If you buy someone a gift...UPDATED - advice plz!

and they don't get you one, do you still give them the one you bought?
And I don't mean a $10 gift card, I'm talking a substantial type of gift?

ETA:

Here's the situation...
My boss and I have always been good friends, past two years i have bought him pretty expensive gifts and he has given me a bonus' approx. 5x bigger. This year our friendship/working relationship has completely deteriorated to the point that i've talked about looking for another job. Part of the riff between us stems from a substantial paycut he gave me.
I'm thinking its very possible that he might not even give me a bonus this year, in which the awesome cufflinks I got him would perhaps been a waste.

Should i give them to him regardless, or only give them to him if he gives me a bonus?

need advice!
TIA

Message edited 12/21/2007 12:34:38 PM.

Re: If you buy someone a gift...

Yes. I give someone a gift because I want to give it to them, not because I expected anything in return.

Re: If you buy someone a gift...

I absolutely would. I don't give a gift just b/c I expect to get one in return.

And how would you know you weren't getting anything in return? Would you wait until they gave you something for you to give to them? You can't take it back if they wind up not giving you something... Or do you mean if you find out ahead of time they aren't giving you anything?

Either way, I'd still give it to them...

ETA - If it were a person who indicated a desire not to exchange gifts this year, though, I probably wouldn't -- so long as I could return it, keep it myself, or give it to someone else who might want it. This is only so I didn't make them feel awkward after we agreed not to exchange.

Otherwise, I'd still give it to them.

Message edited 12/19/2007 3:55:22 PM.

Re: If you buy someone a gift...

why not? you bought them a gift cause you wanted to right? not cause you figured they'd get you something in return.

it seems odd to say "well i'm just gonna keep this gift or give it to someone else cause they didn't give me anything"

Re: If you buy someone a gift...

Yes because if I bought a gift for someone, it's because I like them, not because they're giving me a gift.

Re: If you buy someone a gift...

i would still give it to them, but in all honesty, if i didn't get a gift in return (not that i was expecting one) i don'tn think that i would give one again the next year BUT only because i would assume that the other person didn't get me a gift because they were *hinting* that they did not want to exchange gifts at all.

Re: If you buy someone a gift...

I'm confused by your Question.

I give a person a gift because its what I wanted to do. Not looking for anything in return.

Re: If you buy someone a gift...

I would sill give the gift. You wanted to give it in the 1st place.

A couple of years ago, an acquantance called me to say "let's meet up so I can give you your gift." It was so annoying to get something for someone whom I was not close, but I did feel an obligation.

Re: If you buy someone a gift...

I think it depends.

If you want to give a gift b/c you think they're nifty, go right ahead.

If you only bought the gift because you felt obligated & you are now certain the person doesn't expect to exchange, then you could keep it, return it to give it to someone else. If you do give it, the person may then feel obligated to get you one next year & you'll be stuck in the cycle.

Of course, I'm assuming this a friend. If it is someone who worked for your/below you, give the gift anyway.

Re: If you buy someone a gift...UPDATED - advice plz!

bumping for help

Re: If you buy someone a gift...UPDATED - advice plz!

I can definitely understand what you are saying. Last year we didn't get our normal bonus before Christmas, I was freaking out a little bc I had gotten my boss a somewhat expensive gift, based on the fact that he had been so generous with bonsues in the past. When we didn't get the bonus I freaked. We ended up getting it in our Dec. 30 pay checks.
If I were you I would not give him the expensive gift. I think you ment well when getting it, but after a pay cut and most likely no bonus I would return the gift and keep your money. Maybe just buy a cheaper token gift.

Re: If you buy someone a gift...UPDATED - advice plz!