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Kids won't stay in their own beds STILL!!!

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CaidensMommy
My 3 Miracles!

Member since 5/05

5777 total posts

Name:
Melissa

Kids won't stay in their own beds STILL!!!

Ok, they're 6.5 and 4 yrs old. What gives??? They either both come into our bed, or one or the other, etc. My DH and I, more me, can't get any sleep! Chat Icon Chat Icon My DH has half the bed and then I have 1 or 2 kids on my side and I'm on the edge constantly. I'm also 7.5-8 months PG so that doesn't help. I try to bring them into their own bed, but when I do, they come back in. Chat Icon Any suggestions??? Then if miraculously the kids stay in their bed, then my DH wakes me up! Chat Icon I need sleep. For years I've only been getting about 4-5 hours of sleep a night, seriously! Chat Icon

TIA!

Posted 9/24/10 8:19 AM
 

MrsSchwags
Soccer Baseball Lax Mom

Member since 10/05

11240 total posts

Name:
Jennifer

Re: Kids won't stay in their own beds STILL!!!

I have no advice but I would really love to hear some. My 3 and 4 year old are the same way.

Posted 9/24/10 11:10 AM
 

Michelle
My Little Yankee Fans

Member since 1/06

4018 total posts

Name:

Re: Kids won't stay in their own beds STILL!!!

They come into bed because you let them. Put them back into their own beds and/or take something away that will mean something to them if they don't stay in bed. Or reward them when they stay in the bed.

Posted 9/24/10 12:14 PM
 

Elizabeth
Mom of Three

Member since 9/05

7900 total posts

Name:
"MOMMY!!!"

Re: Kids won't stay in their own beds STILL!!!

Posted by Michelle

They come into bed because you let them. Put them back into their own beds and/or take something away that will mean something to them if they don't stay in bed. Or reward them when they stay in the bed.



Exactly. As my Mother says "You are the parent, you're in charge" (Chat Icon I hate when I quote my Mother)

My 4 year old comes into our bed in the night quite a bit. I don't know if it's bc he's my baby and my last or bc he's so cuddly but I love when he comes in. He can be put back in his bed though. My DH hates when he comes in so he goes back most of the time unless DH is working. He even covers me with his blanket. So cute. But I don't know if I'd love it if I was 8m preg and not getting enough sleep.

I'd start with a reward - something small. The first few nights you (or better - DH) will have to bring them back and remind them they can get the reward in the AM. Really small reward, maybe get a few small toys at the dollar store or Target $1 area and put them all in a box for them to choose from. Even get something cheaper like a $1 item that has a few toys that you can open so there are more rewards in the reward box and it's so it's ultra inexpensive. It doesnt have to be big to make an impact. If they get a week or 10 days straight let them get something a little bigger - McDonalds, or movie night with sleeping bags in LR, toy under $5, something they choose. I'd do the punishment only if the rewards are not working. Some kids need the punishment part but I'd try the reward first.

Message edited 9/24/2010 12:48:01 PM.

Posted 9/24/10 12:40 PM
 

MrsGmomof3
...

Member since 6/08

3290 total posts

Name:
Irrelevant

Re: Kids won't stay in their own beds STILL!!!

My kids start out in their own beds, and every night SOMEONE ends up in our bed. We have a king size bed, so we let them stay. My oldest one stopped when he turned 6, now I have my 5 year old and 3 year old. I know that they will stop wanting to sleep with us "some day", so for now, its a non-issue for us. Chat Icon

Posted 9/24/10 1:40 PM
 

dawnygirl25
Growing up soo fast..

Member since 1/06

14917 total posts

Name:
Dawn

Re: Kids won't stay in their own beds STILL!!!

Posted by Michelle

They come into bed because you let them. Put them back into their own beds and/or take something away that will mean something to them if they don't stay in bed. Or reward them when they stay in the bed.



I agree.Chat Icon

DD is 4 and has never gotten out of her bed. she knows its not allowed and is unacceptable. You need them to realize its bad behavior and punish when they play that game...or reward for them staying put. I hope you get some sleep soon.Chat Icon

Posted 9/24/10 5:58 PM
 

monkeybride
My Everything

Member since 5/05

20541 total posts

Name:

Re: Kids won't stay in their own beds STILL!!!

DD sleeps with me and DH sleeps in her bed. I'm no help. Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon
And for those of you who say to just say it's not allowed, punish, etc. That doesn't always work. We've tried it all and honestly I've just given up. I can't listen to the crying and screaming in the middle of the night. At least this way we all sleep.

Posted 9/25/10 1:57 AM
 

Janice
Sweet Jessie Quinn

Member since 5/05

27567 total posts

Name:
Janice

Re: Kids won't stay in their own beds STILL!!!

my mother kept 7 of us out of her bed.
we were told if we open the door, we will see 2 naked people.

yeah, we never opened the doorChat Icon

Posted 9/25/10 12:35 PM
 

PatsBrat
LIF Adult

Member since 10/06

2326 total posts

Name:
Ms. Brat

Re: Kids won't stay in their own beds STILL!!!

Posted by Michelle

They come into bed because you let them. Put them back into their own beds and/or take something away that will mean something to them if they don't stay in bed. Or reward them when they stay in the bed.



I agree 100%.

Posted 9/25/10 2:03 PM
 

dawnygirl25
Growing up soo fast..

