Question for all you first time moms

Are you nervous about becoming a mommy or DH nervous about becoming a daddy for the fist time??
I am 22 weeks and it's really starting to hit that i will be a mommy in a few months. Im worried i will forget something or mess something up?

Are you worried too?? How do you handle it??
I know its a learned experience but in the beginning when DD will first come home im worried i won't show what to do.

Re: Question for all you first time moms

Sometimes I have slight moments of panic. I'm 25 weeks and starting to think about what sort of "methods" we want to use with the baby - ie strictly scheduled naps, feeding and bedtimes - or if we'd like to be more fluid about it all. I worry about how we'll manage financially. But I know that ultimately there's no way to plan for all of this, you just have to wait and see.

that said, I *think* we'll be okay. I did a lot of baby sitting when I was younger and I'm pretty good with children in general. My brother has three kids and DH's brother has two, so we are around kids a lot. We've been married for 5 years now and are as ready as we'll ever be! Plus, friends all around us have children and we often discuss what we like and dont' like about parenting skills that we witness, etc.

So, to answer your question - yes, it's a bit scary and naturally we worry, but in the end we couldn't be more ready, so we'll just have to deal with it! I think it's natural to feel that way.

Re: Question for all you first time moms

I'm not really worried at all. DH doesn't seem to be either.

Maybe it's because I have 7 nieces and nephews. Maybe it's because I was a part-time nanny in college. Maybe it's because I know how supportive and hands-on my DH will be.

I just feel like this parenting thing will come naturally to me.

I'm not saying that it will be easy, or that I wont be stressed and second guess myself a dozen times a day, but I'm not worried.

I know it's not going to be a walk in the park, but I feel like I know enough on my own, and that I have a lot of support from my family and they will guide me when I need help.


(Ask me this again in September when I'm sleep deprived and trying to feed a screaming newborn! )

Re: Question for all you first time moms

Sometimes I find myself up at night wondering about this. It is so scary at times. I have been worrying about it, but everytime I feel a kick reminds me of how much I love him and I know we will be ok.

Re: Question for all you first time moms

I also get waves of panic when I think about it. I am excited but naturally I feel a little overwhelmed to think about the what ifs...I start thinking about how our lives are going to completely change, will I be a good mother, how to deal with the change...I think DH thinks the same but he is more laid back than myself and says it's just going to come to us naturally.

Re: Question for all you first time moms

Well, I dont know i have mixed Feelings .. sometimes i Think I wont know what to do because Im soo Dependent on Everyone else like my Parents and DH but on another hand I think I will 100% Fine and Ready to Handle what is to come .. I have that Motherly Instinct that will Kick in I already feel it ..

Re: Question for all you first time moms

We have oodles of nieces and nephews, but I do worry about being able to function and going back to work on so little sleep.

Re: Question for all you first time moms

im not really nervous, ive been taking care of babies and children for years b/c of my job. And i feel pretty comfortable taking car of an infant.

Message edited 4/9/2009 11:37:33 AM.

Re: Question for all you first time moms

I was nervous, DH was terrified!

Someone once told me “don’t worry, the baby wont know if you are doing it wrong”

Its true, you can be prepared, read books, take classes, be a nanny, etc…nothing will prepare you for being a parent to your own child. Every kid is different you may be strict on scheduled naps and then have a kid who doesn’t do well with routines. We tried napping on demand and DS would only nap for 30 minutes. When we switched to a more set schedule he did 90 minutes at a time. Its all trial and error. And the baby will guide you along the way.

Try not to worry, It’s a crazy ride…one that will bring you to tears at times and make you laugh at yourself but one day you will look back and just smile remembering when they were that small and how scared you were to be responsible for this life. Its like the Darius Ruker song “it wont be like this for long”

Re: Question for all you first time moms

I worry that the baby will be not be healthy. Outside of that, nothing really scares me except for one thing.

I feel like I have great support system in place, and I just know in my heart what a fantastic father my DH will be. I see him with my neices and nephews and they LOVE him , he is so good with all kids.

I am more worried about having to go back to work and leaving my baby with a nanny. THAT worries me, someone else caring for my child during the day, because no one will love and care for my baby the way mommy and daddy will . It is what it is, I have to go back, but that worries me the most.

Re: Question for all you first time moms

I am actually very calm about it. DH on the other hand, he is nervous. He even told me the other night, that it will not truly hit him until the baby is actually born & he sees him/her. Then reality will settle in & his focus will completely change.

I do feel that parenthood will come naturally to me especially since I have 3 nephews & was a "mommy's helper" when I was a teenager. Everyone tells me how much of a natural I am.

