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Letter I Wish I Could Send...Feel Free To Include Yours

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Stacey1403
Where it all began....

Member since 5/05

24065 total posts

Name:

Re: Letter I Wish I Could Send...Feel Free To Include Yours

Dear Unborn Child,

Why is it that you feel the need to make Mommy so sick she has to throw up 3 times a week and feel nauseous 24/7. I promise if you stop this I will give you cookies when ever you want.

Love,
Your very barfy Mommy

Posted 5/10/06 1:14 PM
 
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LadyMaravilla
Fall Is Here

Member since 5/05

12023 total posts

Name:
Sonia

Re: Letter I Wish I Could Send...Feel Free To Include Yours

Posted by MsMBV

Dear DH:

Please stop eating cr@ppy foods & get your self under control. I know that it is you farting and not the dogs, and to be honest, the dogs are not going to take it anymore. You embarrass them by blaming them for the wretched stench coming from your a$$.

Fascinus wants you to know that the next time you blame him for your nasty smells, he will pee on you.

Signed,
You are lucky that love is unconditional



Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 5/10/06 1:30 PM
 

pmpkn087
Life is good...

Member since 9/05

18504 total posts

Name:
Stephanie

Re: Letter I Wish I Could Send...Feel Free To Include Yours

Posted by Janice

Posted by JRG71

Posted by nrthshgrl

Dear Boss,

You may be curious as to why your travel plans always work out to afternoon flights.

No, it's not because the other earlier flights were so expensive. It's because I try to keep you in the air betwen 3-5pm so we can leave early.

Signed,
Your trusted worker



LMFAO!!!!!! Chat Icon

OMG!!

This is the greatest and most truthful thing I have ever heard!! I love itChat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon



Chat Icon Chat Icon

I do the same thing.

Posted 5/10/06 1:32 PM
 

LadyMaravilla
Fall Is Here

Member since 5/05

12023 total posts

Name:
Sonia

Re: Letter I Wish I Could Send...Feel Free To Include Yours

Dear Boss,

You may be curious as to why your travel plans always work out to afternoon flights.

No, it's not because the other earlier flights were so expensive. It's because I try to keep you in the air betwen 3-5pm so we can leave early.

Signed,
Your trusted worker


LMFAO!!!!!! Chat Icon
OMG!!

This is the greatest and most truthful thing I have ever heard!! I love itChat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon


Chat Icon Chat Icon

I do the same thing.


Now imagine if you two worked for the same company...Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 5/10/06 1:34 PM
 

Snozberry
I might steal your diamonds

Member since 2/06

4680 total posts

Name:
Melissa

Re: Letter I Wish I Could Send...Feel Free To Include Yours

Posted by MsMBV

Dear DH:

Please stop eating cr@ppy foods & get your self under control. I know that it is you farting and not the dogs, and to be honest, the dogs are not going to take it anymore. You embarrass them by blaming them for the wretched stench coming from your a$$.

Fascinus wants you to know that the next time you blame him for your nasty smells, he will pee on you.

Signed,
You are lucky that love is unconditional



PIMP Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 5/10/06 1:38 PM
 

Lisa
I'm a PANK!!!

Member since 5/05

22334 total posts

Name:
Professional Aunts No Kids

Re: Letter I Wish I Could Send...Feel Free To Include Yours

Posted by JRG71

Posted by nrthshgrl

Dear Boss,

You may be curious as to why your travel plans always work out to afternoon flights.

No, it's not because the other earlier flights were so expensive. It's because I try to keep you in the air betwen 3-5pm so we can leave early.

Signed,
Your trusted worker



LMFAO!!!!!! Chat Icon

.


Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 5/10/06 1:39 PM
 

Lisa
I'm a PANK!!!

Member since 5/05

22334 total posts

Name:
Professional Aunts No Kids

Re: Letter I Wish I Could Send...Feel Free To Include Yours

Posted by MsMBV

Dear DH:

Please stop eating cr@ppy foods & get your self under control. I know that it is you farting and not the dogs, and to be honest, the dogs are not going to take it anymore. You embarrass them by blaming them for the wretched stench coming from your a$$.

Fascinus wants you to know that the next time you blame him for your nasty smells, he will pee on you.

Signed,
You are lucky that love is unconditional



Holy crap!! I am dying here!!

Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 5/10/06 1:43 PM
 

Janice
Sweet Jessie Quinn

Member since 5/05

27567 total posts

Name:
Janice

Re: Letter I Wish I Could Send...Feel Free To Include Yours

alexandria-Chat Icon Chat Icon I hate you went through that and that it is still happening.

Posted 5/10/06 1:44 PM
 

Luvlylady
Earned My Bragging Rights!

Member since 5/05

6141 total posts

Name:
Alexandria

Re: Letter I Wish I Could Send...Feel Free To Include Yours

Posted by Janice

alexandria-Chat Icon Chat Icon I hate you went through that and that it is still happening.


Thank-You Janice(That was my Mother's name alsoChat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 5/10/06 1:56 PM
 

SoinLove
Making big changes

Member since 5/05

16541 total posts

Name:
Kristin

Re: Letter I Wish I Could Send...Feel Free To Include Yours

Dear Landlady,
Stop screaming at your 2-year old that you're going to punch her in the mouth/kill her if she doesn't shut up. Don't you realize I can hear every word you say when you yell like that?Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Signed,
Ready to call CPS

Posted 5/10/06 2:01 PM
 

LadyMaravilla
Fall Is Here

Member since 5/05

12023 total posts

Name:
Sonia

Re: Letter I Wish I Could Send...Feel Free To Include Yours

Posted by SoinLove

Dear Landlady,
Stop screaming at your 2-year old that you're going to punch her in the mouth/kill her if she doesn't shut up. Don't you realize I can hear every word you say when you yell like that?Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Signed,
Ready to call CPS




Oh my GOD!!!!!! What a bee-otch!!!! Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 5/10/06 2:02 PM
 

Beth
The Key to your new home....

Member since 2/06

24849 total posts

Name:
Beth

Re: Letter I Wish I Could Send...Feel Free To Include Yours

Dear Husband,

Stop eating my weight watchers desserts- they are all I look forward to after spending 90 minutes at the gym

and Furthmore- when you do eat them- don't leave the empty box in the freezer- so that I don't realize they are gone until I go to eat one

the disappiontment drives me over the edge

I can put up with you leaving dirty clothers all over the house- but this is a deal breaker

thank you
your wife

Posted 5/10/06 2:05 PM
 

Beth
The Key to your new home....

Member since 2/06

24849 total posts

Name:
Beth

Re: Letter I Wish I Could Send...Feel Free To Include Yours

ok one more- this really helps me


Dear Brother,

I love you dearly - however you are 26 years old and enaged- would it be possible for you to hold a job for at least 6 months in a row!!!!!

Mom and Dad paid for 5 years of college for you- and if Mom were still alive she would be telling you the same thing

Drinking a beer in the hot tub- does not count as looking for a job

Dad should no longer have to give you money

If I were your WF- I would have seriously reservations about marrying you and getting stuck being the main and only bread winner

Grow up- sit in a cubicle - WE ALL DO

welcome to the real world
love
your sister who has a work ethic

Posted 5/10/06 2:09 PM
 

mommy2bella
Where does time go?

Member since 12/05

9747 total posts

Name:
Kelly

Re: Letter I Wish I Could Send...Feel Free To Include Yours

Dear CRAZY, COMMITABLE SIL,

Am I glad you are on meds? Yes. But I will never forget all the horrible, mean things you said about me (never to my face) and the fact that you questioned my love for DH before we were married. You almost ruined my wedding day, but I have many people in my life that love DH and I...it's not our fault you "feel alone"

You are miserable because you had 3 kids in 1 year...it's called birth control if you can't afford the ones you already had. I am sorry you feel like you are poor, it ain't like DH and I are living the high life...I only started to talk to you because DH was so sad about not seeing his nieces and we wanted our daughter to grow up knowing them. You said you hated me and that I ruined DH's life but now you asked your mom last week if I would HANG OUT WITH YOU? You might want to up the meds. I am sorry you have no friends or family other than your mom...that's your fault.

Do I feel bad that your DH is living at his mom's the past 3 weeks because he is acting like a piece of Sh!t...yes, but grow a set of B A L L S and make him lift a G-D-damm finger...we can't hang out with you every weekend because your lonely because I don't like you and you don't take your kids outside! I am sorry your brother is 20X the man you married, but he's mineChat Icon

And yes, we are incredibly happy, you didn't have to sound so shocked when you told my friend at Bella's christening

Sincerely,
Your evil, "career-driven SIL that apparently doesn't love her DH "enough"

PS...You are fat because you eat too much and never leave the house, please don't tell MIL you are jealous of "how" I lost all my PG weight so quickly--I just eat like a normal
person.

