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how much for an engagement party gift?

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Kara
Now Zagat Rated!

Member since 3/07

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They call me "Tater Salad"

how much for an engagement party gift?

Sorry this is SWR...

A good friend is having an engagment party this month, and I'm in the wedding. I know they want $ as a gift, as they're trying to save for the wedding. I've honestly never been to an engagement party before.

I'm just trying to figure out what is appropriate. Is half of what we would give them as a wedding gift appropriate? (We'd be giving a generous wedding gift)

I'm trying to keep it all relative b/c I know people can afford different things...

Posted 9/6/07 5:19 PM
 
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imthecindyofcindyandkevin
Four-nado

Member since 8/07

7972 total posts

Name:
Cindy

Re: how much for an engagement party gift?

I would think that's a good idea, to give half of what you'd give at their wedding.

Or see if they've registered for anything yet and maybe get them something from there. Or something specifically for the wedding, like their toasting flutes.

Posted 9/6/07 5:44 PM
 

DancinBarefoot
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Member since 1/07

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The One My Mother Gave Me ;-)

Re: how much for an engagement party gift?

I don't give cash at an engagement party under any circumstances. E-parties are traditionally for the bride and groom's families to meet. This whole big party thing is IMHO an excuse to get gifts. If you feel you must give something, get something from the registry that will be used at the wedding like Cindy suggested.

Posted 9/6/07 6:20 PM
 

mrswask
Pookie Love

Member since 5/05

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Name:
Michal

Re: how much for an engagement party gift?

I have not been to that many engagement parties, but I've never given cash - I feel that a gift from their registry is more appropriate.

Posted 9/6/07 6:22 PM
 

NASP09
...

Member since 6/05

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Re:

Message edited 3/3/2010 7:54:01 PM.

Posted 9/6/07 6:24 PM
 

CathyB

Member since 5/05

19403 total posts

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Re: how much for an engagement party gift?

sorry for the hijack, but do you think something like this is ok for an engagement party next month, even if it will say 2008 since they aren't getting married until May?

External Image

Posted 9/6/07 6:36 PM
 

NASP09
...

Member since 6/05

6030 total posts

Name:

Re:

Message edited 3/3/2010 7:52:59 PM.

Posted 9/6/07 7:31 PM
 

SweetestOfPeas
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Member since 3/06

32345 total posts

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Re: how much for an engagement party gift?

Posted by kbeana24

I think that plaque is a really cute idea. I would have loved to receive something like that

me too!

eta: here's where you can get one

Message edited 9/6/2007 7:35:27 PM.

Posted 9/6/07 7:33 PM
 

Mommy2Boys
My Boys!!!!

Member since 6/06

14437 total posts

Name:
C

Re: how much for an engagement party gift?

I am going to one to for my friend. I asked if they are registering, she said no, so I assume that means that want money.

Message edited 9/6/2007 9:49:42 PM.

Posted 9/6/07 9:49 PM
 

lucyloo
nope

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Re: how much for an engagement party gift?

I think 1/2 of what you would give at the wedding is appropriate. That's what I do if it's a formal party.
If it's a backyard deal I usually give less than that.

Posted 9/6/07 10:35 PM
 

evnme
My little lamb

Member since 8/05

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Name:
aka momma2b

Re: how much for an engagement party gift?

i would get something from their registry...

Posted 9/6/07 10:37 PM
 

MrsO
Big Brothers to Be

Member since 1/07

4521 total posts

Name:
Maureen

Re: how much for an engagement party gift?

I don't think cash is appropriate for an engagement gift. I would give something off the registry or something personal. I think something special to help them remember this exciting time. Photoalbums, frames, planning books, etc

Posted 9/6/07 11:41 PM
 

Shorty
.

Member since 5/05

30390 total posts

Name:
really

Re: how much for an engagement party gift?

The avg gift at mine was $50/couple....my family, BP and boss were more generous. BP gift was about 100/couple.

Posted 9/6/07 11:44 PM
 

angnick
Life is So Wonderful!

Member since 8/06

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Name:
Angela

Re: how much for an engagement party gift?

Most of the time at the e party the couple is not engaged.

Depending on what i feel the couple needs, that is what we give. but most of the time, we give cash, cause hey, most couples now a days are paying for some if not all of there wedding and they NEED The cash for their wedding!!!

I save the gifts for the shower.

Posted 9/7/07 8:07 AM
 

Kara
Now Zagat Rated!

Member since 3/07

13217 total posts

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They call me "Tater Salad"

Re: how much for an engagement party gift?

Posted by DancinBarefoot

I don't give cash at an engagement party under any circumstances. E-parties are traditionally for the bride and groom's families to meet. This whole big party thing is IMHO an excuse to get gifts. If you feel you must give something, get something from the registry that will be used at the wedding like Cindy suggested.



