just read the saddest thing EVER..

baby London

just read the saddest thing EVER..

I saw this earlier and was crying my eyes out on the train... My heart goes out to that family. I hope and pray she is able to wake up on time to see her baby. So unbelievably sad...

just read the saddest thing EVER..

She is so strong. I could never...


How to say goodbye

this is heartwrenching...

Message edited 12/5/2012 9:54:26 PM.

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I will never be as strong and faithful as this young woman. I am so blessed to have 2 beautiful, healthy children. I wish no woman would have to go through what she is going through.

Re: just read the saddest thing EVER..

just read the saddest thing EVER..

can someone copy and paste the article? i don't have access to FB at work

just read the saddest thing EVER..

Oh my gosh, I can't even imagine! God bless this family

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just read the saddest thing EVER..

Oh my, I can't, so sad

Re: just read the saddest thing EVER..

Wow
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London's Birth Plan
by Alisa Turner on Wednesday, December 5, 2012 at 2:59pm ·
(This is the Birth Plan we wrote for London to give to the Doctors, Nurses and anyone there with us at the hospital. Many of you have asked how to especially pray more specifically on Friday during all the events that will take place, so I thought sharing this might help you know where potentially we will be at during the morning and day and what our needs might be at certain times)

LONDON DANIEL LARA'S
BIRTH PLAN


Our sweet son has been given the diagnosis of Anencephaly. We are aware it is a fatal diagnosis and understand that no lifesaving measures will be taken for him. I couldn't terminate my son. Though his life will only consist of the months he has spent in my womb and the few minutes to hours he may get on earth, it is of no less treasure to us. We have long awaited this day accompanied by dozens of emotions. We feel so honored to be his parents and its been amazing watching how he has touched the lives of so many without even being born. He will always be our son, our first born, and my constant inspiration in all that I do. He has taught me to love beyond condition beyond expectation beyond selfishness and I will forever be grateful.

Having Lyme Disease and Babesia has complicated this pregnancy and delivery. Only last year I was in the midst of a terrible relapse that caused me to loose all control of my body. I had a G-Tube as I had lost the ability to swallow, completely bed bound and dependent on my nurses and husband. I worked very hard to get back my independence and stability in health. Pregnancy was very far from our minds and timeline and it was quite shocking to hear the news I was carrying. Due to hormonal issues I was told for years I wouldn't be able to get pregnant without medical intervention. As we adjusted to the news, I got slammed with 5 months of severe morning sickness that lasted 24/7 and as well we were given the news of our sweet boys fatal diagnosis. We have done our very best to make the right decisions and focus on the positive but I know the day of delivery and days following are going to be very difficult and I just ask for everyones patience with us...




SURGERY and MEDS....

I know because of the damage that has been done to my Nervous System, that I will be having a C-Section under General Anesthesia by the Amazing Dr Syal. I know it is the best and safest thing for me and my Infectious Disease Doctor agrees as well. I do ask a few things though....

Im very sensitive to drugs, a little goes a long way with me. I would prefer to have as little amounts of anesthesia or pain meds as possible so that I will be able to wake up and see our son. I know that his time with us will be extremely short and understand there is a large chance I wont get to see him alive. But if anything can be done to lessen the grogginess of meds I would so appreciate that.
(I also do tend to get the shakes when waking up from surgery)

I would prefer not to be on morphine and maybe something just less overpowering and potent but again I do understand on the day of delivery some decisions might not be mine to make. Im typically quite stubborn with any kind of pain or sedative type med because it shuts down my brain as well as it takes weeks and weeks for my GI tract to recover. So please dont overmedicate me especially with anything to strong.

-PLEASE NO STEROIDS as it would be detrimental to my disease unless it is absolutely necessary.





WHEN LONDON IS BORN.....

I think the most critical time during our delivery day will be from the moment London is taken out, until his last breath. So that is the part of the plan I deeply hope can be followed through as best as possible.