Member since 1/06

14917 total posts

Name:
Dawn

Re: Kids won't stay in their own beds STILL!!!

Posted by monkeybride

DD sleeps with me and DH sleeps in her bed. I'm no help. Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon
And for those of you who say to just say it's not allowed, punish, etc. That doesn't always work. We've tried it all and honestly I've just given up. I can't listen to the crying and screaming in the middle of the night. At least this way we all sleep.



this is exactly right. its why people bring their kids in their bed. They dont want to hear the crying and yelling. However, if you delalt with it for a few nights....you could all go back to sleeping in your own beds and having a good nights sleep. They know they are allowed in your bed so of course they want to. JMO

Posted 9/25/10 8:41 PM
 

Michelle
My Little Yankee Fans

Member since 1/06

4018 total posts

Name:

Re: Kids won't stay in their own beds STILL!!!

Posted by dawnygirl25

Posted by monkeybride

DD sleeps with me and DH sleeps in her bed. I'm no help. Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon
And for those of you who say to just say it's not allowed, punish, etc. That doesn't always work. We've tried it all and honestly I've just given up. I can't listen to the crying and screaming in the middle of the night. At least this way we all sleep.



this is exactly right. its why people bring their kids in their bed. They dont want to hear the crying and yelling. However, if you delalt with it for a few nights....you could all go back to sleeping in your own beds and having a good nights sleep. They know they are allowed in your bed so of course they want to. JMO



I agree, if you deal with it and not give up, you will have much better results.

Posted 9/26/10 8:48 AM
 

InShock
life is good

Member since 10/06

9258 total posts

Name:

Re: Kids won't stay in their own beds STILL!!!

We were having major issues with my DD coming into our room recently (she's 3) and I ended up locking our bedroom door so she couldn't get in. It was sort of a CIO technique but it WORKED. She now knows that she stays in her room/bed until the sun comes up and then she can come up to our room. I admit we did have a couple of really bad (sleepless) nights, but we're now back in a really good place sleeping wise so it was worth it in the end.

Posted 9/26/10 9:37 AM
 

Elizabeth
Mom of Three

Member since 9/05

7900 total posts

Name:
"MOMMY!!!"

Re: Kids won't stay in their own beds STILL!!!

Posted by dawnygirl25

Posted by monkeybride

DD sleeps with me and DH sleeps in her bed. I'm no help. Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon
And for those of you who say to just say it's not allowed, punish, etc. That doesn't always work. We've tried it all and honestly I've just given up. I can't listen to the crying and screaming in the middle of the night. At least this way we all sleep.



this is exactly right. its why people bring their kids in their bed. They dont want to hear the crying and yelling. However, if you delalt with it for a few nights....you could all go back to sleeping in your own beds and having a good nights sleep. They know they are allowed in your bed so of course they want to. JMO



Most of the time. I just love his snuggly-ness. Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 9/26/10 10:20 AM
 

rojerono
Happiest.

Member since 8/06

13803 total posts

Name:
Jeannie

Re: Kids won't stay in their own beds STILL!!!

I co-slept with both kids .. for longer than most find acceptable!Chat Icon

We do a family cuddle before bedtime. Everyone in our bed where we talk and tell stories and do tickles and giggle.. and get out all of the mush before they go to their own beds. I think that helps.

My boys STILL will wander in sometimes in the middle of the night. They love us and they feel secure near us. And it doesn't bother us to have them there once in a while. They know that they are welcome in our bed any time they feel anxious or sick or just need an extra cuddle. I think the knowledge that it isn't 'forbidden' makes it easier for them. But if it becomes habitual (they come in 2 or more nights in a row) then they lose that open door privilege and any time they wander in they get immediately escorted out. It's not fun - but the more consistent you are, the easier it gets.

Posted 9/26/10 6:13 PM
 

monkeybride
My Everything

Member since 5/05

20541 total posts

Name:

Re: Kids won't stay in their own beds STILL!!!

Posted by dawnygirl25

Posted by monkeybride

DD sleeps with me and DH sleeps in her bed. I'm no help. Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon
And for those of you who say to just say it's not allowed, punish, etc. That doesn't always work. We've tried it all and honestly I've just given up. I can't listen to the crying and screaming in the middle of the night. At least this way we all sleep.



this is exactly right. its why people bring their kids in their bed. They dont want to hear the crying and yelling. However, if you delalt with it for a few nights....you could all go back to sleeping in your own beds and having a good nights sleep. They know they are allowed in your bed so of course they want to. JMO



I get what you're saying but it doesn't always work.
I have tried it. I have let my daughter scream and cry for over an hour. She's would sit there and do it until the sun rose. I just think different kids have different needs. My DD used to sleep fine. For some reason she needs me more than ever now and I've just decided it comes with the territory. It won't be forever. I guess maybe I'm more lenient too because I slept with my mom for a long time after my parents got divorced.

Posted 9/27/10 12:07 AM
 

luvsun27
Check out my cool glasses

Member since 5/05

8135 total posts

Name:
Kim

Re: Kids won't stay in their own beds STILL!!!

Get this clock..it has saved me Chat Icon I have it set for 6:45, so DD knows that she can't come to my room until it turns GREEN. It's called the Teach Me Time Alarm Clock. I don't have the alarm set, just the nightlight part.

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Message edited 9/28/2010 1:09:19 PM.

Posted 9/28/10 1:08 PM
 
 

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