I FEEL SO CLEANSED!

Posted 5/10/06 2:29 PM
 

LadyMaravilla
Fall Is Here

Member since 5/05

12023 total posts

Name:
Sonia

Re: Letter I Wish I Could Send...Feel Free To Include Yours

Posted by mommy2bellabean

Dear CRAZY, COMMITABLE SIL,

Am I glad you are on meds? Yes. But I will never forget all the horrible, mean things you said about me (never to my face) and the fact that you questioned my love for DH before we were married. You almost ruined my wedding day, but I have many people in my life that love DH and I...it's not our fault you "feel alone"

You are miserable because you had 3 kids in 1 year...it's called birth control if you can't afford the ones you already had. I am sorry you feel like you are poor, it ain't like DH and I are living the high life...I only started to talk to you because DH was so sad about not seeing his nieces and we wanted our daughter to grow up knowing them. You said you hated me and that I ruined DH's life but now you asked your mom last week if I would HANG OUT WITH YOU? You might want to up the meds. I am sorry you have no friends or family other than your mom...that's your fault.

Do I feel bad that your DH is living at his mom's the past 3 weeks because he is acting like a piece of Sh!t...yes, but grow a set of B A L L S and make him lift a G-D-damm finger...we can't hang out with you every weekend because your lonely because I don't like you and you don't take your kids outside! I am sorry your brother is 20X the man you married, but he's mineChat Icon

And yes, we are incredibly happy, you didn't have to sound so shocked when you told my friend at Bella's christening

Sincerely,
Your evil, "career-driven SIL that apparently doesn't love her DH "enough"

PS...You are fat because you eat too much and never leave the house, please don't tell MIL you are jealous of "how" I lost all my PG weight so quickly--I just eat like a normal
person.

I FEEL SO CLEANSED!



Whoa Nelly........Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 5/10/06 2:32 PM
 

mommy2bella
Where does time go?

Member since 12/05

9747 total posts

Name:
Kelly

Re: Letter I Wish I Could Send...Feel Free To Include Yours

Posted by LadyLainez


Whoa Nelly........Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon



Am I horrible?

Posted 5/10/06 2:34 PM
 

Juliet
Family is Complete!

Member since 5/05

5913 total posts

Name:
Juliet

Re: Letter I Wish I Could Send...Feel Free To Include Yours

Dear punk kid next door who robbed us:

Congratulations on being so clever in climbing down into our condo unit through the attic and stealing our belongings. The idea was ingenius. Too bad you got caught. If you would kindly pay us back all that you took, as well as pay for the damages you caused while breaking in, we may let you live with your parents.

Sincerely,

the neighbors whose stuff you stole.

PS when we say we want everything returned, we mean everything, including the single malt scotch and bottle of Pepsi.

Message edited 5/10/2006 2:36:13 PM.

Posted 5/10/06 2:34 PM
 

nov04libride
big brother <3

Member since 5/05

14672 total posts

Name:
Me

Re: Letter I Wish I Could Send...Feel Free To Include Yours

Dear BIL,
Do you really think I can forgive you after you wrote, "It's like you went out of your way to **** both of us over. Maybe you just don't know how to be part of a family, coming from a broken one. I won't speculate any further.
It's a shame my best friend in the whole world, my brother, had to........ nevermind. Sometimes you have to know when to keep your mouth shut. Take that lesson and run with it." Yes, your psycho baby momma made up a whoollleee lot of sh!t and you believed her. And got back together with her after filing the order of protection with the police. To talk about MY family!!!! And then act like everything is well and good and all four of us should go to a concert together? I may forgive but I will never forget. Take THAT lesson and run with it .

Message edited 5/10/2006 2:39:26 PM.

Posted 5/10/06 2:38 PM
 

mommy2bella
Where does time go?

Member since 12/05

9747 total posts

Name:
Kelly

Re: Letter I Wish I Could Send...Feel Free To Include Yours

Posted by Juliet

PS when we say we want everything returned, we mean everything, including the single malt scotch and bottle of Pepsi.



Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon OMG! TOO FUNNY! I betcha he wishes he preferred Coca-Cola now.

Posted 5/10/06 2:41 PM
 

Juliet
Family is Complete!

