Meltdowns and starting school

Hi there, I have a 3 yo with cerebral palsy and sensory processing disorder starting school in September (brookville marcus ace.) he is definitely ready and really needs the structure and routine. So on that hand I am excited. But I am also terrified because he has apoplectic meltdowns whenever we go somewhere new or whenever I leave him. Like, head banging, back arching, shrieking, screaming, vomiting etc. think "the exorcist" lol. it's bad and it's exhausting and it goes on for a long time. Even when family or sitters he is well acquainted with come over. Just the other day my Neice who he knows well came over so I could shower for an event. He literally screamed and cried and ranted until we gave up and put him in his crib - the only place he would calm down . I am just afraid, what if they can't handle him at school? Do they "have to" handle him no matter what? Will they be calling me every day because he is inconsolable? I plan to stay close the first month or so but would like to go back to work, gym etc and just don't know what the policies are in situations like this? Before we were aware of the extent of his issues we tried putting him in a non-special needs two year old program and he lasted two weeks before they told us they couldn't handle him. I am hoping that a special school is a better fit, but still, what if they just can't handle him?

Message edited 8/12/2015 9:19:10 PM.

Re: Meltdowns and starting school

I have a sister who was mentally challenged and had to go to a special needs school .... I have been in contact with kids that seem to be similar to your child. If they know what he does and accepted him into their program they should be able to handle him. They might even help you and make suggestions/ help set up a behavioral modification plan.

My son has had more than often meltdowns...perhaps not has serious as yours but I can understand your concerns. Good luck...I hope everything works out for you.

Re: Meltdowns and starting school

My DS also thrives on routine. He started at a full day program after he turned 2 through EI. I used to drop him off in the morning and the first few days he was screaming/crying but then it became part of his routine. Same thing happened this summer when I started putting him on a bus to school. The first day was a disaster. By the end of the week he was OK. Actually one day last week I had to keep him home since he was sick, when the bus drove away after I told them DS was sick he started crying! I couldn't believe it. He is starting the pre-k program in the fall with a new teacher and classroom and he will probably give them a bit of a hard time the first few days as well until he gets used to them and his new environment.

Anyway I guess my point is, it will be rough for a few days in the beginning but before you know it, it will become routine for them and all will be OK.

ETA and the school should know how to deal with behaviors like this.

Message edited 8/13/2015 12:09:15 PM.

Re: Meltdowns and starting school

He is special needs and was accepted in their program. They will accept him and help him deal with the behavior. If you have any tips for them, pass them along like even if he has a stuffed animal or something from home that can help him, send it with him.

My son also went to a typical school and didn't last 2 weeks. They called me every day that he was screaming, throwing things, and he even slapped the teacher once. I had to come pick him up every day.

Once he started a special school, I warned them about his behavior. He would probably scream, tantrum, might even get violent. They said don't worry. He did scream for about a week. It got less each day. The teacher kept reassuring him but was firm he was not going home (that's what he was used to-he screams and gets to go home). He even wore his backpack for 3 straight days (refused to take it off in school bc he wanted to go home). They let him wear it and they just kept distracting him. I told them books he loved, he liked to do puzzles, etc. so once they knew things he liked they would try to engage him as long as possible (of course until he remember he wasn't crying and then started again!).

I'd say it took about a full month for him to completely adjust. He now loves school. He needs the structure. When he is off, he is a mess.

Hang in there! They are trained to deal with this.

ETA: My son even threw a chair his first week at the new school. Thank god he didn't hurt anyone. I wanted to die when they told me. The teacher said she just wanted me to know and they are working with him on using his words to express his emotions. She said she has had many chair throwers and he's not the first and won't be the last and they will break him of it. Happy to say that was in January and haven't had an outburst like that since thank goodness.

Message edited 8/13/2015 9:26:44 PM.