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Do you think this saying is true, If you have a nervous personality, your kids will have a nervous personality?

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Goobster
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Re: Do you think this saying is true, If you have a nervous personality, your kids will have a nervous personality?

Posted by aliwnec10

Posted by Goobster

No, i know plenty of people who are nervous when their parents are not, or vice versa.



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In addition, I wanted to add that moreso than nervousness being learned, I also think there is a genetic component in cases where the family is also "nervous".

Posted 10/21/09 9:23 AM
 
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nrthshgrl
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Member since 7/05

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Re: Do you think this saying is true, If you have a nervous personality, your kids will have a nervous personality?

I think much of a parent's personality rubs off on a child to some extent - but particularly with nervousness I believe it is true.

I think children take cues on being fearful/nervous from their parents. Maybe later in adulthood, they can recognize it & work on changing that behavior, but for children...yes definitely.

I don't have experience with anxiety disorders, which can be masked as nervousness - but I would think that is genetic.

Message edited 10/21/2009 9:56:49 AM.

Posted 10/21/09 9:55 AM
 

Mommy2Boys
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Re: Do you think this saying is true, If you have a nervous personality, your kids will have a nervous personality?

Posted by Ang-Rich

I think that our children learn some behaviors from us and this could be one...they could take it on as their own or go the opposite way.




I agree with this as well.

My anxiety started when I was 8 with OCD...I washed my hands excessively until they were raw and bleeding. Obviously not something my parents taught me or I saw them doing. Not something I learned anywhere. It's part of the disorder.

Because I am a germ phobe (another part of my OCD Chat Icon ) I taught DS to wash his hands after school, before lunch, after the playground, etc. Sometimes he'll ask to wash his hands if they feel dirty to him. DH is upset b/c he thinks I am am turning him into me. IMO, you can't teach a child to have OCD or an anxiety disorder but you can help them to learn habits that they may not have picked up on their own.

DS thanksfully is a very calm child. But god forbid he develop an anxiety disorder (which I pray he doesnt b/c it is a lifetime struggle) I would at least know how to help him and get him the proper treatment where it was not something my parents knew how to deal with all the time when I was growing up. I did strange things and they didnt understand why. To this day when I get super nervous or anxious, they say "what do you have to be nervous about? you have a beautiful family, healthy kids" blah blah blah Chat Icon They still find it hard to understand my anxiety and OCD and I am 29.

Posted 10/21/09 10:02 AM
 

Angel321
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Member since 4/08

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Re: Do you think this saying is true, If you have a nervous personality, your kids will have a nervous personality?

Posted by pickles16

I believe it! I totally think a child can feed off your energy...



yes, 100%. i have worked VERY hard to be more laid back like dave....because of this reason!

Posted 10/21/09 10:09 AM
 

Hofstra26
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Member since 7/06

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Re: Do you think this saying is true, If you have a nervous personality, your kids will have a nervous personality?

I think your child (as a baby especially) can pick up on your behaviors and personality and if you're relaxed and chill I think that puts them more at ease. My DH and I are pretty relaxed and easy going and I have to say...........my DD is the EASIEST baby I've ever seen and I'm not just saying that because I am her mom. She never cries, has always been a good eater, started STTN at 8 weeks, and is very happy and relaxed all the time. I would like to think that aside from being blessed (Chat Icon Chat Icon) she also picked up a little of our personalities too! Chat Icon If nothing else it can only be a plus to not be a "nervous nelly" mommy. Chat Icon

Posted 10/21/09 10:24 AM
 
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