Do you think parents should have to help pay for college?

I know some people believe that they owe their children a place to live and food/medical/basic clothing until 18 then they are on their own, I even went to school with a girl whose parents believed that she needed to work the max. amount of hours allowed by law starting at age 14 and she had to pay for ALL clothing and other expenses (even school supplies) except for basic home (like food) and medical stuff.
I know others whose parents felt they did not need to work until after College and paid for everything from a car to great clothes every year to monthly money in their accounts and came out of school with no college loans.
What are your thoughts?

For me: My children will work as teenagers because I think it is good to learn about hard work and saving their money. But we are going to do our best to provide them with a college education with them maybe paying for book and bar money (LOL). Since I graduation riddled with college loans I truly do not want my children to start out their lives in that kind of debt so we are committed to helping them pay for their education. I want a balance between giving and them learning the value of money.

What about you?

Re: Do you think parents should have to help pay for college?

I always worked- starting from early in high school or whenever I could get working papers so I always had some spending money and money put away...

But my parents paid for college and I always knew the value of a dollar...

I hope my kids will be the same and we will definitely be paying for their education...

Re: Do you think parents should have to help pay for college?

We do want to put aside some money for DS to go to college one day (if that's what he will do) or to help him learn a trade. It would be a state school--if he wants a private college, we'll tell him we can pay this much, you need to come up with the rest. If he decides to get a masters or Ph.D., he will pay for that--I think a bachelors is enough, and we will have our own retirement to plan too.

I wouldn't cast him out of the house the day he turns 18, but I would expect him to have a job and help out around the house so he can take care of himself when he's on his own. I don't want him living in our basement at 40 either though, so when to ask him to go out on his own if he doesn't do it himself would be tricky. Both my sister and I left at reasonable ages, so my parents never had to brooch this with us.

Re: Do you think parents should have to help pay for college?

I have already started a college fund for my 10 month old, so yes I suppose I do believe that I should pay for DSs education. College will be hundreds of thousands for a good private/Ivy league school by the time he graduates, and I cannot see making a child go into such debt before they are even working f/t. If he is so inclined to get a post-grad degree...that is another story.

As for clothing, cars, etc. I believe at a certain age the responsibility should be shared.

Re: Do you think parents should have to help pay for college?

I think it is good to have the kids work. It teaches them responsibility, respect, and accountability.

I would love to be able to pay for their bachelors, just like my parents did for me. My DH & I both know what it's like to have school loans, so I'd hate for them to have them. We will do as much as we can for them.

Re: Do you think parents should have to help pay for college?

If my kids want spending $$$, they will have to get a job, whether it be delivering papers or working at CVS.....
I worked from 14 on, AND I maintained a very good GPA....and sometimes had 2 jobs, my kids will not be strangers to working.....

As far as college, I am hoping they will get scholarships..... , but otherwise, I think we should split the costs as best we can afford, but based on grades, that will determine what they will receive from me.
There's no way I'm sending my kids to college so they can party all my $$ away and pull Ds....

IMHO, paying for your own things makes you appreciate them more, I know I wish I didn't have $30k in loans, but it makes me appreciate the hard work I put in.

ETA
We have started a 529, so hopefully that will cover a lot.....hopefully!!!!

Message edited 4/21/2008 3:12:51 PM.

Re: Do you think parents should have to help pay for college?

I don't think that parents should have to help with college tuition but I do think that it's a very nice thing if they do.

DH and I had student loans after graduating...best debt I ever had and worth every penny of it. Yes it would have been great to not have it but we made smart decisions and were never burdened by it. When we sold our co-op we paid off all of our loans...cars and college and that was about 6 years out of school.

Personally, I know the burden of doing well in school was completely on my shoulders because I had scholarships to maintain a GPA for and the rest came out of pocket...failure would mean a hit to my wallet. It also pushed me to become a RA to help minimize my bill and that in turn was a great thing for my resume. Not to say that someone that had their tuition covered by their parents would not work as hard...it's just that for ME I know this had a greater weight. I took my successes and failures more personally.

We intent for our children to take out loans while they are in school. We will try our best to help out but we will not let them know that until the end.

Re: Do you think parents should have to help pay for college?

My parents put all 6 of us through 4 year colleges - all private ones to boot! I know they value education and it was more important to them for us to do well in school than to earn a few $ from a side job. They sacrificed a lot and each one of us did well (if I do say so for myself ).

To answer your question, we have already been saving every month for their college education and will make sure they go to college and not have to worry themselves about money.

ETA: I had school loans too, and while I look back and hated that I had to pay them off, I think my education and degrees were well worth it.

Message edited 4/21/2008 3:11:50 PM.

Re: Do you think parents should have to help pay for college?

I like the way my parents did it. They always told us we could go to any college we wanted, and they would pay for it. They really value education. I worked summers in high school, but not during the school year. My parents felt that school was my 'job' and it was my job to do well. I also played sports year round, so there wasn't really time to work anyway.