From what Dr Syal told us, Jaime my husband will be waiting right outside the OR for London. When London is taken out of me, I do ask that he is cleaned off, suctioned and that his head be carefully wrapped in Vaseline Gauze and an extra layer of gauze on top of that. Also we prefer no ointment to be put over his eye's. If he is immediately struggling for breath or not breathing we do kindly ask for London to be given some temporary Oxygen to help initiate and stabilize breathing. We are fine with the ambu bag and supplemental oxygen but do not want anything too invasive or time consuming like chest compressions, IV's or things of that sort.
As quickly as possible we ask that he be handed to my husband. Then Jaime will walk back with London to what ever room has already been prepared for us. We will have 2 girls constantly with Jaime, One is the Photographer (Angelique) and the other will be the Videographer (Sarah). Where ever Jaime goes, they will be with him as well. Since I may not see London alive, we want to capture every moment.


As Jaime is walking back to the room with London, we want our Pastor Greg to already be in the room waiting for him. Greg is going to immediately baptize London. After that, Jaime has requested a few moments just him and London together. (Angelique and Sarah will still remain in the room capturing those moments). ALSO, I recorded a little video I want Jaime to play london during this time, if someone can remind him if her forgets that would be great, just want london to hear and be comforted by my voice

I know it is very hard to predict what will happen after that and plans may need to change depending on London's stability. If he seems somewhat stable in his breathing, we want people to come back to see him in 2 different groups just so it doesn't get too overwhelming in there. The first group of people to come back will be Esther, Danny, Joel, Eric, Kathy and Pat. Those people are our immediate family and we really want them to have a chance to see London alive if possible. (Jenn and Greg may also come back with family)

If London is doing ok, we are fine with family and friends holding him. If he continues to do ok and there are more people still in the waiting room, they may come back and see london as well. If the room gets to packed, perhaps some can wait just nearby the room, so Jaime doesn't get to overwhelmed and we have enough space for our photographer Angelique and videographer Sarah to capture everything.

Around this time I am hoping that I would start waking up in recovery. This will possibly be a very critical time as if London is still alive, I so desperately hope he can immediately be brought to me. Even if im groggy and wont remember it, I would so very much love for him to feel my love and warmth and to have pictures and video taken of those moments. If london is alive, we request that someone be able to help us communicate with a nurse in recovery so that Jaime and London along with Angelique and Sarah can immediately be brought to me in whatever state im in.

Even if london has shortly passed before I awake, I still would love for him to be brought to me in recovery right away, even just to feel his skin still warm.

As I previously said, I am very sensitive to drugs so I kindly ask that any extra pain or sedative type meds be held off for a while so I can come out of the surgery and have those moments with London as clear headed as im able to.

Once im stable and allowed to go back to the regular room, I want Jaime, London, Angelique and Sarah to be with me and have the room cleared out just for a little while so Jaime and I can have a few moments with london whether alive or not and have those moments captured. I know im going to be emotional and im ok with that. I do not want any extra sedative type meds to calm me down, please just let me process whats happening. I know London's home will inevitably be in the heavens and if he cant stay here with me in my arms, then I couldn't imagine a better place for him to go.

As Jaime and I have had some time just us, then we are fine with more visitors and from here on out we will just play it by ear..... and focus on London, keeping him warm and loved in our arms. We never want him taken out of our room and always want him to be in our arms or a family members.

I know a very small percentage of these babies do live anywhere from a number of hours to even sometimes a few days. Because I am having to deliver at 32 weeks, we know our chances of that are extremely slim. But if he is holding on to life, then we would ask that a nurse help us try to feed him. I know these babies cannot breast-feed very well so perhaps we can try a dropper or something along those lines, just to give him comfort care.... We have a number of outfits we will bring and at some point would like to dress him in a few and take a number of pictures but I was prepared to do that after his passing, as while he is alive I dont want to mess with too many extra things. I would rather him just be held and comforted. But later in the day if he has passed, we have a few things we want to do with him like the hand/feet molds and outfits and and possibly bathe him....





WHEN LONDON PASSES....

I am not sure when that will happen, so its a little hard to figure out whats best for those moments. We would love for a nurse to be with us or close by just to let Jaime and or I know that londons time is near. We have been told his breathing will get more and more shallow but it would probably help us just to have someone walk us through those last moments of his life as we feel a bit nervous and unprepared for what that will feel like or look like. If im not awake yet and London passes away, please please make sure my husband is comforted whether by the nurse or family or our pastor.... I am not sure if Jaime will prefer less people in there during that time or more, you may just need to ask him in the moment. My husbands heart is so big and tender and I just want it to be comforted if I cant be there yet.

