not a coronation ball. People need to get past goody bags and catered lunches and get back to normal kid birthdays IMHO. It's all just to much.
Agreed. I wouldn't find it rude at all if someone asked if they could bring a younger sibling. I've had people ask me and I've never cared.
I would never want one of my child's friends to miss their party because of a sibling.
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| Posted 5/4/15 10:13 AM |
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Xelindrya
Mommy's little YouTube Star!
Member since 8/05 14470 total posts
Name:
Veronica
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Re: Asking about bringing sibling to party (I know we have done this topic before, lol)
Posted by kahlua716
Posted by jams92
i would call the host and explain the situation...let them know you can either bring both of your boys or you wont be able to go and let her decide
This is what I would do.
yup.. I often forget to point out that I EXPECT siblings. I can't imagine putting any parent in a place where one kid is ok but they need to find a place for the other three or something. Its always all welcome for me. That said I forget people don't think like me so I get that call "We are thinking of going but need to find a sitter for XX" Then I generally clarify they are absolutely welcome.
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| Posted 5/5/15 8:55 AM |
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