How over wedding planning are you?

Theres a bride on LIW that posted that she's upset with her FSIL because she wants to carry her newborn baby with her and her husband down the aisle. She says her FH is adamant about wanting his whole family in the wedding. she doesnt want the baby carried cause it takes attention away from her. would you argue about this?

for me, i'm sooooooo over the whole wedding planning its not even funny. i realized that its more important to BE married than to GET married. if my DH wanted his whole family to be involved then i dont think id be upset...i mean it is HIS wedding too. how about you guys?


link to LIW post

Re: How over wedding planning are you?

imo the bride is right!

a wedding is no place for a 6 month old. have the baby sit on grandmas lap during church. they shouldnt be bringing the baby to the reception either.

Message edited 5/22/2007 7:16:09 PM.

Re: How over wedding planning are you?

the longer i'm married, the more "over" wedding planning i am... there is SOOO much more important stuff that happens AFTERr the wedding, and THATS the fun stuff- not the party!
i mean, i have friends who are planning weddings now and i like to talk to them about the details and i still like seeing wedding pictures and all that... but i'm pretty mch over it- even when i was planning i was never one of those brides that was like "everything has to be PERFECT, its MY day" blah blah.... i just wnated a fun, laid back day with my family and friends.

Re: How over wedding planning are you?

Re: How over wedding planning are you?

I don't read LIW much anymore because of this - being over wedding planning. However, I do think it's weird to have a newborn in the mom's arms as she walks in as a BM. We had 2 newborns at our reception and it was no big deal...but neither parent was in the bridal party.

I remember being so caught up in the details and all the instances that I thought would ruin our wedding. I was so upset over postage and when I found out that my invites were not hand cancelled. I know, the shame of it all.

Now that I look back on it and see others going through it I am just I still feel like planning a wedding is a hazing ritual and no matter how much married ladies tell brides the BTDT stories, everyone wants there day to be "perfect". All brides/grooms need to go through it though since planning the wedding really is the first test of your commitment to each other. So many people break up during wedding planning that it seems like a rite of passage to have planned a wedding and actually gone through with it.

Message edited 5/22/2007 7:23:26 PM.

Re: How over wedding planning are you?

Re: How over wedding planning are you?

I was sooo over wedding planning before the wedding was over.

By the time the day came, I didn't care what the flowers looked like, what the cake tasted like or if we had, 1 chicken, 1 fish and 1 steak. It didn't matter to me at all.

I just wanted us to be married.

Re: How over wedding planning are you?

It's a WEDDING and should be about FAMILY.

Ops whatever, I am about 4 years over wedding planning.

Re: How over wedding planning are you?

I'm very over wedding planning...but
honestly I would not bring a infant to the church...I mean the kid is not going to remember it, let alone care most likely...so I wouldn't go thru all the trouble.
Get a sitter and leave the baby home!

Message edited 5/22/2007 7:25:59 PM.

Re: How over wedding planning are you?

I am "over" wedding planning... but I tale the brides side on that one!

Re: How over wedding planning are you?

Message edited 5/22/2007 7:24:41 PM.

Re: How over wedding planning are you?

Re: How over wedding planning are you?

Re: How over wedding planning are you?

I am SO over it.

Re: How over wedding planning are you?

I was over planning before my own wedding because planning s*cks out loud. Though I'll always be obsessed with wedding gowns.

I think that it's silly to feel like a baby would take the spot light away from the bride BUT I don't think that it was for the FSIL to decide that she'd hold the baby while walking down the aisle, nor do I think that small children belong at weddings.

Re: How over wedding planning are you?

Re: How over wedding planning are you?

I am not over it at all. I loved every minute of it and actually am starting a wedding consulting business with my friend. My DH thinks I only liked it because I got to make all of the decisions I love it, the excitment, the details, and ahhh the dresses. I love weddings! I wish I could do mine again (same exact day, just relive it again, it was so amazing!)

ETA: Oh yeah, to answer the question, I wouldn't mind if the baby was there but no reason to walk the aisle.

Message edited 5/22/2007 7:54:10 PM.

Re: How over wedding planning are you?

Re: How over wedding planning are you?

I don't care about the baby being there, I had many at my wedding. What if the baby cries before she is to walk down the aisle? What if it cries during the walking? What if it cries while the bride is just about to say 'I Do'? The answer to all three is the wedding will still go on. They'll still be married. The baby will take about .06 seconds away from the day.

I do think it was inappropriate for the FSIL to say that she is carrying the baby down the aisle, that decision should be left up to the bride and groom.

Re: How over wedding planning are you?

Re: How over wedding planning are you?

I am beyond being over wedding planning, but I don't think that has anything to do with me agreeing that the baby should be on someone's lap, not carried by the parents down the aisle. I'm sorry, but I don't think it's unreasonable to not want that. However, I also don't think that could take away from the bride. Nothign can.

Re: How over wedding planning are you?

if you're sooooo over wedding planning it's not even funny, then why do you still go on LIWeddings.com??

Re: How over wedding planning are you?

I'm pretty over wedding planning... but here's my take on this:

I was just at BIL's wedding on saturday and the bride's sister had her 7 month old baby at the church and the reception. Her aunt watched him at the church b/c her and her DH were both in the wedding party (they didn't walk down with the baby). He was in a little tux and he took pics with us at the church after the ceremony (he didn't make a peep). He was up the whole time at the reception and people took turns holding him and they even brought a little playpen to put him in while they ate. It was perfectly fine with him there! So, being that I just saw a baby at a wedding, I think it's fine to have a baby there... just as long as the parents are willing to feed, hold and play with their baby at the wedding.

Her sister's baby is actually a VERY good baby though, but the mother said if he wasn't a good baby they probably would have left him with someone for the reception part.


Edited for spelling.

Message edited 5/22/2007 8:10:14 PM.

Re: How over wedding planning are you?

ok...I'm going against the grain here:

I think she IS being a bit of a bridezilla. As one of the other posters said, how can a 6 month old baby steal the spotlight from the bride??? Please!! Also, this isn't just some random baby...this is her FSIL's child. Her other two children are in the bridal party as well...what's the big deal?

My 6 month old nephew was carried down the aisle by my brother-in-law, who escorted my mom down the aisle. Everyone oohed and ahhed for about five seconds, over how cute he looked in his little tux...and that was that! I came down the aisle, they all oohed and ahhed at me...and we were married! No drama!

I really don't see what the big deal is about the baby being part of the ceremony. As far as the reception goes, now THAT'S no place for a baby. But complaining that the baby will steal some of the "spotlight" is just a tad dramatic.

Re: How over wedding planning are you?

I too am over it. As others said, there is so much more after the wedding that is much more important. That is why I am so glad that we had a VERY small wedding that really represented us and the intimacy of the moment.

I do have to agree with the bride. But to compromise maybe she should agree, but if the baby start to cry, have a person there to take them out?
That is what I had to do with my niece who was 1yr 8 mo.