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6months
LIF Adolescent
Member since 11/08 598 total posts
Name:
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I have 6 pregnant friends! 6!
And these aren't just random friends, but my close friends!
I miscarried in March and now my friends are 'afraid' to share their happy news with me. I found out that 3 of them are pregnant via facebook. While I understand them not wanting to tell me right away, I do feel kind of ousted! I am genuinely happy for them and I want to share in their happiness but they won't let me. Them not telling me just reminds me of my loss.
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Posted 7/1/10 4:51 PM  |
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shelby34
Love being a twin mommy!
Member since 5/07 2934 total posts
Name:
Michele
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Re: I have 6 pregnant friends! 6!
A very good friend of mine went through the IF journey with me. We always said, "if you get pg, you better tell me and not feel bad!". I think you should just be honest and let them know that you want to share in their happiness and would love for them to let you be a part of this special time for them.
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| Posted 7/1/10 4:54 PM |
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angel333
Sigh.....
Member since 3/10 1803 total posts
Name:
AKS
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Re: I have 6 pregnant friends! 6!
I think that is pretty rude..... They should have realized that by doing that they would have hurt you even more  I'm so sorry that your friends think that you would be jealous....they probably think that way though because if the situation was reverse and they were in your place they would be jealous which shows some bad traits in their personalities  I wouldn't sweat it though, just ignore them  You are the better person  
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| Posted 7/1/10 5:00 PM |
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BA2008
Need to find some hope!
Member since 2/08 2485 total posts
Name:
Beth -Ann
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Re: I have 6 pregnant friends! 6!
I sometimes think our friends don't know when to tell us or when not to. I'm sure they didn't not tell you to hurt you. They probably wanted to protect you. Just tell them flat out that you are OK with it and happy for them. It will be better in the end if you just do that. 6 is a lot though. At one time I had 20 friends pregnant at the same time (I'm not kidding). Luckily for my sanity I was still trying to get DH to get married...so it didn't phase me. That would have been bad probably...LOL..
A good friend of mine, that I obviously haven't spoken to in a 9mths...had a baby and didn't tell us. I found out because she was interviewing DH and the baby cried in the background and he asked me. It felt like a punch in the stomach that she didn't tell me. But, when I said something she told me she didn't know what to do. I told her I'm happy for her and that I'll get mine one day soon.
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| Posted 7/1/10 6:36 PM |
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6months
LIF Adolescent
Member since 11/08 598 total posts
Name:
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Re: I have 6 pregnant friends! 6!
Sometimes I wonder if they didn't tell me to protect me or because they thought I'd be jealous. I certainly am not maliciously jealous! Anyway, I've missed all their baby showers now so I'll just leave it up to them now on how involved they want me to be.
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| Posted 7/2/10 9:27 AM |
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BA2008
Need to find some hope!
Member since 2/08 2485 total posts
Name:
Beth -Ann
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Re: I have 6 pregnant friends! 6!
Posted by 6months
Sometimes I wonder if they didn't tell me to protect me or because they thought I'd be jealous. I certainly am not maliciously jealous! Anyway, I've missed all their baby showers now so I'll just leave it up to them now on how involved they want me to be.
OMG - they already had their baby showers. OK, that is wrong. I thought maybe they all were around 3 mths and it was still new. Gosh, they should have given you the option to choose how you wanted to deal with it.
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| Posted 7/2/10 10:27 AM |
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6months
LIF Adolescent
Member since 11/08 598 total posts
Name:
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Re: I have 6 pregnant friends! 6!
Posted by BA2008
Posted by 6months
Sometimes I wonder if they didn't tell me to protect me or because they thought I'd be jealous. I certainly am not maliciously jealous! Anyway, I've missed all their baby showers now so I'll just leave it up to them now on how involved they want me to be.
OMG - they already had their baby showers. OK, that is wrong. I thought maybe they all were around 3 mths and it was still new. Gosh, they should have given you the option to choose how you wanted to deal with it.
3 of the 6 had their showers already. I saw pics on facebook, whcih was how I found out they were pregnant! The other 3 are not far along. We'll see how they treat me. I emailed them wishing them a happy and healthy pregnancy.
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| Posted 7/2/10 10:42 AM |
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ricaim
LIF Adult
Member since 8/09 1201 total posts
Name:
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Re: I have 6 pregnant friends! 6!
I am so sorry. I had one reaction- but then it changed when I saw that they had the baby showers already. This is your close knit group of girlfriends?
I could understand a friend being kinda uncomfortably telling you. But a good friend, like one of mine, should be able to say it and know how truly happy us gals dealing with IF or miscarriage would be for her. Certainly telling a friends discretely is a generous way to honor what a friend has gone through. Not telling them at all just seems absurd to me and hurtful.
A thousand hugs
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| Posted 7/2/10 5:57 PM |
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