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Bridex100
Two Under Two Mommy
Member since 3/08 10420 total posts
Name:
Momx100
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Our baby wants to be held all the time. Are we just spoiling him?
Our baby barely cries but he is somewhat high maintenance. He loves to be held and wants attention all the time. Since we have many people giving him this attention, he barely cries. We tend to his needs very quickly. If he is awake, he wants to be held.
I can't help but wonder if we are spoiling him.
Anyone else's baby want to be held all the time?
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Posted 4/18/09 10:20 PM  |
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maria430
LIF Adolescent
Member since 4/07 671 total posts
Name:
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Re: Our baby wants to be held all the time. Are we just spoiling him?
My mother always warned me not to hold the baby all day because then they will get used to it....
I notice when DS gets a lot of attention all day, he cries once it stops.
We try to hold him and play with him, but also get him to hang in his bouncy...
It's hard because we love to play with him!
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| Posted 4/18/09 10:23 PM |
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EmmaNick
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Member since 12/06 16001 total posts
Name:
*
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Re: Our baby wants to be held all the time. Are we just spoiling him?
I personally don't think you can spoil a baby!
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| Posted 4/18/09 10:23 PM |
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Goldi0218
My miracles!
Member since 12/05 23902 total posts
Name:
Leslie
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Re: Our baby wants to be held all the time. Are we just spoiling him?
Posted by EmmaNick
I personally don't think you can spoil a baby!
I am going to agree.
The one thing I won't do, however, is allow her to sleep in my arms when we are home. Her crib is her crib. Bad habits start early and I don't do the family bed/bedroom thing. Other than that, I pick her up when I want.
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| Posted 4/18/09 10:28 PM |
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JDsWife
LIF Infant
Member since 4/08 343 total posts
Name:
Nicole
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Re: Our baby wants to be held all the time. Are we just spoiling him?
I really don't think you can "spoil" a newborn!
However, my newborn does sleep a lot better in peoples arms than the bassinet! We've been transitioning her from arms to bassinet...she's been getting more used to it! Good luck!
~Nicole
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| Posted 4/18/09 10:29 PM |
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leighla
Support Cancer Research
Member since 5/05 16353 total posts
Name:
Lauren
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Re: Our baby wants to be held all the time. Are we just spoiling him?
Posted by Goldi0218
Posted by EmmaNick
I personally don't think you can spoil a baby!
I am going to agree.
The one thing I won't do, however, is allow her to sleep in my arms when we are home. Her crib is her crib. Bad habits start early and I don't do the family bed/bedroom thing. Other than that, I pick her up when I want.
That's how I handled it too.
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| Posted 4/18/09 10:36 PM |
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Mimi25
LIF Adolescent
Member since 7/08 556 total posts
Name:
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Re: Our baby wants to be held all the time. Are we just spoiling him?
I don't think you can spoil a newborn. I hear this ALL the time from my mother and it drives me CRAZY!!! How can you spoil someone that is a few days/weeks old??? UGH!!! Hold your baby as much as you want!! Cherish this time..that's what I say
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| Posted 4/18/09 10:56 PM |
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Bridex100
Two Under Two Mommy
Member since 3/08 10420 total posts
Name:
Momx100
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Re: Our baby wants to be held all the time. Are we just spoiling him?
Posted by leighla
Posted by Goldi0218
Posted by EmmaNick
I personally don't think you can spoil a baby!
I am going to agree.
The one thing I won't do, however, is allow her to sleep in my arms when we are home. Her crib is her crib. Bad habits start early and I don't do the family bed/bedroom thing. Other than that, I pick her up when I want.
That's how I handled it too.
I often put him down on the bed with me when DH is at work. I love laying down and just watching DS sleep. I hope I am not creating bad habits. Currently his crib is only about 6 ft away from our bed but it feels so far away! I never hold him while he is sleeping though. As soon as he falls asleep, I put him down in his crib or on our bed.
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| Posted 4/18/09 10:58 PM |
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Porrruss
Nya nya nya
Member since 5/05 11618 total posts
Name:
Amy
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Re: Our baby wants to be held all the time. Are we just spoiling him?
At his age- the more he feels comfort from you the better. *Bad habits* aren't formed for a few more months- so enjoy holding and cuddling him.
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| Posted 4/18/09 11:02 PM |
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Reese1106
Family of 4! :o)
Member since 8/06 6655 total posts
Name:
Theresa
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Re: Our baby wants to be held all the time. Are we just spoiling him?
I agree that you cannot hold a baby too much when they are an infant. Holding them helps them get to know who you are and helps establish trust.
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| Posted 4/18/09 11:04 PM |
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Bridex100
Two Under Two Mommy
Member since 3/08 10420 total posts
Name:
Momx100
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Re: Our baby wants to be held all the time. Are we just spoiling him?
