HUGE vent about my husband..very long..

I hate my husband today.

Last night was awful with Megan. Its definately her molars. She went down at 9 30 with no problem. By 10, she was up and screaming. She didnt go back down until 1 this morning. I sent my husband to sleep downstairs on the couch since he had to wake up this morning for work. He complained that the couch was uncomfortable. So stay in the bed then buddy..then you will be up all night with me (Megan is in the room with us for now.) So..then he starts screaming that he should try because I dont know what I am doing! I dont know what I am doing???? Oh really????? Would you like to stay home with her every day with no other life at all????????????? I dont know what I am doing because I couldnt get a aching, teething baby to sleep??? He hurt me so bad!

Then he tells me that if I were a good mother, I would have had her back to sleep by now!!!! I couldnt believe what I was hearing. I wanted to break down right there but I wouldnt give him the satisfaction. He complained that I hadnt folded a bag of laundry TO MY MOTHER when I was at ww last night and apparently my mom sympathized with HIM! Meanwhile, I am out every day with my mom, taking my sister to work, going to the cemetary, driving my mom around because she hasnt felt up to it since my grandmother passed. Then we come back here, eat dinner, she stays until about 10 at night..when do I have time to do it??????

Today he goes to work..calls me like nothing ever happened. I told him to leave me alone. He says call me after Megans appointment..I said for what? He goes I want stats..I said this appointment is ONLY for flu shot. He goes..I didnt know. I told you 100 times!!!!!!!! He said I must have told him a month ago..so what if it was a month ago???? I remembered what it was for didnt I??????

I just dont know why I deserved that last night?? I was already so stressed with Megan. I was crying by the time she finally went down. I couldnt take it anymore. He made me feel so guilty for feeling like that. I truly hate him today.

Re: HUGE vent about my husband..very long..

Re: HUGE vent about my husband..very long..

A lot of insensitive things are said during frustrating times. I'm sorry he said the things he did but I'm sure he didn't mean them.

Re: HUGE vent about my husband..very long..

I'm sorry, he sounds like he was being a jerk! He should not make you feel guilty or responsible for things you cannot control. I'm sure you are a wonderful mom, working dads IMO do not have an excuse and should be liable for their babies just as well!!

.

Message edited 1/8/2008 1:30:53 PM.

Re: HUGE vent about my husband..very long..

First of all . I know exactly what you are talking about, well with your husband. We fought all the time when my DD cried and we couldnt' stop her. I'm not taking his side at all, but you need to take a breath and try to forget about it. Obviously he dosn't care right now about your feelings and you are going to make yourself sick over this. Men don't understand that WE as mothers try our best to get everything under control when we have children. They should help you in any way they can. If this happened to me, I would tell him that I am trying the best I can. If he has a problem with it, to do it yourself. I can't believe your mother took his side though. I would have been fuming about that.

Message edited 10/30/2007 10:10:14 AM.

Re: HUGE vent about my husband..very long..

Posted by MrsBumbleb

A lot of insensitive things are said during frustrating times. I'm sorry he said the things he did but I'm sure he didn't mean them.

Re: HUGE vent about my husband..very long..

Re: HUGE vent about my husband..very long..

Tell him that if he thinks he can do a better job, he can stay home with DC and you go to work everyday.

I mentioned it a few times to DH, and he told me "no way". He had to take care of DS this weekend since I have been sick for a few days. He knows how much work it is. Maybe you should leave DC to your DH for a FULL day and see what he can accomplish then beotch when you come home if something is not done.

Re: HUGE vent about my husband..very long..

Re: HUGE vent about my husband..very long..

Re: HUGE vent about my husband..very long..

i am really sorry he said those things to you, that is totally unfair and clearly he has no clue. Ryan was up last night too and from 1:30-4am just would not go down. You know it's not your fault, he should not have said that crap to you that's just so unfair. I would completely have him take a turn tonight to see how he can do it better himself. Seriously he needs a wakeup call. I do all the nighttime stuff myself but that is my choice and I would probably smack DH if he tried to tell me I wasn't doing good enough. Let him try it for one night and see how easy it is. I am so mad for you!!!!

Re: HUGE vent about my husband..very long..

I am sorry he made you feel that way, they do NOT THINK half the time! I can vent for hours on this topic, but I already feel sick and don't want to bore you!

Take it with a grain of salt and DON'T let it ruin your day.

Re: HUGE vent about my husband..very long..

Amazing and sometimes hurtful things come out of mouths when your sleep deprived.

Re: HUGE vent about my husband..very long..

Re: HUGE vent about my husband..very long..

husbands are such jerks sometimes, a lot of things are said out of frustration...esp when there's a non-sleeping baby & everyone is tired!

Re: HUGE vent about my husband..very long..

Re: HUGE vent about my husband..very long..

they just have no clue at times!!

i'm sorry and i hope tonight is better!!!

Re: HUGE vent about my husband..very long..

I think we've all been there. Sometimes DH's just don't know what to say, and it breaks us. I hope that things start to get better for you! Hang in there!

Message edited 10/30/2007 11:52:59 AM.

Re: HUGE vent about my husband..very long..

Go out shopping this weekend by yourself for the entire day and leave Megan with your DH. Just say "since I don't know what i'm doing with my daughter I might as well go shopping and let the experts take care of Megan". Then hand her to him and walk out without leaving him with any instructions. Let's see how he does...

He deserves such a big SMACK!

Message edited 10/30/2007 11:53:38 AM.

Re: HUGE vent about my husband..very long..

It's amazing how stupid and mean they can be! I'm sorry you had such a bad night. Know you are a good Mom and don't let him get a way with speaking to you like that.

Re: HUGE vent about my husband..very long..

Im so sorry. It hink your in the right and Im sorry he doesnt see it right now. I hope he comes to his senses.

Re: HUGE vent about my husband..very long..

Re: HUGE vent about my husband..very long..

Re: HUGE vent about my husband..very long..

First


Second, have you talked to him?
Cause when you do ask him what was up his azz to think that he can speak to you that way.

Third, if he still feels that way - tell him - here you go, you think you can do a better job, the job to calm her and put her back to sleep or what have you - it is now your (his) job.

And also tell him, if he feels that things aren't getting done, tell him to write a list of things that need to be done.
Then - when he has the list done, you go through them (edited - to add all of the other things that have to be done in a day) and give him some of the things on the list for him to do.

He will then keep his mouth shut and tell you - you are doing a wonderful job.
In which we all know you are doing a GREAT JOB!

Message edited 10/30/2007 12:27:14 PM.