I would like to do that for DS as well. If he does not do any other after school activities, then I would like him to work, otherwise he shouldn't have to.

Re: Do you think parents should have to help pay for college?

I don't think parents "should' have to pay for education if they don't want to, but for me, yes I would like to provide my children with higher education. I plan on having my children have high school jobs too though.

Re: Do you think parents should have to help pay for college?

We already have a bank account for my DD college education that is getting bulked up from donations from family gifts for all occasions.

My sister also has an account for her since she is her Godmother. Instead of giving her gifts, she put a certain amount in her account.

She should be ok for college but I am still hoping for that full ride

Re: Do you think parents should have to help pay for college?

Re: Do you think parents should have to help pay for college?

My children will work when they are teenagers, but my DH and I will pay for there college education, I can't see them working full time and trying to pay to go to college.

Re: Do you think parents should have to help pay for college?

I worked from age 15 on (babysitting prior to that too) and I thought it taught me alot of responsibility. My parents paid for some of my college, I took loans and they took loans. I'm paying them back b/c if I didn't they would never be able to retire putting three kids through school. I honestly don't mind it. I want my parents to enjoy the rest of their life.

I will help my children as much as possible, we have started a 529 for DD and will start one for DS when he is born. They can always take student loans, but you can't take a loan to retire!!

Re: Do you think parents should have to help pay for college?

I always worked since I was 14, I had to pay for my own clothes, etc. My parents didn't pay for college. I moved out on my own at 18. I applied for grants, etc., but didn't qualify since I had to use my parents income, even though I didn't live with them.

I think it's nice if parents will pay for it, but I don't think it's realistic for everyone. If I have the money to pay for my kids education, I will, if not, I hope they grow up to be smarties so they can get some scholarships

I also don't believe in *making* your kids go to college.

Re: Do you think parents should have to help pay for college?

I don't think parents SHOULD HAVE TO help pay for college.

My parents paid for my undergraduate degrees AND my graduate degrees.

They did not feel they owed it to me - it was something that they felt was important and something that they wanted to do for me. They only asked that I kept my average up while I was in school.

I did work (starting at 17) - but the fact was that no matter HOW much I saved, scrimped and pimped myself - I would never have been able to afford to go to school without enormous debt.

Although I may have taken my parents generosity for granted at times, I never EVER felt that they OWED me an education by any stretch.

Now that I am out of school and have never had to deal with college debt, I am more grateful than I can ever express.

I hope that I will be able to do the same for my children.

ETA: With regard to other expenses, I paid for my own clothes and toiletries. My parents bought me my first (and second) cars - but I paid for insurance, gas, maintenance, etc.

I was very fortunate - but I don't think I was spoiled.

Message edited 4/21/2008 3:47:11 PM.

Re: Do you think parents should have to help pay for college?

I always worked....babysiting, Key Food, waitressed, telemarketed, clothing store

BUT my parents paid for college and gave me free reign of where I wanted to go

I was on an academic scholarship--so that absorbed some cost

Law school I paid for---I guess I want DS to have school paid for by me, but for spending $$$ he will be on his own

Re: Do you think parents should have to help pay for college?

Re: Do you think parents should have to help pay for college?

I don't think parents should have to pay for college.

I plan to, but my boys will work and they will not get everything handed to them. I worked and bought my own stuff from about 15 on, but I was sent to college. I had to buy my own car and pay my own insurance.

Re: Do you think parents should have to help pay for college?

Re: Do you think parents should have to help pay for college?

what I think is unfair is that the federal gov't uses your parent's income as a basis for YOUR student aid, even if your parents decline to give you one penny. If your parents have $1M in the bank but say you have to figure out college on your own then you get no aid even though no one is helping you. That IMO is very unfair.

Re: Do you think parents should have to help pay for college?

Re: Do you think parents should have to help pay for college?

Should they have to? No. Will we? To the best of our ability. I consider paying it forward - our parents did for us - we will do for our kids. That being said, we are in a 100% completely different economical bracket than our parents were when they raised us and there is no way we can do what they did for us.

None of the 4 of us kids (my siblings)ever worked to pay for college. Between the 4 of us, there are 4 undergraduate degrees, 2 masters degrees and one law degree without so much as one loan. We were EXTREMELY fortunate and very grateful for what our parents were able to provide for us.

I think it would only be fair to our children to let them know what their obligations will be when as they approach the age of attending college. They can either take loans, do work study or develop another kind of plan. It is a means to an end.

I also think it truly depends on the individual child. I know for myself, I could never have worked and gone to school at the same time. I lacked the discipline and organization to balance a job and devote time to my studies. I was simply not that focused. There would have been NO point inme working if my grades would have been sacrificed due to work obligations. I would have had to suck it up and take loans to make it work.

Re: Do you think parents should have to help pay for college?

Re: Do you think parents should have to help pay for college?

Yes I do think that parents should help pay for it. I actually feel that they should pay for it all.