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rose825
Best Friends
Member since 6/05 10228 total posts
Name:
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I dont mean to be bittchee...
But does anyone else resent that there seem to be so many posts lately from people who dont post here regularly asking questions that are not IF related?
Maybe its just me. I 100% do not mind when they are related to IF, but to just pop in here and expect an answer from what I can only assume they consider "the experts" is insulting. This is a personal thing for us and I hate feeling like I am being used as a search engine. I am a personal with a struggle on a journey. I learn as I go.
If you are truly interested in the IF journey, post your story, Wish us luck, send  or or or when they are needed.
But I dont want to feel like an information booth.
I am not referring to anyone in particular, but there have been several this week and I guess they were just the icing on the cake.
Sorry for the rant. Vent over!
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Posted 2/5/07 3:32 PM  |
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karacg
Babygirl is 4!
Member since 5/05 17076 total posts
Name:
Kara®
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Re: I dont mean to be bittchee...
I think you expressed yourself very well and have spoken for many....
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| Posted 2/5/07 3:39 PM |
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DRMom
Two in Blue
Member since 5/05 20223 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: I dont mean to be bittchee...
To be honest I don't see the big deal. We don't "own" this board. It is a public board. While many here know my story and it is not the typical IF story, I am still dealing with not being able to have my own child right now. I haven't always received the warmest reception.IVF can't help me, IUI can't help me. Really the only thing that can is being independently wealthy! I know, I always watch out that I do not become "the victim" It is very easy to get wrapped up in that. I love when people post for help because at least by helping someone, some of my knowledge is put to good use and it is not all gathered in vain. 
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| Posted 2/5/07 3:42 PM |
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dm24angel
Happiness
Member since 5/05 34581 total posts
Name:
Donna
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Re: I dont mean to be bittchee...
Posted by rose825
But does anyone else resent that there seem to be so many posts lately from people who dont post here regularly asking questions that are not IF related?
Maybe its just me. I 100% do not mind when they are related to IF, but to just pop in here and expect an answer from what I can only assume they consider "the experts" is insulting. This is a personal thing for us and I hate feeling like I am being used as a search engine. I am a personal with a struggle on a journey. I learn as I go.
If you are truly interested in the IF journey, post your story, Wish us luck, send or or or when they are needed.
But I dont want to feel like an information booth.
I am not referring to anyone in particular, but there have been several this week and I guess they were just the icing on the cake.
Sorry for the rant. Vent over!
That was very well worded and I agree with you.
Although I may have moved on from my infertility at the moment, it will always be a part of me and my journey and I come back here OFTEN to check on old friends and to help new people.
This is a VERY specific board , and to be honest Infertility is a pretty darn specific topic, not like "home" where anything goes.
It comes with a series of emotions and struggles that only SOME can understand and yes it does indeed deserve a little more sensitivety then other boards.
Its called RESPECT.
Melijane- I almost feel insulted at your choice to say you dont want to fall into a "victim" role. Because it implies others here might and that would be a horrid thing for anyone to say.
Pauline's point, or the part of her point I think you missed is....for ex. If you have recently had a M/C....Infertility is not the board for you. You are not yet dealing with infertility and to come on here and assume the ones who cant get pregnant will better understand is insulting as Pauline said ...
Coming on here asking for advcie b/c no one is responding on PG or TTC is common and I agree Pauline, its time for a heads up about what those on here are really feeling and to hopefully avoid it continuing!
ETA- As the m/c comment was brought to my attention. Im referring to those who get PG on their first try and then have a M/C , which is awful..I have been there, but asking about betas and what not on here is not the point of this board. There have been some posts recently and Even I felt it was not the place.
Message edited 2/5/2007 3:57:13 PM.
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| Posted 2/5/07 3:49 PM |
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rose825
Best Friends
Member since 6/05 10228 total posts
Name:
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Re: I dont mean to be bittchee...