Posted by Mimi25
I don't think you can spoil a newborn. I hear this ALL the time from my mother and it drives me CRAZY!!! How can you spoil someone that is a few days/weeks old??? UGH!!! Hold your baby as much as you want!! Cherish this time..that's what I say
I hear you! My mom says that it is GOOD to let a baby cry sometimes. It makes me very nervous to let my own mother watch DS once I go back to work! 
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| Posted 4/18/09 11:05 PM |
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Goldi0218
My miracles!
Member since 12/05 23902 total posts
Name:
Leslie
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Re: Our baby wants to be held all the time. Are we just spoiling him?
Posted by Bridex100
Posted by leighla
Posted by Goldi0218
Posted by EmmaNick
I personally don't think you can spoil a baby!
I am going to agree.
The one thing I won't do, however, is allow her to sleep in my arms when we are home. Her crib is her crib. Bad habits start early and I don't do the family bed/bedroom thing. Other than that, I pick her up when I want.
That's how I handled it too.
I often put him down on the bed with me when DH is at work. I love laying down and just watching DS sleep. I hope I am not creating bad habits. Currently his crib is only about 6 ft away from our bed but it feels so far away! I never hold him while he is sleeping though. As soon as he falls asleep, I put him down in his crib or on our bed.
I wouldn't say that you are starting bad habits. I just know a handful of people whose children had a hard time transitioning into their own rooms/cribs. I knew from the get go that Abby would be in her crib as soon as we had it delivered - our nursery was not in place when she was born due to religion-based superstitions. All I know is that we have a child that goes down without crying and sleeps through the night - then again it can be pure luck too.
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| Posted 4/18/09 11:09 PM |
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MrsS2005
Mom of 3
Member since 11/05 13118 total posts
Name:
B
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Re: Our baby wants to be held all the time. Are we just spoiling him?
You cannot spoil a newborn. I also wouldn't let a newborn just cry. Newborns don't cry just to cry. They cry b/c something is wrong. By responding to the cries, you're tending to their needs and establishing trust. Don't worry about what your mom says. You know your child best.
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| Posted 4/19/09 12:55 AM |
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DeniseMarie
<3
Member since 8/07 10682 total posts
Name:
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Re: Our baby wants to be held all the time. Are we just spoiling him?
Posted by EmmaNick
I personally don't think you can spoil a baby!
i agree. I held DD all the time when she was a newborn, even when she was napping, I couldnt put her down! Once she started sleeping in the crib though at 3 months I started to transition her getting used to that.
Now at 8 months I can def see that she is started to learn cause and effect. "If I cry, they will come and take me out of the crib" so we are doing CIO now and it works.
Newborns need to be comforted and want that warm body next to them so go for it, tend to your baby's needs!
Message edited 4/19/2009 7:13:44 AM.
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| Posted 4/19/09 7:12 AM |
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Octobermom
LIF Adult
Member since 1/09 972 total posts
Name:
Anna Maria
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Re: Our baby wants to be held all the time. Are we just spoiling him?
All the parenting books say you can't spoil a newborn --- so enjoy holding him and playing with him. They are like this for so short a time period!
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| Posted 4/19/09 7:31 AM |
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wowcoulditbe
wow, pic is already 1 yr old!!
Member since 1/06 6689 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: Our baby wants to be held all the time. Are we just spoiling him?
my ped told us not to worry when dd did this - he pointed out, wouldn't you want to be held and feel secure?  dd is still a snuggler at 2 1/2 and I owuldn't trade it for the world...they are only little once and you should enjoy the time holding them...they get big so quick!
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| Posted 4/19/09 9:04 AM |
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karjules
Love my Jules :)
Member since 1/07 2056 total posts
Name:
Karen
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Re: Our baby wants to be held all the time. Are we just spoiling him?
Posted by Goldi0218
Posted by EmmaNick
I personally don't think you can spoil a baby!
I am going to agree.
The one thing I won't do, however, is allow her to sleep in my arms when we are home. Her crib is her crib. Bad habits start early and I don't do the family bed/bedroom thing. Other than that, I pick her up when I want.
ITA! we have done the same with DD. At around 5 weeks or so I stopped holding her for naps and had her used to her crib.
During the day I tried to get her used to bouncy seat/swing too so I could get some things done, but we definitely cuddled a lot too!
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| Posted 4/19/09 10:14 AM |
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LIMOMx2
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Member since 5/05 24989 total posts
Name:
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Re: Our baby wants to be held all the time. Are we just spoiling him?
I feel the opposite of everyone. I feel like you can spoil a baby and that habits can be formed at a very young age.
I won't rock her to sleep and didn't with Andrew because I don't that to be the only way they will go down, etc.
If she fusses I let her fuss. Only if it turns to crying then I know that something is going on and I will pick her up to soothe her.