Member since 5/05

5913 total posts

Name:
Juliet

Re: Letter I Wish I Could Send...Feel Free To Include Yours

Dear IL's

So now that you are moving back to Poland in two weeks, does this mean that I will not have to endure phone calls from you at all hours of the day and night? Maybe I will even get to enjoy my DH and not feel that I must sacrifice my DH to help you with stupid stuff. I don't hate you, but you are the same age as my parents (same birth years and everything) but you act 20 years older and incapable of taking care of yourself. Your son doesn't need to come over to fix things after he has worked all day. You are intelligent people. Don't play dumb so your son will do it for you.

Yes, we will come visit you in Poland, but no, not every year. But when you come to visit us, you cannot stay for more than a week. I don't care what your friends think! You will need your privacy as much as we will.

Sincerely,

your American DIL

Posted 5/10/06 2:43 PM
 

reggie
I love my boys!!

Member since 5/05

8044 total posts

Name:

Re: Letter I Wish I Could Send...Feel Free To Include Yours

Dear ***** of a Witch,

YOu hate me because I am not scared of you.
THere is finally someone who opens her mouth to you. Kiss my ***. You ****!!!Chat Icon Chat Icon

Love,

your daughter in law.

Posted 5/10/06 2:43 PM
 

Blu-ize
Plan B is Now Plan A

Member since 7/05

32475 total posts

Name:
Susan

Re: Letter I Wish I Could Send...Feel Free To Include Yours

Posted by june262004

Posted by Luvlylady

Dear Dad,
Losing Mom was probably as hard for you as it was for us!You were only 28 and had to take care of 2 little girls(6-7)who lost their Mommy!
You went to work everyday and went to school at night to better yourself,which you did!
But not even 6 months after Mom has passed you are remarrying a woman who has never had any kids of her own,she was great at first.
But after she had her 1st child with you she became abusive(Mentally & PhysicallyChat Icon )
You knew of the horrible chilhood we endured and never did anything to protect us!!!!!!
You had another child w/her and here you are almost 30 years later still married to her and haven't even come to see me or talk to me for almost 10 yearsChat Icon
I hate her so much and part of me hates you for the Choices you have made!
The woman you married could never replace my Mother!
She is also sooooo Jealous she never let my Dad take us to the cemetary,she would say We are feeling sorry for ourselves!
My Dad would sometimes sneak us thereChat Icon
She is Jealous of a woman who isn't even alive anymore!
I could go on & on but I am in tears typing this!
I may really send this letter!



OMG IM SO SORRY Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon


I think sending the letter would be good!



So sorry..so very sorry...Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 5/10/06 2:43 PM
 

lucyloo
nope

Member since 1/06

9758 total posts

Name:

Re: Letter I Wish I Could Send...Feel Free To Include Yours

Dear Katie,
Stop eating everything. When you steal an unedible object and I catch you, it is not a game. Do not run under the bed as fast as you can and bark at me as if it mock me. Although you see no harm in it, paint chips, screws, nails, ant traps are all bad for you. Stop crying when I lock you in the kitchen. I do it because I can't keep my eye on you at that moment and don't want you to get into trouble. It's not like you have no toys.
Stop digging holes to get under the fence. The only thing on the other side is the dog catcher and he wants to take you to the pound where there is no Kong or Rufus.
Sneaking up behind me and barking as loud as you can is not funny, it's mean.
Stop rolling in the dirt after I give you a bath.

Love,
Mommy

Posted 5/10/06 2:46 PM
 

reggie
I love my boys!!

Member since 5/05

8044 total posts

Name:

Re: Letter I Wish I Could Send...Feel Free To Include Yours

Dear Monster in law,

You love coupons so much. I used to trap and fix feral cats. So how does this sound?? I will
get my old cat trap out, sprinkle coupons in it. You will get all excited, crawl in to get them. The door will slam shut and I will ship you out to sea.

Posted 5/10/06 2:46 PM
 

LadyMaravilla
Fall Is Here

Member since 5/05

12023 total posts

Name:
Sonia

Re: Letter I Wish I Could Send...Feel Free To Include Yours

Posted by regi

Dear Monster in law,

You love coupons so much. I used to trap and fix feral cats. So how does this sound?? I will
get my old cat trap out, sprinkle coupons in it. You will get all excited, crawl in to get them. The door will slam shut and I will ship you out to sea.



Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Reminds me of a Tom & Jerry episode!

Posted 5/10/06 2:50 PM
 
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