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CaidensMommy
My 3 Miracles!
Member since 5/05 5777 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Been looking on the MLS for other houses in the area for sale...
All I can say is that we are never going to sell our house. I am just soooo upset.  The price range varies a lot, but there are a few houses that are over 20K+ less than what we're asking with updates, etc. Then there are houses that are around the same price and over what we're asking. But to compare our's to the houses that are so much cheaper is just so depressing. I just can't see us selling it now and there is just no way we can go that low? Not with all the work we've done to the house that we had to put on credit cards, and our 2nd mortgage. But if we never updated the house we would have never had a chance. Also, most of the houses that are for sale have been on the market since August/September of last year!!! I can't believe this. We can't wait that long or even longer. What do we do??? We are just going to ruin everything. I am so mad about the economy. It's ruined everything for us. Like we knew this was going to happen a year or so ago? If we knew it was going to happen we would have put the house on the market the way it was for much cheaper. We are so s@rewed. At this point, we are not behind with any payments, and our credit is in good standing still. But it won't be for long. So much for my hard work. It was for nothing. 
Message edited 2/12/2009 10:08:36 AM.
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Posted 2/12/09 10:07 AM  |
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lullabella
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 2246 total posts
Name:
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Re: Been looking on the MLS for other houses in the area for sale...
See about doing a short sale. Ask you realtor. Dont give up!! 
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| Posted 2/12/09 10:20 AM |
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Ophelia
she's baaccckkkk ;)
Member since 5/06 23378 total posts
Name:
remember, when Gulliver traveled....
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Re: Been looking on the MLS for other houses in the area for sale...
have you reached out to ANY of your creditors?
they will work with you so that you don't go into default.
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| Posted 2/12/09 10:23 AM |
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CaidensMommy
My 3 Miracles!
Member since 5/05 5777 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: Been looking on the MLS for other houses in the area for sale...
Posted by lullabella
See about doing a short sale. Ask you realtor. Dont give up!!
I thought to do a short sale you have to be in default with your morgage? 
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| Posted 2/12/09 10:23 AM |
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CaidensMommy
My 3 Miracles!
Member since 5/05 5777 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: Been looking on the MLS for other houses in the area for sale...
Posted by Ophelia
have you reached out to ANY of your creditors?
they will work with you so that you don't go into default.
No, not yet... I was saving that for the last possible moment.
This just su@cks!!! 
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| Posted 2/12/09 10:24 AM |
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Janice
Sweet Jessie Quinn
Member since 5/05 27567 total posts
Name:
Janice
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Re: Been looking on the MLS for other houses in the area for sale...
I had one cc forever...over 10 years.
this month out of no where I was jacked up to 16% from 8%.
not late or over limit. They also raised min payment to double former amount.
I called and told them no way.
Went back to orginial terms and card will close once we hit expiration date on cc.
def call.
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| Posted 2/12/09 10:27 AM |
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Ambersmom
Straight up nasty
Member since 5/05 7740 total posts
Name:
Sharon
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Re: Been looking on the MLS for other houses in the area for sale...
Melissa:
The problem is, EVERYONE knew this was going to happen a year or so ago. This is not some hidden secret; this has ben common knowledge (since early 2007) that the market has been on a decline. People on this site have been offering you financial advice and/or solutions for several years and you have continually made alternate (and sorry to say poor) choices. There's no sense crying foul now. You can't blame the overall economy for decisions you/your husband have made to make uncessary home upgrades, buy/replace video game systems, etc. EVERYONE should have been in the know about being conservative with spending for quite some time. I sincerely hope you can sell your home soon but unforunately you'll have to ride out the storm like everyone else.
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| Posted 2/12/09 10:27 AM |
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Ophelia
she's baaccckkkk ;)
Member since 5/06 23378 total posts
Name:
remember, when Gulliver traveled....
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Re: Been looking on the MLS for other houses in the area for sale...
Posted by CaidensMommy
Posted by Ophelia
have you reached out to ANY of your creditors?
they will work with you so that you don't go into default.
No, not yet... I was saving that for the last possible moment.
This just su@cks!!!
why would selling your house be before this???
TALK TO THEM NOW!
I cannot see myself selling my home and uprooting my family before exhausting EVERY possible option.
you need to take this thing HEAD on and kick it in the ***!!!
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| Posted 2/12/09 10:30 AM |
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Janice
Sweet Jessie Quinn
Member since 5/05 27567 total posts
Name:
Janice
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Re: Been looking on the MLS for other houses in the area for sale...
