Re: "I can't believe you're not finding out!"

People need to keep their opinions to themsevles. It is a very personal choice to find out the sex and no one else's business. I know family gets excited b.c they like to know - but I feel like if you aren't pushing it out or you didn't help to conceive it then you shouldn't have a say in that decision. I know it is hard but just smile and ignore them and tell them when they have their own children they can make the decision to find out.

Re: "I can't believe you're not finding out!"

We didn't fond out either and got that shocked look when we told people. I had a few people tell me I was making it so hard on them cause they couldn't shop early for gifts! Gee...sorry to be such an be such a bother to you!!! I loved not finding out--and would do the same with another baby. We painted the room green and have neutral bedding but you can already tell it is a little boys room. We got some nice "boy" looking gifts, toys etc. that are in his room.

Stick to your guns and don't let anyone pressure you!! It is more uncommon not to find out but I loved the anticipation of everyone that day. The nurses were even getting involved in the guessing game when I was in labor.

Re: "I can't believe you're not finding out!"

I actually get the opposite. I WANT to find out, and people are giving me "WHY, it's the one surprise you're going to get".

It's no one's business what you choose and why. When you have a kid, you do what you want, but don't judge me! GRRR! (My MIL is one of these people)

Because of that I'm not telling people our baby name ideas, because I don't need their opinions. It's OUR child, not yours!

Re: "I can't believe you're not finding out!"

People always have something to say

I think that it is great that you have the will power not to know- good for you ! ( I am quite the opposite )

Please don't let people get to you

Re: "I can't believe you're not finding out!"

Posted by curliegirl

Posted by Sunrise813

We decided not to find out, I agree with you, its nice to have a little extra soemthign to look forward to.

I can't wait for the moment when the doctor announces

"Its a girl" or Its a boy"

I really look forward to that moment.

Also I imagine our families outside inthe waiting room anticipating if its a girl or a boy.

You put it perfectly, thank you.

Re: "I can't believe you're not finding out!"

I actually got the opposite. I can't believe you are finding out!

What is the big deal? Either way it is a surprise. I was crying and going nuts at the Level II when they told us which is a better reaction then I would have given during my c-section anyway.

Re: "I can't believe you're not finding out!"

People will comment regardless whether you want to find out or not. They just feel it's FREE FOR ALL to make comments to pregnant women.

People commented on
- why I was finding out.
- why I was having an amnio
- why I would not go "natural" with no epi
- why I wanted gifts from the registry
- why I would consider a c-section
- why I can't find shoes that fit my swollen feet
- How BIG I looked (even when I had lost 4 Lbs in my 1st trimester)
- How low I carry.

You name it....

In the end, it's each of us choice and nybody's business.

Who cares about anobody else?

Message edited 5/23/2007 11:00:05 AM.

Re: "I can't believe you're not finding out!"

I do understand the "can't believe you're not finding out" reaction, but I wouldn't rub it in someone's face....just ignore the person who annoys you, that's the best advice I can give!

Message edited 5/23/2007 10:58:19 AM.

Re: "I can't believe you're not finding out!"

I've had a few people say that and now that my due date is only 7 weeks away I am so glad I waited...we are so very excited to find out what we're having. The surprise waiting for us is the best!!!

Re: "I can't believe you're not finding out!"

I find no matter what, people comment ... on every little thing ...
* If you are already a mother, it gives to free reign to shove your opinion down my throat.
* If you want to be a mother one day, I have to hear about "how you will feel, what you will do, and what you know is right"
* If you know someone who had a child or is pregnant, you will inevitably compare them to me, every single time I open my mouth about anything.

You cannot win. Grin, bare it and silently repeat over and over again "STFU STFU STFU STFU"

That's what I do :)

Re: "I can't believe you're not finding out!"

First and foremost, I want a healthy baby. We didn't find out the sex to paint pink or blue- in fact, the room is green.

Like everyone else said, to each his own. I get the opposite response from you, "why don't you want to be surprised?" my response, "Why do you care what I want to do?"

What I find really funny about these people, is why this is the first question? If you don't want to know, don't ask me! I have an acquaintance that I just saw recently. She too is pregnant and her first question to me was "Do you know?" I said yes, told her and asked her the same question- she said no, we didn't want to know. That still puzzles me!

Re: "I can't believe you're not finding out!"

Am I the only one who does not know a lot of people who did find out? In the past 2 years, I think I have had 2 friends have babies and find out, but another 8-9 who didn't.

Unfortunately, this area may only be the beginning in terms of the unsolicited opinions that us moms are going to get.

Re: "I can't believe you're not finding out!"

Re: "I can't believe you're not finding out!"

People sometimes say dumb things, they just don't know any better. It's really not worth paying any attention to or getting yourself worked up over- it's none of his business anyway. Sometimes you just have to shrug things off.

Re: "I can't believe you're not finding out!"

People will always have something to say. We aren't finding out either and people are really shocked by it. I will say I know over 10 people preggo right now and only 3 of us aren't finding out. So I do feel in the minority but it doesn't affect my decision. I just ignore the weird stares and comments and know I am very happy with our decision. We didn't find out with our first child and I loved, loved the moment after the birth and all that when the doctor announced the sex of the baby. It was the sweetest moment and I can't wait to experience it again.

The one comment I get that annoys me is - - I had to know/I would have to know because I am such a planner. Are you planning for a sex or a baby? Isn't it really all the same things you have to plan? Paint color and bedding and clothing all have to be picked whether it is for the sex or unisex, no??? I don't mind those that say I can't wait or I just needed to know or they want to know but the planning thing irks me for some reason. And if anyone knows me or DH - I doubt they know someone who is more obsessive compulsive when it comes to planning. We are both super type A planners.....