family comments on eval

So DS is almost done with his cpse eval and he is getting the same response from all the providers... seems like ASD and I agree.

My sister has downs syndrome and is very independent, works two jobs, has a serious BF, etc.

I call my mom to tell her the results of FBA and she tells me I have it better then she did.

I try to tell her that there shouldn't be any comparing. No one is worse or better off. She said at least people look at him and think he is typical... she has no idea how hard it is to deal with a kid who is inconsolable at times and can't tell you why. Or that his preschool teachers let him do whatever he wants because it is too hard to get him to cooperate.

How dare she disregard my feelings and continue to tell me i have it better....

I am a social worker and tried to explain that it hurts me when she says stuff like that because it discounts my feelings and experiences and she just keeps saying..."that's just how I feel..." I am going to lose it on her and don't want to do that. Though she is being a jerk she is still my mom and I need her...

sorry, needed to vent!

Re: family comments on eval

I don't get the comparison game either.

Obviously there are people who always are in worse situations, but there are some things that are better left unsaid.

I think when you are first dealing with it, regardless of whatever "it" is, it's still challenging and stressful for most parents.

As an aside, I'm also a social worker and have worked primarily with adults with disabilities for many years and also see this exchange between many of them.

I think it often comes down to personality, fear of not having resources, whoa is me feelings and overall just plain anger.

I would give your mom a pass if you can though.

I know things have gotten a lot better over the years for people with disabilities and I'm sure it wasn't always that way.

I also still think not everyone always has the same kind of access to support but that is certainly a different discussion.

Re: family comments on eval

Posted by MorningCuppaCoffee

I would give your mom a pass if you can though.

I know things have gotten a lot better over the years for people with disabilities and I'm sure it wasn't always that way.

I also still think not everyone always has the same kind of access to support but that is certainly a different discussion.