In terms of DH, I think that the newborn stage will be tough on him but once he gets into a routine of doing things daily, he will be ok. I think DH is very nervous about being a provider for not only him & I but now to a baby also. I have all the confidence in the world that he can do it though

Re: Question for all you first time moms

we are both very nervous.

excited, but apprehensive.

dh and i will celebrate our 15th year of being a couple this year...so after being together so long without a child, I think we are both understandably nervous about how it will effect us individually and as a couple. it will definitely throw our dynamic for a loop, and my dh especially has a large learning curve. he's never really had to care for anything, and has been well cared for all his life. it will be trying at times, I think. (I don't mean care for as in have feelings for...I mean physically providing care to another human being )

I am more nervous for my self than I am for my child. I have always vowed after coming from a less than ideal home life that I would work myself to the bone, and extend myself in all ways humanly possible to raise a happy and well-loved child. as far as caring for the child, I helped raise my youngest siblings. I fed them, woke up with them at night, changed their pampers, helped potty train...all of those things. My youngest sister was born when I was 17...I was a mom to her.

My mother in some ways, resented her children and her life. I never want to feel that way, and that is what scares me the most. b/c if you resent and child and it shows, they will know it. and I don't think any child should be made to feel that way.

Good luck to all of us...and may our children be blessed with the parents and life they deserve!

Message edited 4/9/2009 11:27:05 AM.

Re: Question for all you first time moms

DH's plan for fatherhood... bubble wrap and a baby leash.

My plan for motherhood... this is what I've been waiting for, go with my natural instincts with guidance from my mother, two sisters and sister in law (all within five miles).

And yes, I get the scary holy cr@p what am I doing thoughts often but they don't last long. It will be what it will be and we'll be fine and great parents!

Re: Question for all you first time moms

im nervous about the unexpected

Re: Question for all you first time moms

I feel like I am as ready as i'll ever be.

I have a few concerns, but they are not how DH and I will fare as parents. I think the two of us make a strong, solid unit and will make awesome parents as well.

I do worry sometimes about financial aspects of parenthood, but we will make it work and do what we have to do.

We have an excellent support system around us. My mom and sister, i'm SURE will be around to help. My mother in law lives seconds away, and my girlfriend and her hubby (VWebb35) recently moved in 4 doors down, and are having their first baby in June...so we can help eachother.

I am more excited to get started than anything else!

Re: Question for all you first time moms

totally scared...I worry enough about my nieces/nephew, I can't imagine about my own! I know I'll do my best to be a good mom, I know my instincts are good- I just worry about awful stuff happening.

Re: Question for all you first time moms

I'm nervous, but DH is fine, he says. We have a lot of nieces and nephews, but we always get to give them back at the end of the day!

I think I'm more concerned about the unknown, I'm worried about labor and delivery and I'm worried if the baby will be healthy. I just feel unprepared, despite how much I try to do.

Re: Question for all you first time moms

Honestly? I'm not really thinking about it!!

Re: Question for all you first time moms

Posted by Wendy

Honestly? I'm not really thinking about it!!

Re: Question for all you first time moms

im petrified..seriously...

theres so much to learn about feedings, formulas, baby foods, changing diapers, etc. i have no clue...really i dont.



i know we all get through it though.

Re: Question for all you first time moms

Posted by Peainapod

im petrified..seriously...

theres so much to learn about feedings, formulas, baby foods, changing diapers, etc. i have no clue...really i dont.



i know we all get through it though.

Re: Question for all you first time moms

I'm so excited and then at times I get nervous about it, but I think that's expected.

Especially since one of my BF's was the first one out of my group of friends to have a baby, this past October, and I've seen all the little things she deals w/ like him getting sick and having to suction the mucus out of his mouth so he could breath.

You can never know what's going to happen but I believe that's what brings joy to living life...the unexpected!

Re: Question for all you first time moms

I'm terrified. I'm so excited for this baby, but a huge part of me is just SO scared. I'm afraid I wont know what to do, or what he needs, or if I'm doing things the "right" way. I also wont have much help since DH will be leaving for a year only 3 weeks after our is born, and our family is in NY and I'm living in NC.

But, I try to remind myself constantly that if everyone else can do it, so can I. My grandmother was 19 when she had her first child and somehow she managed to not only be a parent, but be a wonderful one. I'm sure things will come naturally -- and anything that doesnt, will be trial and error. I do know that I love this little already...so I'll just take it from there and I'm sure it'll all work out.

Re: Question for all you first time moms

I think we all have moments of worry and apprehension. I'm more of a worrier by nature than my dh, he is so calm and laid back he has to remind me that we are ready for this.