Need some advice about my mother.....

I am really upset and hurt....We buried my father 7 years ago today. My mother has never been the same. She has battled with depression almost her entire life. She won't take medication because she beleives that it is addictive.

That being said, I went away with dh and the babies from Saturday-Sunday. On the way home I called her and asked her if she needed anything. She flipped out on the phone. She said some not so nice things to me about being selfish and forgetting the meaning of this weekend. Then she hung up on me. I was left speechless. I didn't call her back. I was really hurt.

I know that she is sad, and she has every right to be. But OMG, when does it stop? When does life move on and the hurt lessens? When do I stop walking on egg shells around her? I am 34 years old, married, with children and yet, I feel like such a child some times.

We want to move away but I know that will devestate her. So, that being said, I just don't know what to do.....

Re: Need some advice about my mother.....

Sounds like you are stuck between a rock and a hard place! Either way you lose!

First, I am so sorry about your father. It can't have been an easy weekend for you.

As you said, your mother is still mourning and while you understand that you are not in the same place that she is in the mourning process. Can you talk to her about the possibility of moving? Would she want to move to be close to you? Would moving be the change in life that she needs? Would there be a time to talk to her that things wouldn't be so raw?

I really want to say that you need to do what is best for your family. And in the end this is true. I just think you should approach the topic with her, even if it's scary to talk to her about it.