Keeping treatment a secret

Has anyone kept treatment a secret from extended family? I don't want to create expectations or feel the need to deal with constant questions and provide status reports. I'm just wondering if its possible to keep such a big thing from extended family...

Keeping treatment a secret

We didn't tell anyone other than people that had to know. When things progressed to ivf and I had retrievals and transfers I told my bosses at work. Other than that nobody knew.

Do what works for you.

Re: Keeping treatment a secret

I'm doing IVF and kept it super secret the first round, but during the second I was a little more relaxed about it. I left out some medications and syringe packages and my mom came over and saw them and asked what it was. I couldn't think of anything to say fast enough and didn't want her to think I had a health issue so I just said, "Surprise! I'm doing IVF!" I then explained I haven't shared the news because I didn't want the pressure of family members wondering how things are going and inquiring about it. She's been great about not asking me about it but I do imagine her and my sisters are talking and wondering amongst themselves.

Re: Keeping treatment a secret

Our parents and my sister knew. We didn't tell our extended family. I'm not sure who you mean by "extended" family. IF is very stressful, so you do want some emotional support outside of each other (husband/wife) IMO.

Keeping treatment a secret

We didn't tell ANYONE not even our parents. The only person that knew was my boss because I had so many day time appointments and she would let me leave without docking my time. After I got pregnant we told my parents at 5 weeks and they and my brother are still the only family and friends that know we used treatments. If it were me, I wouldn't care who knows and who doesn't I'm open about that stuff but DH doesn't want anyone knowing and I respect is wishes even if I don't agree

Keeping treatment a secret

We did our first round and it sucked. The next round we told immediate family. Round 3, I told everyone.

Keeping treatment a secret

No one in my life ever knew I was having treatment. This board was the first time I really started talking about it, but not to friends or family

I went through my treatments solo

Message edited 11/7/2016 8:21:27 PM.

Keeping treatment a secret

First round for dd#1 no one knew except my boss. This time my best friends knew and that's it.

Re: Keeping treatment a secret

our parents knew, my boss knew b/c I had to use time for appointments, very close coworkers that went through IVF knew and our siblings. Extended family, not so much.

Its really up to you. do what you feel comfortable with.

Re: Keeping treatment a secret

When I was going through treatment we told absolutely no one. No parents, no siblings, nada. It was the two of us. Once we were pregnant we told immediate family. Now we are very open about our fertility struggles.

Re: Keeping treatment a secret

Absolutely no need for anyone to know. Kept it a secret, even told none to very limited info to my mother because I just found I got frustrated more than it was worth.

Message edited 11/7/2016 11:13:02 PM.

Keeping treatment a secret

We didn't tell anyone. I ended up getting upset at my parents because they stressed me out with their stuff (not knowing what I was going through). At that point, I decided if I ever do IVF again, my parents would know- that way they can offer help and support.