Pity post... (BF/FT working mom, sick, dogs and DS are sick...) - UPDATE from the dr. visit... I have to give up BF!

So, I have been sick with a cold for the past 3 weeks. I am STILL sick. I can't go anywhere without my box of tissue. Now DS has a cold too.

Meanwhile, I still have my toe issue since the Summer. I am not healing. I took antibiotics twice in the past 4 weeks. I have to go back AGAING to the specialist today.

I am working FT. BF/pumping all day.

DS is still waking up once at night (although an improvement from twice!!).

I am completelly exhausted. My mind is never resting. I am always thinking about what has to be done next, when is my next pumping, prepare DS for next day. My time is that rushed 2 minute shower in the morning. Taking care of 2 dogs (who had to be shaved 1 week ago because they were all matted... I have no extra time for them and I feel bad. Meanwhile, the groomer razor burned them. One of them could not even sit... Yes, I am pizzed!!!! He has been crying days and nights to be held in our arms. DH is helping with the dogs).

I may have to be on more serious antibiotics to help me get rid of this infection in my toe.

I felt so guilty about having to give up BF because I did it for 4.5 months and want DS to have the best nutrition. BUT now... I am totally thinking of giving up. I feel I don't care, I am so exhausted.

And DH is helping me. But he works in the City so there is not much time in the evening.

Oh yes, my house is a mess. I can't even have a cleaning lady because every surface of my house is covered with stuff.

That in addition to starting my own business.

I don't even know why I "complain".
I can't really feel sorry for myself. It's not an option to crash. DH, DS and my dogs need me.

OK vent over....

UPDATE

I went to the specialist for my toe this afternoon. I have a staph infection. So now, I HAVE to stop BFing for 1 week anyway. I cannot BF with that new antibiotic I have to take. I called the Ped to call me back to make sure I did not pass the infection to DS. I am freaking out. I was so upset when I left the dr. I came back to work with red eyes.... but I don't care. I am too upset!! Thanks for the support Ladies!

Message edited 11/12/2007 3:42:43 PM.

Re: Pity post... (BF/FT working mom, sick, dogs and DS are sick...)

I hope you feel better soon and everything else gets better for you too. I don't know how you do it all - especially the BFing while working (pumping, etc.) You are not a bad mom at ALL if you give that up. You gave DS a great start!

Message edited 11/12/2007 11:50:34 AM.

Re: Pity post... (BF/FT working mom, sick, dogs and DS are sick...)

Vent away- we're all here to listen.

I know how hard it is to even think about stopping BFing. For 4.5 months- you have provided him with the best of the best nutrients. Many, MANY women don't go that far. It's ok to FF. BUT- will weaning to FF cause MORE stress to you?

DON'T worry about having a clean house- that can always be done *later*. You need to concentrate on you. I totally understand where you are coming from- I hate the rushing and constant need to plan.

You're doing a GREAT job- remember that!! I hope you feel better REALLY soon.....

Re: Pity post... (BF/FT working mom, sick, dogs and DS are sick...)

Re: Pity post... (BF/FT working mom, sick, dogs and DS are sick...)

I'm sorry you're having such a sucky time. I've been there too (only with foot surgery & 2 ferrets - which are easier because they're smaller).

Screw cleaning the house. I know it's disturbing not to have a clean house but ds isn't walking around yet, so cut yourself some slack while you can.

If you need to start supplementing, do it. You can always pump to your heart's content later to boost your supply.

Above all, take care of you. You're the cog that keeps things going.

Re: Pity post... (BF/FT working mom, sick, dogs and DS are sick...)

I understand how you feel.

It is so hard to work and be a mommy.

There is NO time to rest, sit down or anything. Coming to work is my break.

I remember the days of pumping- it was awful.

You should be so proud of yourself for BFing this long! Whatever you decide to do- you are a terrific mommy.

Try and get some rest if you can- you need to heal- forget the house, forget the dogs (give them some treats- they will survive without too much attention for a week or two) and take care of YOU!

Re: Pity post... (BF/FT working mom, sick, dogs and DS are sick...)

I give you a TON of credit. You've managed to juggle all these things, it's no wonder you aren't healing and getting rid of your cold. You have to take care of yourself or you won't be any good to anyone. If stopping BFing will lighten your load, there is nothing wrong with FF now. You gave your son a wonderful gift!

Re: Pity post... (BF/FT working mom, sick, dogs and DS are sick...)

All I can say is that you're amazing...once this all passes you'll be even stronger...

Re: Pity post... (BF/FT working mom, sick, dogs and DS are sick...)

Re: Pity post... (BF/FT working mom, sick, dogs and DS are sick...)

Re: Pity post... (BF/FT working mom, sick, dogs and DS are sick...)

I feel the stress a lot of times too. I rarely think about myself or even have a moment when my brain stops going, even if my body isn't.

Do you have anyone who can come over and help out ---- either to give you some time to go out and vegitate by yourself, or to help you with the dogs, baby, cleaning?

I know when my younger sister is home from college I can ask her from help.