Posted by melijane
To be honest I don't see the big deal. We don't "own" this board. It is a public board. While many here know my story and it is not the typical IF story, I am still dealing with not being able to have my own child right now. I haven't always received the warmest reception.IVF can't help me, IUI can't help me. Really the only thing that can is being independently wealthy! I know, I always watch out that I do not become "the victim" It is very easy to get wrapped up in that. I love when people post for help because at least by helping someone, some of my knowledge is put to good use and it is not all gathered in vain.
 yeah, but what about when its not related to IF???
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| Posted 2/5/07 3:49 PM |
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Red
spring is in the air
Member since 11/05 2688 total posts
Name:
helen
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Re: I dont mean to be bittchee...
I've noticed it a little lately, and although I don't think we have the power to stop it, I do think we might be looked upon as the the go to board when no one else will, or can answer elsewhere.
That said, I am usually open to helping others, but if someone asks for a friend - (and no offense to anyone ) - if that friend wants to ask a question, let them log on, introduce themselves and ask a question
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| Posted 2/5/07 3:59 PM |
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DRMom
Two in Blue
Member since 5/05 20223 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: I dont mean to be bittchee...
Posted by rose825
Posted by melijane
To be honest I don't see the big deal. We don't "own" this board. It is a public board. While many here know my story and it is not the typical IF story, I am still dealing with not being able to have my own child right now. I haven't always received the warmest reception.IVF can't help me, IUI can't help me. Really the only thing that can is being independently wealthy! I know, I always watch out that I do not become "the victim" It is very easy to get wrapped up in that. I love when people post for help because at least by helping someone, some of my knowledge is put to good use and it is not all gathered in vain.
yeah, but what about when its not related to IF???
But don't you think someone could not know anything about m/c and think hmmm IF maybe there are some people on here who can answer my question? Fact is people are having babies all around me, getting pregnant, showers the whoile nine. If I allow myslef to get upset or bogged down in that it does absolutley nothing for me except wallow in pity and resent the people closest to me. I'm getting off on a tangent here but I am trying to say we all have so much knowledge-maybe we can help and maybe we can't but I feel if I have it why not share it(aleways telling people to confirm with their Dr's of course)
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| Posted 2/5/07 4:00 PM |
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rose825
Best Friends
Member since 6/05 10228 total posts
Name:
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Re: I dont mean to be bittchee...
Posted by Red
That said, I am usually open to helping others, but if someone asks for a friend - (and no offense to anyone ) - if that friend wants to ask a question, let them log on, introduce themselves and ask a question
see that doesnt bother me as much. I guess when it is truly IF related or it relates to the persons IF journey it belongs here.
Its the is a line really a line kinda question that bugs me. I just think we are knowledgable about IF but we are not "all things vagina".
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| Posted 2/5/07 4:02 PM |
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Red
spring is in the air
Member since 11/05 2688 total posts
Name:
helen
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Re: I dont mean to be bittchee...
Posted by rose825
I just think we are knowledgable about IF but we are not "all things vagina".
I agree on that one
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| Posted 2/5/07 4:05 PM |
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QuoteTheRaven424
22 Months?!!!!
Member since 5/05 13659 total posts
Name:
And If That Isn't A True Blue Miracle
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Re: I dont mean to be bittchee...
Posted by melijane
Posted by rose825
Posted by melijane
To be honest I don't see the big deal. We don't "own" this board. It is a public board. While many here know my story and it is not the typical IF story, I am still dealing with not being able to have my own child right now. I haven't always received the warmest reception.IVF can't help me, IUI can't help me. Really the only thing that can is being independently wealthy! I know, I always watch out that I do not become "the victim" It is very easy to get wrapped up in that. I love when people post for help because at least by helping someone, some of my knowledge is put to good use and it is not all gathered in vain.
yeah, but what about when its not related to IF???