I agree. Its basically Ramen time if you are about to take a loss on your home to move into an apt.
I am in NC, my rent went up last year by 275!
Renting isn't going to be cheaper if your mortgage is reasonable.
I think you need to put in a hardcore year of budgeting for food and gas...nothing else.
good luck!
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| Posted 2/12/09 10:34 AM |
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babymakes3
Almost there!
Member since 7/06 7376 total posts
Name:
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Re: Been looking on the MLS for other houses in the area for sale...
Posted by Ophelia
Posted by CaidensMommy
Posted by Ophelia
have you reached out to ANY of your creditors?
they will work with you so that you don't go into default.
No, not yet... I was saving that for the last possible moment.
This just su@cks!!!
why would selling your house be before this???
TALK TO THEM NOW!
I cannot see myself selling my home and uprooting my family before exhausting EVERY possible option.
you need to take this thing HEAD on and kick it in the ***!!!
ITA!
Why wouldn't you call your creditors and ask? I posted on your other thread earlier this week about calling your CC companies and asking them to lower your payments/interest rate. That would be my 1st step if I had high minimum payments and interest rates!!
Real estate is a long-term investment. Stick with your house and don't think about it's current value in the market.
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| Posted 2/12/09 10:55 AM |
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CaidensMommy
My 3 Miracles!
Member since 5/05 5777 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: Been looking on the MLS for other houses in the area for sale...
Posted by Ambersmom
Melissa:
The problem is, EVERYONE knew this was going to happen a year or so ago. This is not some hidden secret; this has ben common knowledge (since early 2007) that the market has been on a decline. People on this site have been offering you financial advice and/or solutions for several years and you have continually made alternate (and sorry to say poor) choices. There's no sense crying foul now. You can't blame the overall economy for decisions you/your husband have made to make uncessary home upgrades, buy/replace video game systems, etc. EVERYONE should have been in the know about being conservative with spending for quite some time. I sincerely hope you can sell your home soon but unforunately you'll have to ride out the storm like everyone else.
I honestly have to say that I didn't know it was going to be this bad? I'm sure it will get worse. I don't follow all the news as closely as most people. I honestly hate watching the news. I knew there were problems here and there, but never really thought of things going the way they were. So yes, that's my fault for not following it I guess. I also didn't think it would hit us personally like a lot of people don't. I'm not just blaming the overall economy for our problems, just not being able to sell the house and some interest rates on our CC. I've also taken the advice that most people have suggested over the years, and some of it has worked and some of it has not. I didn't think the house upgrades were unnecessary considering at the time of doing them the market here in NC were mainly of houses that were new and all the older one's were already upgraded. I was just following what was the "norm" around here to just be able to get the house ready to sell. It's obvious now that the market has changed and changed for the worse for us and there is nothing I can do about it now. I didn't see the housing market going into this direction when the majority of the house work was done. It's not like we spent thousands and thousands of dollars upgrading the house, but it was a few thousand. We did the bare minimum to say the least. Also, the housing market in NY is completely different than here. At least for a while it was. I do remember seeing about the market up there going downhill a lot sooner than it did here. Probably about a year or so, but never thought it would affect it so much here. I thought the house was going to be on the market well before it hit here. It's still not as bad as NY, but it's getting there very quickly now.
I do regret some of the choices I've made over the last several years, but they were made with the best of intentions as far as I can remember. I do know however that my wonderful DH has made a few bad choices, even against my opinion and there was nothing I could have done about that. I've tried. All of the credit card debt we have accumulated, (yes it all stems from my DH losing his job a couple years ago), is not from frivilous purchases. All of it was just to live. To try to make it without ruining everything. Of course I regret using the cards that way, I wish we never did it, but at the time, we couldn't figure another way out. It was all we could do at the time. Then month after month, the balances grew and grew. I knew it was growing quickly, but like I said, we had no way out. We just could not catch up from earlier debt. So that brings us where we are today. I don't spend unnecessary money for the longest time. My DH on the other hand isn't trying as hard as me and I can't do anything about it. I'm trying to do the best I can right now to deal with what's on our plate. I am still so angry with DH about him losing his job (his fault) a couple of years ago, and then his 2nd job (again, his fault). He really hurt us financially and I truly believe most of our financial problems are because of that. He won't admit it of course. He hasn't bought games, or anything like that, but he can try a bit harder because every penny counts now a days.
