BTDT Moms of 2 or more kids (school & behavior related)

Jared has just started pre-school this month. His teacher says that he is doing well, but he is (in her words) "all over the place". She says that it might be that he senses that my little one is coming and just cannot focus.

My question to the BTDT moms is this:
Do kids really sense when the baby is coming?
or
Is this just a new experience (pre-school) and needs some time to adjust?

TIA

Re: BTDT Moms of 2 or more kids (school & behavior related)

For us Dee knew that Squishy was coming. She had to go through a lot of changes. We moved her to a 'big girl room' because I LOVED our nursery. The side of the car that her car seat was on got switched. The furniture in the living room was rearranged to accomodate the pack and play. I couldn't do a lot of the same things that I did with her because I was huge. She was all over the place with emotions about the baby. She had a really rough adjustment after Squishy came home. Now at 4 months she pretty much gets it and is back to be a great kid but she really gave me a run for my money.

Stefanie I think D and Squishy are going to be about the same age span as Jared and Nikolas. (3 years, mine are 3 years 3 weeks apart).

It's rough for them at 3 they are used to being the only one. Dee wigged out at school right after I had Squish because one of her teachers had a baby and the other teacher was telling the student's that Miss Lisa had a little girl and she threw a fit like her teacher had never seen. Emotionally she just didn't want to hear about the baby anymore.

Keep an eye on him, do you think he is acting any different?

Any other questions just FM me

Re: BTDT Moms of 2 or more kids (school & behavior related)

Re: BTDT Moms of 2 or more kids (school & behavior related)

Anyone else?

Re: BTDT Moms of 2 or more kids (school & behavior related)

I had them pretty close together & didn't tell ds that dd was coming until my last month.

I do know if it's a new place, there is definitely a settle down period.

Many kids go back to wanting to be a baby & it has nothing to do with an impending sibling.

I guess the question to ask her is by not focusing, is she suggesting ADD or ADHD?

Re: BTDT Moms of 2 or more kids (school & behavior related)

It might be the baby but honestly, how long is he in school? 2 weeks? I don't understand how a new teacher with a new child in a new environment can make a comment like that. Even when they are in elementary school, they give them more time to adjust before showing concern. Unless he being outwardly aggressive in a way that will harm other kids, I'm not sure it should be alarming at this point. He's 3, right? I don't how she said it exactly but if she said it to you in a "you should be worried about this" kind of way, I think it's a little early for that. JMO

Re: BTDT Moms of 2 or more kids (school & behavior related)

Re: BTDT Moms of 2 or more kids (school & behavior related)

My girls are 2 weeks shy of being 3 years apart.

The only behavior issue I see with Hayley is sometimes I have to ask her to do something 3 times before she actually does it. As far as how she is w/Lindsay, she is good so far.

He has only been in school 4 days, she can't possibly know what kind of kid he is in that short time frame. Now once the baby comes if he is acting differently she could assume that because he would have been in school a month.

Re: BTDT Moms of 2 or more kids (school & behavior related)

Stef, Julia started to get really out of hand just before Todd Jr was born too, I noticed I was yelling at her more and her listening skills went right out the door, it continued to stay like that for like a month after Todd Jr was born, but then she started to get use to having a new baby in the house, and became my" big helper" and then everything went back to normal and Julia started to listen and behave much better again.

Give him sometime to get use to it all.....

ETA: Julia also wanted me to treat her like a baby, but not until Todd was born, she wanted me to say baby things to her like I do with Todd and wanted me to hold her in my arms again like you would with a baby, she also wanted to sit in his exersaucer and in his swing.......its totally normal, and Jared will adjust once the baby is here.

Message edited 9/17/2008 10:33:25 AM.

Re: BTDT Moms of 2 or more kids (school & behavior related)

Re: BTDT Moms of 2 or more kids (school & behavior related)

I think it's a combination of the two.

My DD1 definetly knew something was going on before I had DD2.

I also think that pre school is new to him and he just may be excited about it. DD1 started a new class within her daycare and was all over the place - acting out - Just not her usual self.

I say give him some time to adjust - Especially after the new baby comes along.

Re: BTDT Moms of 2 or more kids (school & behavior related)

4 days Stef are you kidding? You are a teacher, I am a teacher I doubt we would EVER make statements like that in the first 4 days of knowing a child.

Everything you stated that Jared is doing is exactly what Dee did and still does. She will not even let people say that she is a big sister, she is Squishy's cowboy. Not even cowgirl

I would keep an eye out as to what you see. If she is still seeing the same thing a month from now then MAYBE I would lend some merit to it but with Nikolas coming I would not even concern myself with it until after the holidays and let Jared settle in.

Re: BTDT Moms of 2 or more kids (school & behavior related)

I always think it depends on the kid. If this is his first experience with school then I think that has a lot to do with it. There is a lot of transition from activity to activity that sometimes kids find hard.

I'm not sure how old your little one is but if he's four, then he might be aware that there are some changes going on. My two year old was a little bonkers while we were getting things ready for the new baby.

I personally think it's more the adjustment to school. I'm sure he'll adjust. I know that she's a teacher but she's not a child psycologist.

Re: BTDT Moms of 2 or more kids (school & behavior related)

My DD was super calm before DS came. She knew he was coming but she didn't "act up" or whatever all the experts say happens when another sibling is on the way. But, when she started preschool, the same thing happened with her. The first day I picked her up, the director said she is really"headstrong" and "very active". I think it was just her adjusting to being in a new environment and with new rules, etc.

Re: BTDT Moms of 2 or more kids (school & behavior related)

Message edited 9/17/2008 12:13:15 PM.