Moving in with parents

I am curious to see what others think about this.

DH and I just got married. We are in a really nice apartment right now, and just found out that the rent is going up. We were not raised for 2 years, so now it's going to go up over $150. I am not working, just going to school FT. DH has been paying for everything and we make it by, but are not saving anything. I was talking to my parents about it, and then before you know it they had contractors at their house last night. They want to put an extention on their house so we can live there rent free. We would save SO much money, until we can afford to buy a home. I am only in school for 1 more year, so it should only be for another year and half or so.

My parents are like another couple to us to hangout with. We go out with them on the weekends, talk everyday, and generally love spending time with them. They are "yonger" parents, not noisy and I really feel like it woudn't be a problem living in their house. The only issue is that we would have to share a kitchen. DH and I don't see this as a problem. Some of my friends have said things and i'm just curious what you all think.

tell me what you think

Re: Moving in with parents

i have only been married 17 days but we are living rent free in my parents' attic and so far we love it

they give us so much privacy and yet its nice to have them so close

we never lived on our own though so i dont know if THAT would be a hard transition . . .

the way i see it - its worth the sacrifice! and as my friend said to me - i get to have TWO "newlywed" periods. . . another one when we are out on our own!

Re: Moving in with parents

I say, sometimes if the opportunity is there, especially if will allow you a big jump financially towards a house, i say the sacrafice is worth it. As long as you guys still have a private space and private time to yourselves.

I say do it, but make sure there are ground rules regarding privacy and alone time.

GL

Edited for spelling

Message edited 1/30/2008 11:50:01 AM.

Re: Moving in with parents

I say if you have a great relationship with your parents.....go for it!

Re: Moving in with parents

Seeing that you don't have children yet I'd say go for it!!! The reason I say this is that it might be more stifling to be in the same home as your parents with a child underfoot...my friends are going through that right now.

I think it's an excellent opp. to save $$ up for a home, you all get along great, and you are at a point in your life when you can take off for a long weekend, go on vacation, go out to dinners etc. Do it!! What amazing parents to offer such a thing!

Re: Moving in with parents

Re: Moving in with parents

See I have a great relationship with my mom and my MIL but in NO way would I ever move in with either of them. Thats just me, I think we would kill each other or DH and I would kill each other. Hey but it could work, GL.

Re: Moving in with parents

DH and I lived in my parents basement apartment (sorta) for 1 year rent free. I'm extremely greatful they did this for us. It def. helped us in the long run, and the fact that we could save (actually pay off debt instead) was wonderful. Now, they are probably going to do the same for my sister and her FI once they tie the knot.

Re: Moving in with parents

if they are spending the money on the extension, why not just help you financially?

Re: Moving in with parents

When we got married, we lived with MIL/FIL bc fil was very sick. We lived there for about a year to save money. We paid very minimal rent-mainly to help mil pay bills after fil passed away. After almost a year, we moved in with my parents. We don't get along with my sil who lives with my mil. I had it with her and refused to live there. DH hates her 1000x more than I do, so we agreed we had to leave- and my parents offered so we took-we too shared a kitchen.

Now, we can't do it anymore. While its nice, and helped us more than they will ever know, it's annoying. We have been married over 2 years and never on our own. We are looking for an apt/house to rent. But anyway....

Jump on the opportunity if they are willing to help. But make sure you guys are still happy because it isn't easy.

Good luck! Hope everything works out

Re: Moving in with parents

Re: Moving in with parents

Re: Moving in with parents

Posted by MrsGraz

Posted by maybebaby

Seeing that you don't have children yet I'd say go for it!!! The reason I say this is that it might be more stifling to be in the same home as your parents with a child underfoot...my friends are going through that right now.

I think it's an excellent opp. to save $$ up for a home, you all get along great, and you are at a point in your life when you can take off for a long weekend, go on vacation, go out to dinners etc. Do it!! What amazing parents to offer such a thing!

I KNOW!
I couldn't believe it, but they just want to help us...they struggled when they were younger and know how it feels.
They are so generous....they are the nicest people I know...i'm so luck to have them!

Re: Moving in with parents

Message edited 1/30/2008 12:03:00 PM.

Re: Moving in with parents

Posted by Tilde

Posted by MrsGraz

Posted by maybebaby

Seeing that you don't have children yet I'd say go for it!!! The reason I say this is that it might be more stifling to be in the same home as your parents with a child underfoot...my friends are going through that right now.