But don't you think someone could not know anything about m/c and think hmmm IF maybe there are some people on here who can answer my question? Fact is people are having babies all around me, getting pregnant, showers the whoile nine. If I allow myslef to get upset or bogged down in that it does absolutley nothing for me except wallow in pity and resent the people closest to me. I'm getting off on a tangent here but I am trying to say we all have so much knowledge-maybe we can help and maybe we can't but I feel if I have it why not share it(aleways telling people to confirm with their Dr's of course)
this is sooooo not going to end well 
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| Posted 2/5/07 4:06 PM |
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Gertyrae
Peace out Homies!
Member since 5/05 20046 total posts
Name:
Gerty ®
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Re: I dont mean to be bittchee...
I don't mind helping when someone has an honest question, wether for themselves or a friend. I find it strange when people come on IF as an addition to TTC and/or PG just to get more answers because they aren't happy with what they are hearing elsewhere.
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| Posted 2/5/07 4:07 PM |
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dm24angel
Happiness
Member since 5/05 34581 total posts
Name:
Donna
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Re: I dont mean to be bittchee...
Posted by melijane
Fact is people are having babies all around me, getting pregnant, showers the whoile nine. If I allow myslef to get upset or bogged down in that it does absolutley nothing for me except wallow in pity and resent the people closest to me.
This makes you then spiritually above many of us and I resent that implication.
Being upset and not being able to not make it to a shower for example..which I have done countless times does not mean I'm WALLOWING IN SELF PITY or Resenting anyone. It's called self preservation.
Message edited 2/5/2007 4:12:32 PM.
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| Posted 2/5/07 4:08 PM |
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Red
spring is in the air
Member since 11/05 2688 total posts
Name:
helen
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Re: I dont mean to be bittchee...
Posted by CaptainCharisma424
this is sooooo not going to end well
It might not, it started out innocently enough, but seems to have taken a bad turn somewhere, but I don't think Pauline is the only one who feels this way
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| Posted 2/5/07 4:12 PM |
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rose825
Best Friends
Member since 6/05 10228 total posts
Name:
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Re: I dont mean to be bittchee...
Posted by CaptainCharisma424
this is sooooo not going to end well
It doesnt need to. We are all adults. I dont need everyone to agree with me.
Melijane I think its great that you can have that attitude. I myself have good days and bad. This week is good and I am helping some great friends do their baby registry.
I love sharing what I know and thats why I lurk on other baords and answer questions there when I have answers.
BUt I would never post on the bereavement board about what to get my mother for her birthday. I KNOW its not the same thing at all but you get the gist.
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| Posted 2/5/07 4:12 PM |
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juju
Welcome to the World!
Member since 5/05 6747 total posts
Name:
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Re: I dont mean to be bittchee...
When someone does post on this board, I have no idea where they are at in their journey which is why I don't mind giving feedback or advice. The feedback on this board might help them realize that they do suffer from Infertility and that their next step should be is to go see a RE.
I think an introduction would be nice, but I do understand that for some women it takes time to open up to people especially in the beginning of IF journey.
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| Posted 2/5/07 4:12 PM |
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rose825
Best Friends
Member since 6/05 10228 total posts
Name:
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Re: I dont mean to be bittchee...
Posted by dm24angel
It's called self preservation.
This should be a forum where we are "safe" regardless of our frame of mind.
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| Posted 2/5/07 4:14 PM |
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QuoteTheRaven424
22 Months?!!!!
Member since 5/05 13659 total posts
Name:
And If That Isn't A True Blue Miracle
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Re: I dont mean to be bittchee...
Posted by Red
Posted by CaptainCharisma424
this is sooooo not going to end well
It might not, it started out innocently enough, but seems to have taken a bad turn somewhere, but I don't think Pauline is the only one who feels this way
true that
all good from where i sit
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| Posted 2/5/07 4:15 PM |
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DRMom
Two in Blue
Member since 5/05 20223 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: I dont mean to be bittchee...
Posted by dm24angel
Posted by melijane
Fact is people are having babies all around me, getting pregnant, showers the whoile nine. If I allow myslef to get upset or bogged down in that it does absolutley nothing for me except wallow in pity and resent the people closest to me.