I let her hang out by herself a lot and interact with her while she is in her bouncer, etc.
Message edited 4/19/2009 11:02:47 AM.
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| Posted 4/19/09 11:01 AM |
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lkrpaul
Becoming a Big Brother!
Member since 5/07 2541 total posts
Name:
Laura
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Re: Our baby wants to be held all the time. Are we just spoiling him?
I've read many places and been told by my pediatrician that you can't spoil a newborn.
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| Posted 4/19/09 11:10 AM |
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jprimrose
I love my little munchkins!
Member since 10/05 3939 total posts
Name:
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Re: Our baby wants to be held all the time. Are we just spoiling him?
Posted by Reese1106
I agree that you cannot hold a baby too much when they are an infant. Holding them helps them get to know who you are and helps establish trust.
ITA I believe if you attend to their needs quickly when they are first born they tend to cry less and less. My DD is almost 6 months and she does not cry when she wakes up anymore and my DS was the same way. I really believe this is because when they were first born I never let them cry for a long time before I gave them a bottle.
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| Posted 4/19/09 11:49 AM |
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lovemy2boys
LIF Adult
Member since 10/07 3915 total posts
Name:
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Re: Our baby wants to be held all the time. Are we just spoiling him?
I never thought you can spoil a newborn. My DS has been held since day one in the hospital. he is now 7 months and we can not put him down. We can't get anything done, he won't nap on his own and we have to put him to sleep each and every night. he is very spoiled and it happened somewhere along the line, I'm just not sure when  my inlaws watch him while I work FT and hold him all day, sometimes they put him down for naps. he is really bad, I of course don't have any advice for you bc I have a major problem on my hands now 
the only thing I will say is make sure your LO can nap and sleep on his/her own.
ETS we never let him fuss or cry either. but now if we don't tend to him Immediately , he has a FIT!!!!
Message edited 4/19/2009 6:32:14 PM.
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| Posted 4/19/09 6:30 PM |
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Jen2999
Baby girls & beagles rock!
Member since 8/06 10356 total posts
Name:
Jen
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Re: Our baby wants to be held all the time. Are we just spoiling him?
I dont think you can spoil a newborn. HOWEVER,DD is almost 3 months old and I definitely let her fuss for a little bit before I go get her. She has VERY distinct cries and sometimes she is just likes to be fussy for no reason. We put her in her crib awake and she is able to fall asleep on her own.
Maybe sometimes sit next to the baby and talk to him while he is awake instead of holding him if you are worried.
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| Posted 4/19/09 8:50 PM |
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headoverheels
s'il vous plaît
Member since 6/07 42079 total posts
Name:
LB
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Re: Our baby wants to be held all the time. Are we just spoiling him?
Posted by Bridex100
Posted by leighla
Posted by Goldi0218
Posted by EmmaNick
I personally don't think you can spoil a baby!
I am going to agree.
The one thing I won't do, however, is allow her to sleep in my arms when we are home. Her crib is her crib. Bad habits start early and I don't do the family bed/bedroom thing. Other than that, I pick her up when I want.
That's how I handled it too.
I often put him down on the bed with me when DH is at work. I love laying down and just watching DS sleep. I hope I am not creating bad habits. Currently his crib is only about 6 ft away from our bed but it feels so far away! I never hold him while he is sleeping though. As soon as he falls asleep, I put him down in his crib or on our bed.
i think that is just fine - when DS was a newborn i LOVED watching him sleep. i still love it now 
you are not spoiling him by holding him all the time. i never wanted to put DS down when he was little, and there was always someone around wanting to hold him. he was never a fussy baby.
now he is 7.5 months old and can play very well by himself and is not high maintenance at all.
i say, hold him all you want!
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| Posted 4/19/09 8:57 PM |
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sunflowerjesss
Mommy to 3!
Member since 10/05 20369 total posts
Name:
Jesss, duh.
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Re: Our baby wants to be held all the time. Are we just spoiling him?
Ryan has always been a baby who wants to be the center of attention. Never like the swing, bouncer, boppy, etc as a newborn. Always liked to be held and cuddled.
Honestly, I don't think he is now "spoiled". As my MIL would say, "Ryan knows what he wants and wants what he knows."
I do not believe you can spoil a baby. Every baby is different and requires different attention.
Do what you need to do to get through the day
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| Posted 4/19/09 9:04 PM |
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MsMBV
:P
Member since 5/05 28602 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: Our baby wants to be held all the time. Are we just spoiling him?
I forgot which book it was, but there is a theory about 4th trimester, in which the NB is getting used to being out of the womb. During this time, according to what I read, the baby needs to feel safe and secure as it did in the womb.
So no, I do not think you are spoiling your baby, and I agree with the PPs - it is not possible to spoil them at such a young age.
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| Posted 4/20/09 9:50 AM |
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