How do you explain "death" to a child?

Both of my daughter's water frogs jumped the tank and wandered downstairs last night and today. Both died. She wasn't home, so she doesn't know (she'll be home Sunday). How do I explain it to them that they died? Or do I lie and tell her that they went back to the store because they missed their friends?

Re: How do you explain "death" to a child?

Not that I have any real advice since I have never had to go through this yet, but death is something a child should know about when they are at the age to understand it. My Grandma and Grandpa's dog Snipe died when I was very little- maybe 3 years old. My mom had told me that Snipe went to Heaven and explained it so that I could understand that this is something that happens in life. I can't remember it all obviously, but it was a simple explanation. What is funny as an aside, is that I thought she said that Snipe went to Evan's house (I had a friend in Pre-school named Evan)-

I grew up next to a family that never really explained death to the kids. They had a VERY hard time dealing with it when their family dog died when the kids were about 6 or 7 since they were told this happens and it's a normal part of life. I think not telling her is the wrong thing.

Re: How do you explain "death" to a child?

there is a great book by leo Buscaglia called The Fall of Freddie the leaf...its sooo sweet and its about a bunch of leaf friends that fall off the tree one by one....such a great book..

Re: How do you explain "death" to a child?

I went to see john edwards last sunday, and someone had asked him this question and this is what he said he told his son:

Take an empty glass and fill with water. The glass is the person and the water is the soul. Put the glass on a window sill and have the child check the water every day and they will see the water level going down. This is when you explain to the child that the water is evaporating into the air, and where is air? Air is all around us. Therefore the person soul is all around us all the time.

Not sure if im explaining like he did, but it was a sweet way of explaining death to a child in my opinion.

Re: How do you explain "death" to a child?

There is a great book I read to my 2nd graders when when a classmate's mother died. It was called "When Dinosaurs Die" It was excellent at explaining what happens when you die and how you may feel after a person has passed on. The illustrations are cute and the message that is brings across to the kids is great.

Re: How do you explain "death" to a child?

Re: How do you explain "death" to a child?

I have no idea. Last year, my BIL passed away. He was 32 years old. I had NO idea how to explain to my then 3 year old where his Uncle went. We read books, we tried to explain it as best we could saying that he was sick and his body was broken.

Its not easy at all.

Regarding the frogs though, I might just tell her that they ran away, or went back to find their friends or something along those lines.

Re: How do you explain "death" to a child?

well my mom passed away before Bryan was born and I want him to know about his grandma so I always show pictures and tell him that she is in heaven and she is an angel watching over him and that she was sick, couldnt get better and had to rest with god.
Bryan is 2.5 and he is just starting to somewhat "get it"

Re: How do you explain "death" to a child?

I am not sure how old Amber is but I would be honest. I don't think its ever correct to lie to a child, even it saves their feelings in the short term. I would explain what happened in very simple terms- they jumped from the tank and couldn't live without their water so they died. I think the death of pets is really helpful in the start of understanding what happens when we die. Its an upsetting part of life but one that happens eventually. Its not something we should shield our children from.