We have requested that London stay with us for at least 24 hours. I so badly want to sleep through the night with him in my arms. The following day we will call the funeral home for them to come pick him up. That will be by far the hardest moment of my life. Even though I know he will of already passed, ive gotten so use to always having him with me, in my womb all these months and then my arms.... So we just ask for patience, love and support during that time on saturday.





END OF LIFE CARE
-We are not wanting any kind of autopsy done on London.
-Because of the chance of Lyme or Babesia being transmitted, we are not going to be donating his organs.
-And as i mentioned, we have already made arrangements with a funeral home and they will be called sometime on Saturday to come get London.






A Few Extra Notes....

If im dealing with nausea/vomitting Please *****NO PHENERGAN***** as I have had bad reactions to it in the past. Im ok with Zofran but, it will make me drowsy as all these meds do so depending on how things are going I just want to make the call of having something or not.

I do have food allergies (Gluten, Dairy and Soy) so we will be bringing a lot of my own food with us. I know the first day or two should be a liquid base diet.

I have my own Port-a-Cath that im hoping we can mainly use for everything. My veins are non-exsistent and WILL blow. Ive been stuck so many times over the past 5 years and would love to prevent any extra problems with IV's during our stay.

I am EXTREMELY Allergic to Tegaderm. Within minutes I WILL blister, it is awful...

I will also be bringing all my regular daily meds (thyroid-seizure-antibiotics-immune ect....) I will go over with the nurse what im taking and make sure it doesnt interact with what they gave me from surgery ect...




ENDING NOTES......

We are praying and hoping I will be released by Monday. Many of our family members are flying back out on Tuesday, so we wanted to have a small funeral for London Monday whenever im released. If there is anything we can do to make that happen that would be so wonderful.

Im sorry this is so long. I know its not a typical way of writing out a birth plan. I hope it all makes sense. PLease know that our hearts are fragile but we stand strong in our love for London and his purpose in this life. We hope to follow this birth plan as best as possible but again also knowing that we have no way to predict how long london will be with us or any extra unplanned events. We will try to be as flexible as we can with changes or things that need to happen differently if there is a need for that.

From the bottom of our hearts, thank you to every Doctor, Nurse and anyone else helping us through this time. We are so thankful!!!

Message edited 12/6/2012 10:16:51 AM.

Re: just read the saddest thing EVER..

I know it would never be enough but I hope her birth plan is everything she hopes.

It's tomorrow.

Re: just read the saddest thing EVER..

I know! I saw this, I think on Easton's page. I can't get it out of head. She is SO SO strong.

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I read this last night and was in complete tears and just so sad. This woman is amazing and the strength she has is unreal!

I pray that her birth plan goes as she wants it to and that she holds onto the strength she has shown thus far.

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I couldn't get past that the baby had Anecephaly-once I read that, I couldn't read anymore. My first DS had it, and I cannot imagine her having to even think about making a birth plan for her sweet angel.

Many prayers for London and his family. May London know the love that surrounds him, and the gentle touch of his mother.

(and now I'm crying.)

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I can't even imagine....

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just read the saddest thing EVER..

OMG....This article has me crying, I could never imagine having to go through this..............

Re: just read the saddest thing EVER..

just read the saddest thing EVER..

i just read this and honestly this is the saddest thing i have ever read. i don't think my pregnancy hormones are helping the situation either right now...i can not even imagine what she and her husband must be getting ready to go through. I truly hope and pray she is able to wake up in time to see her son alive

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I can't even handle this. I am crying my eyes out

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Im so sad over this. I am following her page. Her and her family will be in my thoughts all day tomorrow. I she gets to see her sweet boy before he passes.

just read the saddest thing EVER..

Saddest thing... I made it pretty far without crying until DH asked me what I was reading and then I lost it! I pray she is able to wake up to see him alive.

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Lord have mercy. I can't get past having the priest there.

God bless this little baby and his family.