So, as we stand now, I am so angry as to where the financial problems started and grew from, but I can't be mad as to what debt we've accumulated the past year or so. It was so we can eat, get to work, bills, clothes and shoes for the kids, etc. We didn't spend it on cr@p. I do hate where we are and there is nothing I can do about it now. I have to accept where we stand and hope we can make it out and also hope that my DH can realize not to let it happen again.
Message edited 2/12/2009 11:04:01 AM.
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| Posted 2/12/09 11:03 AM |
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Ophelia
she's baaccckkkk ;)
Member since 5/06 23378 total posts
Name:
remember, when Gulliver traveled....
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Re: Been looking on the MLS for other houses in the area for sale...
Posted by CaidensMommy
I honestly have to say that I didn't know it was going to be this bad? I'm sure it will get worse. I don't follow all the news as closely as most people. I honestly hate watching the news. I knew there were problems here and there, but never really thought of things going the way they were. So yes, that's my fault for not following it I guess. I also didn't think it would hit us personally like a lot of people don't. I'm not just blaming the overall economy for our problems, just not being able to sell the house and some interest rates on our CC. I've also taken the advice that most people have suggested over the years, and some of it has worked and some of it has not. I didn't think the house upgrades were unnecessary considering at the time of doing them the market here in NC were mainly of houses that were new and all the older one's were already upgraded. I was just following what was the "norm" around here to just be able to get the house ready to sell. It's obvious now that the market has changed and changed for the worse for us and there is nothing I can do about it now. I didn't see the housing market going into this direction when the majority of the house work was done. It's not like we spent thousands and thousands of dollars upgrading the house, but it was a few thousand. We did the bare minimum to say the least. Also, the housing market in NY is completely different than here. At least for a while it was. I do remember seeing about the market up there going downhill a lot sooner than it did here. Probably about a year or so, but never thought it would affect it so much here. I thought the house was going to be on the market well before it hit here. It's still not as bad as NY, but it's getting there very quickly now.
I do regret some of the choices I've made over the last several years, but they were made with the best of intentions as far as I can remember. I do know however that my wonderful DH has made a few bad choices, even against my opinion and there was nothing I could have done about that. I've tried. All of the credit card debt we have accumulated, (yes it all stems from my DH losing his job a couple years ago), is not from frivilous purchases. All of it was just to live. To try to make it without ruining everything. Of course I regret using the cards that way, I wish we never did it, but at the time, we couldn't figure another way out. It was all we could do at the time. Then month after month, the balances grew and grew. I knew it was growing quickly, but like I said, we had no way out. We just could not catch up from earlier debt. So that brings us where we are today. I don't spend unnecessary money for the longest time. My DH on the other hand isn't trying as hard as me and I can't do anything about it. I'm trying to do the best I can right now to deal with what's on our plate. I am still so angry with DH about him losing his job (his fault) a couple of years ago, and then his 2nd job (again, his fault). He really hurt us financially and I truly believe most of our financial problems are because of that. He won't admit it of course. He hasn't bought games, or anything like that, but he can try a bit harder because every penny counts now a days.
So, as we stand now, I am so angry as to where the financial problems started and grew from, but I can't be mad as to what debt we've accumulated the past year or so. It was so we can eat, get to work, bills, clothes and shoes for the kids, etc. We didn't spend it on cr@p. I do hate where we are and there is nothing I can do about it now. I have to accept where we stand and hope we can make it out and also hope that my DH can realize not to let it happen again.
I don't see a plan of action here.
I've seen some of your other posts and you just keep saying the same things.
you are wallowing.
you MUST stop.
you must DO something. more than just sit and sigh and lament the housing market.
people have given you REAL and I think, GREAT advice to try to dig yourself out.
but you are so focused now on selling your house, which would be a VERY UNINTELLIGENT move given the current conditions.
you have other roads you can do down. GET ON YOUR BOOTS and go down them.
really. make a PLAN and stick to it.
stop excusing what caused it and just FIX it.
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| Posted 2/12/09 11:11 AM |
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CaidensMommy
My 3 Miracles!
Member since 5/05 5777 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: Been looking on the MLS for other houses in the area for sale...
We do have a plan of action, well we did... I am working on it. I will be contacting the creditors and hopefully they'll work with me some what and it will relieve some stress. But, the house has to be sold either way whenever it does sell. We can't just sit here either if we can help it. We'll do what we can and hope that things will work out.
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| Posted 2/12/09 11:16 AM |
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Ophelia
she's baaccckkkk ;)
Member since 5/06 23378 total posts
Name:
remember, when Gulliver traveled....