This makes you then spiritually above many of us and I resent that implication.
Being upset and not being able to not make it to a shower for example..which I have done countless times does not mean I'm WALLOWING IN SELF PITY or Resenting anyone. It's called self preservation.
Donna,
I think I made it pretty clear I am talking about myself-not any of you. Helping people empowers me and uses this knowledge I wish I didn't have.
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| Posted 2/5/07 4:16 PM |
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rose825
Best Friends
Member since 6/05 10228 total posts
Name:
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Re: I dont mean to be bittchee...
Posted by CaptainCharisma424
Posted by Red
Posted by CaptainCharisma424
this is sooooo not going to end well
It might not, it started out innocently enough, but seems to have taken a bad turn somewhere, but I don't think Pauline is the only one who feels this way
true that
all good from where i sit
would you care to comment?
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| Posted 2/5/07 4:16 PM |
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Gertyrae
Peace out Homies!
Member since 5/05 20046 total posts
Name:
Gerty ®
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Re: I dont mean to be bittchee...
Posted by juju
When someone does post on this board, I have no idea where they are at in their journey which is why I don't mind giving feedback or advice. The feedback on this board might help them realize that they do suffer from Infertility and that their next step should be is to go see a RE.
I think an introduction would be nice, but I do understand that for some women it takes time to open up to people especially in the beginning of IF journey.
See, this I agree with 100%...I think it sometimes takes a lot to admit to infertility and some people explore around when they need more answers.
But, this is off the original point. I think what Pauline is expressing are the people who post on here randomly and in addition to other boards about non-infertility issues or with the same question/comment they have posted on other boards.
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| Posted 2/5/07 4:16 PM |
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rose825
Best Friends
Member since 6/05 10228 total posts
Name:
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Re: I dont mean to be bittchee...
Posted by Gertyrae
I think what Pauline is expressing are the people who post on here randomly and in addition to other boards about non-infertility issues or with the same question/comment they have posted on other boards.
Yes
PS- This might turn into the first drama post on IF
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| Posted 2/5/07 4:18 PM |
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DRMom
Two in Blue
Member since 5/05 20223 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: I dont mean to be bittchee...
Posted by rose825
Posted by CaptainCharisma424
this is sooooo not going to end well
It doesnt need to. We are all adults. I dont need everyone to agree with me.
Melijane I think its great that you can have that attitude. I myself have good days and bad. This week is good and I am helping some great friends do their baby registry.
I love sharing what I know and thats why I lurk on other baords and answer questions there when I have answers.
BUt I would never post on the bereavement board about what to get my mother for her birthday. I KNOW its not the same thing at all but you get the gist.
Thnak you Pauline I was speaking about my own personal experience. And opinion of course!
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| Posted 2/5/07 4:18 PM |
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QuoteTheRaven424
22 Months?!!!!
Member since 5/05 13659 total posts
Name:
And If That Isn't A True Blue Miracle
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Re: I dont mean to be bittchee...
Posted by rose825
Posted by CaptainCharisma424
Posted by Red
Posted by CaptainCharisma424
this is sooooo not going to end well
It might not, it started out innocently enough, but seems to have taken a bad turn somewhere, but I don't think Pauline is the only one who feels this way
true that
all good from where i sit
would you care to comment?
on deadline at the moment
perhaps later though I suspect that this will die down by the time i can
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| Posted 2/5/07 4:20 PM |
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juju
Welcome to the World!
Member since 5/05 6747 total posts
Name:
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Re: I dont mean to be bittchee...
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| Posted 2/5/07 4:22 PM |
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Gertyrae
Peace out Homies!
Member since 5/05 20046 total posts
Name:
Gerty ®
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Re: I dont mean to be bittchee...
Posted by rose825
PS- This might turn into the first drama post on IF
Doubt it, we are all adults. I think it will definitely "scare" away some of the pointless posters, though.
If you notice, it's mostly those of us who have been here awhile responding to the thread.
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| Posted 2/5/07 4:26 PM |
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