If your mom or other family member watches your DC, do they listen to your wishes?

My mom watches DS while I work. Not only does she not listen to me, she nags me about my parenting. I swear she is driving me crazy!!! She keeps saying she has more experience than me. She raised us in the 80's! Times have changed.

If you have a family member watching your DC, do they listen to you?

Do they ever question your parenting choices?

Message edited 12/17/2010 11:32:31 AM.

Re: If your mom or other family member watches your DC, do they listen to your wishes?

I am pretty lax so theres not much I tell MIL, but when I do, she listens!

Re: If your mom or other family member watches your DC, do they listen to your wishes?

My mom watches DS, 90% of the time she does her own thing, but I never really gave her any rules.

My POV on it is, shes my MOM, if I can trust anyone to have my DS best interests at heart, even if its not how I would do it, its my mom. She raised all of us and we turned out OK.

Re: If your mom or other family member watches your DC, do they listen to your wishes?

My mother watches my DS 5 days a week. She always listens and does as we wish. Fortunately for me, our parenting styles are very much alike.

Re: If your mom or other family member watches your DC, do they listen to your wishes?

My mom is "learning" with me. She loves learning all the new stuff that is out there. I swear she learned so much about pregnancy when I got pregnant and now about infants. She even shares with her sisters all the stuff that she does now (back to sleep, no solids for 6 months etc)

The only thing she nags me about is that I dont warm up bottles which I am sure she secretly does when I am not around but everything else she is pretty good with. She will tease me here and there about "starving her" but I know its a joke.

Re: If your mom or other family member watches your DC, do they listen to your wishes?

My mom listens to me 100% or else she knows she will never hear the end of it from me..lol.. really, she is a second me & she innately does exactly what I would have done.

When I try to tell my mil a rule, I can see that she isn't even listening to me so lately I've been asking DH to tell her rules for DS, which is causing arguments between DH & I.

Re: If your mom or other family member watches your DC, do they listen to your wishes?

My MIL and mom watch our kids, they do not question our parenting choices, do not over-rule us and listens to our wishes.

Re: If your mom or other family member watches your DC, do they listen to your wishes?

my MIL watches him and yes she listens to my wishes, even if she doesn't necessarily agree with them. she gives me her opinion (in a helpful way) and sometimes I take her advise or sometimes I tell her I'd rather try it my way.

she is generally pretty good about that stuff.

now, my MOM on the other hand, would be just like your mom. I couldn't have that. It would make me apeshit.

Re: If your mom or other family member watches your DC, do they listen to your wishes?

Re: If your mom or other family member watches your DC, do they listen to your wishes?

98% yes. The only thing is that they give dd more cookies than I would-but then I just make sure dd does not get cookies at night. (we eat super healthy in the house) Isnt that what grandparents are for anyway? Spoiling you with stuff that mommy and daddy may not. So I just let it go

Re: If your mom or other family member watches your DC, do they listen to your wishes?

My mom watched DS for 9 months and we never disagreed on anything. I'm pretty laid back, and she is amazing w/ him.

Re: If your mom or other family member watches your DC, do they listen to your wishes?

My parents do - pretty much. I'm pretty laid back though. I always speak up though -

My MIL, did not - she'd deliberately do the opposite of what I told her and it irritated the hell out of me. But I think she did it as more of a 'power' thing than anything else -

Re: If your mom or other family member watches your DC, do they listen to your wishes?

My mom, no. It was beyond irritating and she was so defensive you couldn't say anything to her. Thank God that nightmare is done.
MIL watches my kids very PT and she is very respectful of our wishes whether she agrees or not. She does it the way we ask and never says a word about it.
That's the way it should be!

Re: If your mom or other family member watches your DC, do they listen to your wishes?

Back at the time when my mom was watching DD - no she didn't really listen, AND she tried to hide it from me when she did something she knew I wouldn't agree with.

Re: If your mom or other family member watches your DC, do they listen to your wishes?

my mom babysat once so far....shes keeps asking why I hired a babysitter for the last 2 imes!

well mom....5 month olds shouldn't be up at 11pm playing!! Messed up my scheduled for weeks.

gave her instructions, she didn't listen. Babysitter is AMAZING with him!

Re: If your mom or other family member watches your DC, do they listen to your wishes?

For the most part i'm pretty lax... but the little things that i say to do. My mom listens to for the most part.

My MIL....nope she does what she wants when she wants. For us this is only 1 day, but that 1 day still takes its toll on our girls.

Re: If your mom or other family member watches your DC, do they listen to your wishes?

My mom watches DD 1x/week...she listens to me 90% of the time, but the rest doesn't bother me much cause she's a Ped, so I trust her judgement

Re: If your mom or other family member watches your DC, do they listen to your wishes?

I'm a SAHM so we're talking about occasional babysitting for a few hours, not full time care. But no, they don't listen to most of my wishes! They let my kids binge on sugar and I swear they've never said the word "no", lol. But I let it go-- who am I to complain, I'm getting free babysitting! If I were paying a sitter, I would lay down the law. But I think it's kind of ballsy to ask your family to watch your kids for free, and then dictate all sorts of rules.

Re: If your mom or other family member watches your DC, do they listen to your wishes?

yes she does....very lucky that way.

Re: If your mom or other family member watches your DC, do they listen to your wishes?

Re: If your mom or other family member watches your DC, do they listen to your wishes?

Re: If your mom or other family member watches your DC, do they listen to your wishes?

Message edited 12/17/2010 12:52:52 PM.

Re: If your mom or other family member watches your DC, do they listen to your wishes?

Re: If your mom or other family member watches your DC, do they listen to your wishes?

right now my inlaws are watching DS bc he is sick...he didn't eat breakfast bc he was not hungry ...so she gave him MM's for a snack... so no...they sometimes do not listen...

Re: If your mom or other family member watches your DC, do they listen to your wishes?

Hmm..this is tricky. My mother watches DS 2 days a week. The only thing i've really gotten flack about from both My mom and MIL is giving up the bottle at 1 year per the PED suggestion. DS is 14mo and still on them. by his 15mo visit i want him off. My mom and MIL were like "hes still a baby, why do they want to do it so soon." blah blah. My mom said "I know your dr. is so modern, but I dont get why they have to be off at 1yrs old."

(ever think Im F*** tired of making bottles for over a year..LOL)

She has given him juice or milk in a bottle, not a sippy cup like i asked. But I will say my mom is VERY good about keeping my routine and doing what I ask. THis bottle thing is going to be rough though.

Your mother should respect your wishes. He is your son, not her son to raise.