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Re: Been looking on the MLS for other houses in the area for sale...
Posted by CaidensMommy
We do have a plan of action, well we did... I am working on it. I will be contacting the creditors and hopefully they'll work with me some what and it will relieve some stress. But, the house has to be sold either way whenever it does sell. We can't just sit here either if we can help it. We'll do what we can and hope that things will work out.
do you have anyone that can help you?
I don't mean this in a bad way at all, but you *sound* to me like you are too immersed and overwhelmed to carve out a clear path and really see your situation in the larger picture.
I get the feeling that you are a very laid back person, not used to fighting...put you HAVE to be extremely proactive and FIGHT.
I would really recommend having objective and knowledgable eyes look at your total financial situation and plotting your way out of the hole you are in.
good luck.
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| Posted 2/12/09 11:22 AM |
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ave1024
I Took The Wrong Road
Member since 12/07 6153 total posts
Name:
That Led To The Wrong Tendencies
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Re: Been looking on the MLS for other houses in the area for sale...
Posted by Ambersmom
Melissa:
The problem is, EVERYONE knew this was going to happen a year or so ago. This is not some hidden secret; this has ben common knowledge (since early 2007) that the market has been on a decline. People on this site have been offering you financial advice and/or solutions for several years and you have continually made alternate (and sorry to say poor) choices. There's no sense crying foul now. You can't blame the overall economy for decisions you/your husband have made to make uncessary home upgrades, buy/replace video game systems, etc. EVERYONE should have been in the know about being conservative with spending for quite some time. I sincerely hope you can sell your home soon but unforunately you'll have to ride out the storm like everyone else.
ITA with this post.
In fact the main reason why I registered on this website was to respond to one of Melissa's posts (my first post on LIF was a response to one of her threads).
It seems like every thread is the same story.  I am sort of at a loss for words right now.
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| Posted 2/12/09 11:36 AM |
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SpiceGirl
Dream big
Member since 1/06 2486 total posts
Name:
j
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Re: Been looking on the MLS for other houses in the area for sale...
Are you planning on renting an apartment when you sell the house? Are rentals that much cheaper than your current mortgage?
I know here in NY/LI...rent is not cheap.
Can you move in with family until you get on your feet? Are both you and your husband working now?
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| Posted 2/12/09 11:47 AM |
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CaidensMommy
My 3 Miracles!
Member since 5/05 5777 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: Been looking on the MLS for other houses in the area for sale...
Posted by SpiceGirl
Are you planning on renting an apartment when you sell the house? Are rentals that much cheaper than your current mortgage?
I know here in NY/LI...rent is not cheap.
Can you move in with family until you get on your feet? Are both you and your husband working now?
Yes, we are planning on renting an apartment afterwards. We can get a nice 2BR apt for $760 or a 3BR for $925.00 Between both our mortgages that alone is $700-$800 cheaper.
I wish we could move in with family, but our immediates families on both sides are having money problems as well.
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| Posted 2/12/09 12:02 PM |
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babymakes3
Almost there!
Member since 7/06 7376 total posts
Name:
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Re: Been looking on the MLS for other houses in the area for sale...
You are so dead set on selling your house. It's NOT going to sell. At least if you want to break even, it's not going to sell. Houses are sitting on the market for months and maybe even 1 year + now.
Set small goals for yourself. Your first one...call your creditors by the end of the day today.
Your second one, cut up the credit cards. It's a leap, but you'll get by without them.
Your third one, create a budget that both you and your DH have to stick to.
If your DH is the spending problem, he shouldn't be carrying any more cash than what he needs for the day.
Do you have a car loan? Can you refinance for a lower monthly payment?
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| Posted 2/12/09 12:06 PM |
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monkeybride
My Everything
Member since 5/05 20541 total posts
Name:
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Re: Been looking on the MLS for other houses in the area for sale...
I agree with Ambersmom completely. Sorry but anytime people offer advise you find reasons you can't follow through with their advise.
My advise. Got to the library and get Dave Ramsey's Total Money Makeover and stop making excuses. If you want out of debt you can do it. Stop focusing on selling your house unless you can afford a loss which you can't.
Cut out cable. Sell the video games for money. Sell anything and everything you don't absoultely need to raise some money. It won't be forever. One day you can afford to live and get things back but right now you have two children you need to think about.
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| Posted 2/12/09 12:30 PM |
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SpiceGirl
Dream big
Member since 1/06 2486 total posts
Name:
j
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Re: Been looking on the MLS for other houses in the area for sale...