Trust me, I'm 100% anti-engagement party for the exact same reason I'd never go if I weren't in the wedding party. We didn't want one and didn't have one - and we were very upfront with DH's parents about why we didn't want one. (We were also only engaged 9 months, so it's different than people who are engaged longer than a year)

They aren't registered because the wedding's a year and a half away at least. She's one of my best friends. They don't have a lot of money and I know they need this more than anything else I'd pick out... so I just figured I'd suck it up and give them what I'd spend on a gift in cash since I know it's what they want.

Message edited 9/7/2007 8:15:28 AM.

Posted 9/7/07 8:12 AM
 

Kara
Now Zagat Rated!

Member since 3/07

13217 total posts

Name:
They call me "Tater Salad"

Re: how much for an engagement party gift?

Posted by angnick

Most of the time at the e party the couple is not engaged.




Huh? Chat Icon

Posted 9/7/07 8:13 AM
 

Kara
Now Zagat Rated!

Member since 3/07

13217 total posts

Name:
They call me "Tater Salad"

Re: how much for an engagement party gift?

Posted by Shorty

The avg gift at mine was $50/couple....my family, BP and boss were more generous. BP gift was about 100/couple.



Thank you. That's very helpful!! Chat Icon

Posted 9/7/07 8:14 AM
 

Shorty
.

Member since 5/05

30390 total posts

Name:
really

Re: how much for an engagement party gift?

Posted by Kara

Posted by angnick

Most of the time at the e party the couple is not engaged.




Huh? Chat Icon



lol - I'm sure she meant "registered"

I REALLY love the plaque....I want one!!

Posted 9/7/07 8:17 AM
 

Kara
Now Zagat Rated!

Member since 3/07

13217 total posts

Name:
They call me "Tater Salad"

Re: how much for an engagement party gift?

Posted by SweetestOfPeas

Posted by kbeana24

I think that plaque is a really cute idea. I would have loved to receive something like that

me too!

eta: here's where you can get one



I love the plaque and might get it for myself and DH. Chat Icon

I would get her something like this, but they haven't set a date yet. Since they're looking at a winter wedding, I am afraid to guess the year, though it's likely '09.

Posted 9/7/07 8:17 AM
 

Kara
Now Zagat Rated!

Member since 3/07

13217 total posts

Name:
They call me "Tater Salad"

Re: how much for an engagement party gift?

Posted by Shorty

Posted by Kara

Posted by angnick

Most of the time at the e party the couple is not engaged.




Huh? Chat Icon



lol - I'm sure she meant "registered"

I REALLY love the plaque....I want one!!



Ahhh! Thanks. I knew it was just a typo, but wasn't sure what she meant.

They are not registered yet. The wedding date is too far away - and not even set yet.

Posted 9/7/07 8:18 AM
 

Kara
Now Zagat Rated!

Member since 3/07

13217 total posts

Name:
They call me "Tater Salad"

Re: how much for an engagement party gift?

Posted by dita

I think 1/2 of what you would give at the wedding is appropriate. That's what I do if it's a formal party.
If it's a backyard deal I usually give less than that.



It's at a firehouse. The groom-to-be's parents are hosting.

Posted 9/7/07 8:20 AM
 

tabrtm
LIF Adult

Member since 10/06

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Re: how much for an engagement party gift?

I think I would give $75.

Posted 9/7/07 10:22 AM
 

MsMBV
:P

Member since 5/05

28602 total posts

Name:
Me

Re: how much for an engagement party gift?

Last engagement party I went to that I was in the BP we gave $250. I knew the B&G were paying themselves, and I knew they could use the help.

She did not register until after her EP, and just in time for her shower. I paid my part of the shower, and gave an additional $100 worth of stuff from her registry.

We also gave cash for her wedding. They were engaged one year & 3 months.


Posted 9/7/07 10:27 AM
 

JMC1014
We got a puppy!!

Member since 5/07

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Name:
J

Re: how much for an engagement party gift?

Posted by Kara

Posted by dita

I think 1/2 of what you would give at the wedding is appropriate. That's what I do if it's a formal party.
If it's a backyard deal I usually give less than that.



It's at a firehouse. The groom-to-be's parents are hosting.



If you don't to give a large gift, which I don't think is really necessary, I would maybe pick up a nice vase or toasting flutes, maybe a cake server.

Posted 9/7/07 10:30 AM
 

Blu-ize
Plan B is Now Plan A

Member since 7/05

32475 total posts

Name:
Susan

Re: how much for an engagement party gift?

I alsways thought the registry is for the shower.

I would give cash and I always have for engagement parties. I do agree that these parties in some cases are a bit overboard.

I think based on what you can afford, give a monetary gift that is less than what the wedding gift would be taking into account what you would spend on the shower, your dress and accessories for the wedding and any other incidentals.

Set a budget for the whole thing and then you should be able to back into the $$ amt.

You may have to kick in for the shower as well when the time comes.

eta: if you know they need the money then definitely give a monetary gift.

Message edited 9/7/2007 11:01:35 AM.

Posted 9/7/07 11:01 AM
 
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