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christy
Mommy of 2
Member since 5/05 6787 total posts
Name:
Christy
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Re: If you were ready for a baby before DH...
It was frustrating, but the reality was that I wouldn't TTC until he was ready. I figured it is a huge decision and we would enjoy it more if we both felt ready to try. So, basically I had to sit back and wait. Turns out, he came around pretty quick!
Good Luck!
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Posted 2/18/07 9:18 AM  |
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Jen2999
Baby girls & beagles rock!
Member since 8/06 10356 total posts
Name:
Jen
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Re: If you were ready for a baby before DH...
Im in a similar situation. I always thought we'd wait till 1.5 years after we were married. After we got back from our honeymoon, I went off the pill for various reasons and I wanted to regulate myself before eventually trying for a baby. It was then that I found out I am going to have some major TTC issues and will need fertility treatments. I feel that I now need to be proactive about this, as time is not going to help the situation. DH feels that we JUST got married and should enjoy it and our new house before having the financial burden of a child. To me, we've already been together 8 years and we HAVE a house and stable income...
I am upset, but I am waiting and am trying to find excuses to justify it (ex. Im finishing my Master's and will e done end of March and I am slo not tenured-in my 2nd year)
I know with my DH if I hound him, he will ack off altogether. He needs to come to terms with the thought of fertility treatments and the chance of multiples before he will be ready. We kind of made an agreement that we'd wait till the summerish and then revisit the discussion. I am due for my annual in May so I will bring it up again before the appointment.
Message edited 2/18/2007 9:21:29 AM.
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| Posted 2/18/07 9:18 AM |
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mikeswife06
Drama Momma
Member since 9/06 9947 total posts
Name:
Anne
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Re: If you were ready for a baby before DH...
Posted by Jen2999
It was then that I found out I am going to have some major TTC issues and will need fertility treatments. I feel that I now need to be proactive about this, as time is not going to help the situation. To me, we've already been together 8 years and we HAVE a house and stable income...
I am upset, but I am waiting and am trying to find excuses to justify it (ex. Im finishing my Master's and will e done end of March and I am slo not tenured-in my 2nd year)
Wow, after 8 years I would be a wild woman. It's good that you went of the pill now rather than when you were ready to start. Good luck with everything and thank you!!!! 
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| Posted 2/18/07 9:28 AM |
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hope07
LIF Adult
Member since 12/06 1050 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you were ready for a baby before DH...
Great to hear your stories
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| Posted 2/28/07 7:13 PM |
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Kelly9904
Mommy to 2 amazing little boys
Member since 5/05 9306 total posts
Name:
Kelly
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Re: If you were ready for a baby before DH...
Message edited 1/30/2009 9:43:03 AM.
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| Posted 3/1/07 2:01 PM |
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sunflowerjesss
Mommy to 3!
Member since 10/05 20369 total posts
Name:
Jesss, duh.
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Re: If you were ready for a baby before DH...
Funny-DH always said he wanted to wait due to "our list". Basically we made a list of things which needed to be completed before TTC. And while I understood where he was coming from I was too impatient and kept begging.
Finally I gave up and realized when he was ready he'd say so. Sure enough, he did, and we are planning on going off BCP in June and TTC in September.
Just give it time-he'll come around. It's hard to have patience but it will all be worth it in the end.
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| Posted 3/1/07 2:09 PM |
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Re: If you were ready for a baby before DH...
I also try to explain to him that just because we decide to start trying (or not preventing) doesnt mean that baby will be here the next day....I think guys forget that sometimes.
Sorry to hijack, but that is sooo true.
We were going to wait because we have realyl bad financial issues. But 3 wks after our wedding, I became pregnant - and DH was still laid off from his job! We had no idea how we were going to do this. Also, our landlord told us he was moving back in in April (when the baby was due) - he told us this in July....
So, there we were, one income, having to move, and freaking out - talk about not being ready! DH went to a few interviews, all nil... Then he finally found a great job in October or November... with 5 months to go before baby was here.... Then, we found a more affordable home with lower rent than what we were paying... with 3 bedrooms to move to so baby can have a room (we were in a 2 bdrm rental before that) - that was in December....
We moved all thru the month of December and January, DH painted everynight until 11 or 12 and woke up at 3:45 every morning to go to work... our place is pretty much together... so, in 5-6 mts from BFP to Jan, we did everything we could to get ready. And there are still things we need to do - and forget about our financial sitaution - that will never get better during my fertile years (I'm 33, he's 43)
Just wanted to share that there is no time to ever be physically ready. Emotionally ready is the important one....
good luck with everything!!!
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| Posted 3/3/07 9:09 AM |
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hope07
LIF Adult
Member since 12/06 1050 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you were ready for a baby before DH...
Message edited 4/1/2007 4:52:30 PM.
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| Posted 3/20/07 7:58 PM |
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hope07
LIF Adult
Member since 12/06 1050 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you were ready for a baby before DH...
Posted by kelly9904
I think somewhere just ingrained in a Mans brain is the need to "support" his family (even though many of our DHs know we will always be double income households) and to have everything in a certain place before they bring a child into it. I know this doesnt help, but its just my observation.
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Yes! I agree.. men have this thing that they need to be able to do it all financially. Babies I guess make it that much harder for them to feel financially successful.
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| Posted 4/1/07 4:52 PM |
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HoneyBadger
YourWorstNightmare.
Member since 10/06 15979 total posts
Name:
BahBahBlackJeep
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Re: If you were ready for a baby before DH...
Posted by lipglossjunky73
Just wanted to share that there is no time to ever be physically ready. Emotionally ready is the important one....
I think you hit the nail on the head here...
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| Posted 4/1/07 5:08 PM |
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karen62794
LIF Infant
Member since 6/06 103 total posts
Name:
Karen
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Re: If you were ready for a baby before DH...
Same thing here.
My husband is strictly a "numbers" guy and always thought we should wait. I've wanted a baby since I could remember and now with my best friend due in May, I guess it sped up our conversations on this matter. We've been talking a lot more about TTC, especially since the fall.
We will be married 4 years in July and he's finally agreed that we are "financially sufficient" to have a baby. (Of course after some research, some number crunching and some mild family presssure!).
We are hoping to start at the end of this summer.
I think it is important for both of you to be on the same page. It was important for me for DH to feel comfortable, confident and secure in this decision.
Good Luck!
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| Posted 4/9/07 11:28 AM |
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