Everyone is giving great advice. I know it's hard to hear, but it doesn't look like selling your house right now is an option. UNLESS you are willing to drastically lower your price...whcih you've already said you can't. The housing market is going to get a little worse before the healing begins.
Desperate times, call for desperate measures. Get a job...get 2 jobs. Hell, I have a friend working THREE jobs!
Believe me, I know it's frustrating. We're all being effected by this tanking economy it some way, shape, or form.
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| Posted 2/12/09 12:44 PM |
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Kara
Now Zagat Rated!
Member since 3/07 13217 total posts
Name:
They call me "Tater Salad"
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Re: Been looking on the MLS for other houses in the area for sale...
Posted by CaidensMommy
Posted by Ophelia
have you reached out to ANY of your creditors?
they will work with you so that you don't go into default.
No, not yet... I was saving that for the last possible moment.
This just su@cks!!!
DO NOT wait until the last possible moment to do ths. THIS is what gets people in trouble. You need to reach out IMMEDIATELY - as soon as you start having problems. Waiting is not going to help you. Please get proactive and call your creditors.
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| Posted 2/12/09 12:58 PM |
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Kara
Now Zagat Rated!
Member since 3/07 13217 total posts
Name:
They call me "Tater Salad"
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Re: Been looking on the MLS for other houses in the area for sale...
Posted by ave1024
Posted by Ambersmom
Melissa:
The problem is, EVERYONE knew this was going to happen a year or so ago. This is not some hidden secret; this has ben common knowledge (since early 2007) that the market has been on a decline. People on this site have been offering you financial advice and/or solutions for several years and you have continually made alternate (and sorry to say poor) choices. There's no sense crying foul now. You can't blame the overall economy for decisions you/your husband have made to make uncessary home upgrades, buy/replace video game systems, etc. EVERYONE should have been in the know about being conservative with spending for quite some time. I sincerely hope you can sell your home soon but unforunately you'll have to ride out the storm like everyone else.
ITA with this post.
In fact the main reason why I registered on this website was to respond to one of Melissa's posts (my first post on LIF was a response to one of her threads).
It seems like every thread is the same story. I am sort of at a loss for words right now.
I have to agree... and add that some of the more recent posts make me wonder how much effort the OP is really putting into her financial life.
She doesn't know how much her cable bill is and isn't willing to give up cable, despite the fact that she rarely watches tv... Well, if I were on the verge of bankruptcy, I think I would get rid of cable to save over $100/month.
These posts have been going on for LONG time and, quite frankly, it doesn't look like you WANT to help yourself. Until you get proactive and WANT to do something to help yourself, nothing will happen.
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| Posted 2/12/09 1:00 PM |
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Erica
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 11767 total posts
Name:
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Re: Been looking on the MLS for other houses in the area for sale...
Posted by Ambersmom
Melissa:
The problem is, EVERYONE knew this was going to happen a year or so ago. This is not some hidden secret; this has ben common knowledge (since early 2007) that the market has been on a decline. People on this site have been offering you financial advice and/or solutions for several years and you have continually made alternate (and sorry to say poor) choices. There's no sense crying foul now. You can't blame the overall economy for decisions you/your husband have made to make uncessary home upgrades, buy/replace video game systems, etc. EVERYONE should have been in the know about being conservative with spending for quite some time. I sincerely hope you can sell your home soon but unforunately you'll have to ride out the storm like everyone else.
I have to agree with Sharon as well. Melissa, you have been complaining about money since before you got married - 7 YEARS AGO! when the economy was doing OK. Your lifestyle needs to change.
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| Posted 2/12/09 1:16 PM |
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lullabella
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 2246 total posts
Name:
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Re: Been looking on the MLS for other houses in the area for sale...
I think you need to get all your bills, etc.... and sit down with a trusted family member or friend who is financially responsible and ask them for some guidance. You have been struggling so long... you really need some help. If you dont have anyone, I would contact a bankruptcy lawyer. I applaud you for not wanting to give up...but you are too emotional to make a rational decision...
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| Posted 2/12/09 1:55 PM |
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JldDolphin
Member since 1/07 6929 total posts
Name:
Jen
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Re: Been looking on the MLS for other houses in the area for sale...
Maybe you could check out this site. It says its free to use for a week.
Free Bankruptcy Forms
Check out this Google Search for consolidating your bills. You might be surprised that just consolidating your bills will help you out and you might not have to sell your house right now.
Consolidting Your Bills
Good Luck!
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| Posted 2/12/09 2:23 PM |
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