I think it's an excellent opp. to save $$ up for a home, you all get along great, and you are at a point in your life when you can take off for a long weekend, go on vacation, go out to dinners etc. Do it!! What amazing parents to offer such a thing!

I KNOW!
I couldn't believe it, but they just want to help us...they struggled when they were younger and know how it feels.
They are so generous....they are the nicest people I know...i'm so luck to have them!

we are SO lucky to have parents like ours!

my mom is the best - i mentioned to her that i had wanted to make pancakes but didnt have mix - the next day at the bottom of the stairs she had pancake mix that she bought for me. . . now i have to be careful what i say or she will end up doing all of my grocery shopping!

Re: Moving in with parents

DH and I lived with my parents for a few months after we were married. Our lease on our aprtment had just ended and our home was not yet ready (the one and only bathroom was under construction).

It worked out really well for us we were able to save a lot of money. We also never had any issues because we both work full time and have full schedules so we were hardly ever in the house. I secretly wish we could move back in my mom made me breakfast in the morning and dinner was always ready when I came home from work it was like having a personal chef that i didn't have to pay.

Re: Moving in with parents

We lived with my parents for about 9 months. We didn't have a separate area, we were living in my old bedroom, so it was hard to get privacy. However it really wasn't bad. Towards the end we really wanted our own place and the privacy. But we saved a lot of money in the short time we were there, so it was definitely worth it.
If you have a great relationship with your parents and your DH does too, and is ok with it, then I say go for it!

Re: Moving in with parents

Posted by Tilde

Posted by MrsGraz

Posted by maybebaby

Seeing that you don't have children yet I'd say go for it!!! The reason I say this is that it might be more stifling to be in the same home as your parents with a child underfoot...my friends are going through that right now.

I think it's an excellent opp. to save $$ up for a home, you all get along great, and you are at a point in your life when you can take off for a long weekend, go on vacation, go out to dinners etc. Do it!! What amazing parents to offer such a thing!

I KNOW!
I couldn't believe it, but they just want to help us...they struggled when they were younger and know how it feels.
They are so generous....they are the nicest people I know...i'm so luck to have them!

we are SO lucky to have parents like ours!

my mom is the best - i mentioned to her that i had wanted to make pancakes but didnt have mix - the next day at the bottom of the stairs she had pancake mix that she bought for me. . . now i have to be careful what i say or she will end up doing all of my grocery shopping!

Re: Moving in with parents

Re: Moving in with parents

I wouldn't do it, but I really appreciate our privacy. DH walks around in his boxers, goes to the kitchen for a late-night snack...It would be a completely different lifestyle if we had to change our lives because of running into parents. If it was a separate apt. with no shared living space, I would consider it, but I personally would never share living space.

Can you get a job at night or on weekends to help save? I've been going to school F/T and working F/T the past 4 years. It's been hard, but it's what I needed to do to save for a house. You should at least be able to cover the increase in rent.

Message edited 1/30/2008 1:08:54 PM.

Re: Moving in with parents

Re: Moving in with parents

After we were married we lived on our own, and then bought our house but it needed MAJOR work and I was 9 months preggo. We moved in with my parents (rent free) for 8 months while the hosue was being worked on. We saved money, I had my mom to help with the new baby and it really wasnt as bad as I thought it would be regarding privacy and space. I say take them up on it while you can!

Re: Moving in with parents

I think if you guys get along with them, and you know how to put them in their place if they do cross the line in your relationship, then by all means go for it. It will be a great way to save.

I could never do it, b/c I really need a LOT of privacy and space. But my brother and SIL did it. It became a bit tense for SIL b/c it was my parents, not hers, but in the end they bought a house with that saved $.

Message edited 1/30/2008 1:17:15 PM.

Re: Moving in with parents

Sounds like you and your DH have a good relationship with your Parents. and if your Dh doesn't seem to have any concerns about the living situation. I would go for it!

Good Luck!

Re: Moving in with parents

I have a wonderful relationship with my parents but I could never imagine going from my own place to living back home with my husband. To me, no matter how much privacy they give you, it is still not enough! I like to have the freedom to do whatever I want in my own place with no one interferring. Sharing a kitchen too would not go over well with us. I would not want to have to eat when they do or what they make or have the confusion when it comes time for me to cook.