Getting ready to start 2nd fresh IVF cycle

If we are not pg naturally this month, which I am 99% sure we are not, we will start our 2nd fresh cycle. After one failed fresh and one failed frozen we took a few months to try the old fashioned way...all failed too. The problem I am having is feeling defeated before we start. I feel like there is no way it will work so why bother? We are using a diff RE (for ins reasons) with a slightly diff protocol but I still feel like it Is just not going to happen. Has anyone experienced similar thoughts/feelings? Thanks for listening...trying to find hope.

Message edited 3/11/2013 12:00:44 PM.

Re: Getting ready to start 2nd fresh IVF cycle

First of all I think most of us have felt defeated in one way or another. We are all on this board for a reason unfortunately. Try not to get too discouraged (hello pot meet kettle ) you never know when it's going to happen and that's the truth. Just gotta have a little faith. Positivity goes a long way. I am trying myself to keep that positivity as I wait out my 3rd IUI. IVF is not an option for us(money reasons) so I am putting my eggs in the IUI basket. It stinks but all we can do is hope for the best right? Just know you are not alone in this! Good luck and maybe this month is your month and you won't even have to go further!!

Re: Getting ready to start 2nd fresh IVF cycle

I know exactly how you feel! I had a breakdown a couple of months ago because I was so sure my IVF cycle did not work. That was the month I got my BFP but before I saw the second line I was ready to give up on this journey and was sure something was wrong with my uterus.

Positive thoughts and

Re: Getting ready to start 2nd fresh IVF cycle

Thank you both for your responses. For the past year I've kept positive and I didn't even have to try, I just was. This is the first time I'm feeling this way and I don't really know what to do to turn myself around. I'm sorry to hear you've had similar experiences but I do find comfort in hearing how you got/are getting through. Your stories of hope are uplifting. I wouldn't wish this journey on my worst enemy. Lots of to all of you.

Message edited 3/11/2013 12:01:50 PM.

Re: Getting ready to start 2nd fresh IVF cycle

I am not one who likes to gamble. On my first cruise, I went into the casino with $5 and told my dh if I lost it, I was walking out. Well, I lost the first $2 and said it was enough for me. I left and felt like I was technically $3 ahead

The point is .. I hate hate hate risk taking ... and that's what this is all about. No cycle is a guarantee and you're gambling money, emotions, risks of injecting your body with more drugs, etc etc .. It's so draining...

I just always told myself that if I don't do this, I probably won't have children. If I do, I at least have a chance. Of course I run the risk of a bfn ... or a loss .. but being childless is just not ok for me and that's a guarantee.


I think the best way is to just not think too much. It will work or it won't ... but just try not to over think things. You've done this before......... just roll with it. That's what I did my last IVF cycle and I called it my "stress less" cycle. I went to my appts without expectations and figured whatever will be.... At the point of that IVF cycle I had been so emotionally tapped out anyway, that going through the cycle felt routine and pretty robotic- and hey.. it worked!

Re: Getting ready to start 2nd fresh IVF cycle

I think anyone who has gone through IVF (or any IF treatment for that matter) has experienced the feeling of defeat before even starting. You are definitely not alone. I remember it all too well when I was doing my IVF cycle 3 years ago. I felt like I was unsing my "Trump card" so to speak....and that if THIS didn't work then nothing will. Its all part of emotional toll that IF takes on you and its totally normal.
You have to try your hardest to NOT think of the "what if's" too much....I remember that was driving me nutso Also if you can find something that helps you relax....yoga, reading, exercise, anything. I would often drive along the beach on the way home from work and that always helped to calm me.
Wishing you the very best of luck

Message edited 3/11/2013 2:37:25 PM.

Re: Getting ready to start 2nd fresh IVF cycle

I'm so sorry you are feeling this way It is so hard not to feel defeated, or hopeless, or broken. I'm sure most of us have felt that way at one time or another. I know I have, several times I know it erks me when people tell me "don't think about it" "don't worry" "it WILL happen"...etc. Its hard to find positivity in this IF journey!! I did feel the same way before this last IUI (#5)...why bother. But I did it because I have hope that something we do will work.

For me, I love reading the boards and hearing the success stories. That gives me hope! I vent, and post on the boards all the time and that has been an incredible support for me. I also found myself a hobby, and believe it or not it does take my mind off things ... for a second A good book also helps me.

Best of luck to you!!!!!

Re: Getting ready to start 2nd fresh IVF cycle

Posted by Daisy32

I think anyone who has gone through IVF (or any IF treatment for that matter) has experienced the feeling of defeat before even starting. You are definitely not alone. I remember it all too well when I was doing my IVF cycle 3 years ago. I felt like I was unsing my "Trump card" so to speak....and that if THIS didn't work then nothing will. Its all part of emotional toll that IF takes on you and its totally normal.
You have to try your hardest to NOT think of the "what if's" too much....I remember that was driving me nutso Also if you can find something that helps you relax....yoga, reading, exercise, anything. I would often drive along the beach on the way home from work and that always helped to calm me.
Wishing you the very best of luck

Re: Getting ready to start 2nd fresh IVF cycle

Thank you again ladies...I will be notebooking this thread to refer to for your positivity when it gets tough. I'm waiting on cd1 now (confirmed bfn) and then will begin the fresh cycle. I can't say my feeling have changed - but it mostly comes from the fact that I keep being told there is nothing wrong with me and no explanation for no implantation (we are dealing with mfi). I almost wish I had a dx so we could correct it and move on with more confidence. Here's hoping the other cycles were just some more bad luck and there's good luck coming our way...

Re: Getting ready to start 2nd fresh IVF cycle

Best of luck to you