I think it's so easy for us to forget about ourselves when we are mommys, but we really need some time "off" just for us too.

Re: Pity post... (BF/FT working mom, sick, dogs and DS are sick...)

I know how you feel girl. I am in the same boat as you. I feel like i have no time. And most of that is due to the fact that i live in Pennsylvania. DH and I own our own business and work Full time. I was just saying yesterday that I feel like my life never slows down and now with a baby its 10x worse. I get up at 5 am in the morning and dont get to bed until 1am at night. I get to sleep on the bus and on the way home while DH drives. I feel like DS is never going to have a solid schedule b/c we travel so darn much. And to top it off my DS is not in daycare.

My husband drives all the way from PA to drop DS off at my moms house in Queens then DH drives back to work in Manhattan. Int the evenings i pick up DS from Queens drive back to Manhattan to pick up DH then we drive to PA. its a complete mess if you ask me. All this b/c we dont want to put DS in daycare anymore.

I have to chalk it up to say All this is just one big sacrifice for my son. I am also working on starting up my business and feel that I have no time b/c of all the traveling.

I am really sick and tired of it. But I just have to take it day by day.


You are a great mom for BF'ing that long. I feel like giving it up too. I am so annoyed with pumping. But I will do it forthe benefit of my child for however long I can.

You need to take some "me" time. Go write in a journal, starbucks, read a book, go hang out with friends. This is how i keep my sanity.

Message edited 11/12/2007 2:52:41 PM.

Re: Pity post... (BF/FT working mom, sick, dogs and DS are sick...)

Don't worry, hang in there, it will get better! (it really can't get much worse)

Giving up BF is a personal decision. I was really fed up until I decided stopping the late night pumping. When I finally got 7 hours sleep BFing didn't seem bad all of a sudden...DS also started sleeping 10-12 hours a night around 5-6 months so it will get better eventually, hopefully in a couple weeks. The fact that your DC went from 1 to 2 wakings means it's probably coming to none soon!

Message edited 11/12/2007 2:56:54 PM.

Re: Pity post... (BF/FT working mom, sick, dogs and DS are sick...) - UPDATE!

Thanks for the support Ladies! Update on top.

Re: Pity post... (BF/FT working mom, sick, dogs and DS are sick...) - UPDATE from the dr. visit... I have to give up BF!

Can you pump & dump for a week until you are off of the antibiotics?

Re: Pity post... (BF/FT working mom, sick, dogs and DS are sick...) - UPDATE from the dr. visit... I have to give up BF!

I hope you all feel better

Re: Pity post... (BF/FT working mom, sick, dogs and DS are sick...) - UPDATE from the dr. visit... I have to give up BF!

Re: Pity post... (BF/FT working mom, sick, dogs and DS are sick...) - UPDATE from the dr. visit... I have to give up BF!

Re: Pity post... (BF/FT working mom, sick, dogs and DS are sick...) - UPDATE from the dr. visit... I have to give up BF!

I'm sorry Sophie!!! I hope this all blows over and you feel better soon!!!!

Re: Pity post... (BF/FT working mom, sick, dogs and DS are sick...) - UPDATE from the dr. visit... I have to give up BF!

Re: Pity post... (BF/FT working mom, sick, dogs and DS are sick...) - UPDATE from the dr. visit... I have to give up BF!

Re: Pity post... (BF/FT working mom, sick, dogs and DS are sick...) - UPDATE from the dr. visit... I have to give up BF!

Ive been there esp this week, bryan was sick, then I got sick and had to work full time etc etc etc. Some reason things always seems to fall apart at once- this too shall pass...

Re: Pity post... (BF/FT working mom, sick, dogs and DS are sick...) - UPDATE from the dr. visit... I have to give up BF!

first of all,

i am so sorry that you are going through all this, and i hope it all starts to come together soon!!

no matter what you decide regarding the BFing - you've done a FANTASTIC job and should make the decision that makes you the most comfortable.

i replied to your other post - i would mix th BM with formula. as far as what formula to choose, could your DS have a cow's milk allergy that made him gassy? maybe you could use a soy based formula and see if things get better?

Re: Pity post... (BF/FT working mom, sick, dogs and DS are sick...) - UPDATE from the dr. visit... I have to give up BF!

Oh my goodness...I am SO SORRY you are having such a rough time I had to give up BF for a week when DS was just 2 weeks old and it really did a number on me emotionally so I can only imagine that months later you must be going through so much! But, 4.5 mos is AMAZING!!!!! You really should be sooooo proud of yourself that you have made it this far under such challening circumstances. And, now, you have to take care of yourself for your child so you are still being the greatest mommy ever Please, feel good about how great you are doing and try not to focus on having to stop...

Re: Pity post... (BF/FT working mom, sick, dogs and DS are sick...) - UPDATE from the dr. visit... I have to give up BF!

I am so sorry Sophie. I don't even know what to say. Did you fully decide to not even pump n dump? My heart goes out to you!

You need to take care of yourself first to make sure he has a mommy that's there for him.