Questions about registry... Im lost.

I have no experience with registries AT ALL. Unfortunately I did not have a bridal shower (LONGGGgg story) and so *IF* I have a baby shower this will be my first time registering.

Sorry if these questions are really dumb...

1. Do you put the furniture (crib, dresser) on the list? Or are the parents-to-be responsible for those big ticket items?

I ask because sadly my family's mentality is..."oh well if your gonna have a shower thats gonna cost you lots of $$ you might as well just skip the shower and buy the stuff you need yourselves. I keep telling them that its about the actual event, and experiencing a party just for the mom, etc. but they dont get it.

Any input would be great. Thanks

Re: Questions about registry... Im lost.

i'm sorry that your family doesn't get that the shower is a chance for everyone to celebrate the baby. i hope if you have one that you have a great time, without drama!

we didn't put furniture on ours, but some people do. as a btdt, clothing, blankets, bibs, washcloths, and towels are not needed on it either. people like to pick that stuff out and it can be so hard to find based on the way it is listed on the registry. you will end up needing things like forks, bowls, cups, etc. before you know it, so add them too.

Re: Questions about registry... Im lost.

Sorry about your family.
I did put the furniture on my registry but there was really no need to do it. My parents will be purchasing the furniture for us. I really just did it because we were in the store and I wanted to check it off my list of being picked out

If you need any help. I did a ton of research using the book baby bargains and typed a very detailed registry list that really helped when we went to register. If you would like me to send it to you, FM me your email address and I would be glad to help out!

Re: Questions about registry... Im lost.

Sent you the email and sent you an FM!

Re: Questions about registry... Im lost.

Re: Questions about registry... Im lost.

It's up to you if you want to put those items on. I've had friends who have put on the furniture. I will not be adding the furniture because my parents volunteered to buy us our furniture.

Re: Questions about registry... Im lost.

Re: Questions about registry... Im lost.

Posted by d-h2008

Posted by sasha96

i'm sorry that your family doesn't get that the shower is a chance for everyone to celebrate the baby. i hope if you have one that you have a great time, without drama!

we didn't put furniture on ours, but some people do. as a btdt, clothing, blankets, bibs, washcloths, and towels are not needed on it either. people like to pick that stuff out and it can be so hard to find based on the way it is listed on the registry. you will end up needing things like forks, bowls, cups, etc. before you know it, so add them too.

Thanks Its pretty disappointing because this is the same exact thing that happened when we talked about my bridal shower. My mom just kept saying how its gonna cost us thousands of dollars for a bridal shower, meanwhile she can go out and buy me "whatever I needed for the house" for the same or less cost as a shower. So my replacement of the shower was was my mom writing me a check and me going to BBB and Ikea and getting the bare necessities for the apt. SAAADDD!! I just feel like she wants NOTHING celebrated/she doesnt want to put effort into planning anything. At this point my husband is so pizzed he told me to plan it myself.

Now im sitting here trying to see what I need for th registry, adding all that $$ up and seeign is a baby shower would cost more or less... in my moms words "to see if the shower is worth it". LOVELY.

Re: Questions about registry... Im lost.

so sorry your family has this type of mentality. Register for furniture and everything your heart desires!!!! If you get it you get it and if you don't don't worry you'll get it for yourself!

Re: Questions about registry... Im lost.

My parents were the same way asking if I really wanted a shower, they rather spend the money & buy us everything too. We did not register for furniture. My parents are hosting the shower, and the IL's wanted to buy the furniture. However, many people register for the furniture. You can do whatever you feel comfortable with.

Re: Questions about registry... Im lost.

Bump for the night group

Re: Questions about registry... Im lost.

Sorry you are going through this. I would definately plan the shower yourself with DH if it is becoming an issue for your family. Who knows, maybe once you start planning they will realize that they are being silly and help you out anyway. DH and I didnt register for furniture b/c we knew we couldnt expect anyone to buy something that expensive for us. There are so many other things we will need that will all add up that we figured we would be responsible for the furniture. But, if you have a close family member who has mentioned or who you think might want to purchase these big ticket items then you could definately add it on.

Re: Questions about registry... Im lost.

I did put the furniture on the registry just for the sake of putting it on, the only reason I did was that so my friends and family could see what the furniture looked like when they accessed my registry

As for the shower, I'm sorry your mom doesn't seem to understand that the shower is not just a way to get gifts but a celebration for you and your LO. I agree with DH, plan it yourself and throw yourself a nice little party, you deserve it! Can some of your friends help plan something?

As for what you will need, I also used Baby Bargains as a reference guide, it's a great resource for those of us new mommies who are completely lost. Not only does it tell you exactly what you will *really* need, it offers in depth reviews that I found extremely helpful. I would definitely recommend picking up a copy.

Please let me know if you need any help, I would be glad to help out in any way

Re: Questions about registry... Im lost.

Posted by d-h2008

Posted by sasha96

i'm sorry that your family doesn't get that the shower is a chance for everyone to celebrate the baby. i hope if you have one that you have a great time, without drama!

we didn't put furniture on ours, but some people do. as a btdt, clothing, blankets, bibs, washcloths, and towels are not needed on it either. people like to pick that stuff out and it can be so hard to find based on the way it is listed on the registry. you will end up needing things like forks, bowls, cups, etc. before you know it, so add them too.

Thanks Its pretty disappointing because this is the same exact thing that happened when we talked about my bridal shower. My mom just kept saying how its gonna cost us thousands of dollars for a bridal shower, meanwhile she can go out and buy me "whatever I needed for the house" for the same or less cost as a shower. So my replacement of the shower was was my mom writing me a check and me going to BBB and Ikea and getting the bare necessities for the apt. SAAADDD!! I just feel like she wants NOTHING celebrated/she doesnt want to put effort into planning anything. At this point my husband is so pizzed he told me to plan it myself.

Now im sitting here trying to see what I need for th registry, adding all that $$ up and seeign is a baby shower would cost more or less... in my moms words "to see if the shower is worth it". LOVELY.

Re: Questions about registry... Im lost.

Hmmmmmmmm that's a tough thing. I can see your Mom's point, but the reality is the shower isn't just about the gifts. It's about sharing your happiness with your family and friends.

We did not do furniture since it was a gift from my grandparent's so we took pictures and placed them on the gift table so people could see it. You would be suprised on what people buy you. People also like to go in on gifts. My work friends all went in together and bought the bathtub and FILLED it with bath things. If you can think about all the things you may need/want to make bathtime fun it was in this tub It was an adorable gift and not a cheap one either. People will suprise you.

Re: Questions about registry... Im lost.

you dont need to spend thousands on a shower!
as far as the things i put on my registry was the things that I know i wanted and needed because I know if i do have a shower im just inviting my close friends. so for me putting a lot on the registry might have made me miss out on getting the things that i def needed.
I didnt put furniture because my parents already bought it.

Re: Questions about registry... Im lost.

I should also say you should def have a shower because you missed out on the bow ribbon hat!!!

Re: Questions about registry... Im lost.

we put a few pieces of furniture (crib, glider) on our registries...that way if anyone wanted to buy it as a group gift they had the option.

my mil ended up buying the crib. the glider is still on there and we purchased our own dresser/changing table.

with regards to the shower...it doesnt HAVE to cost thousands...could you talk to your mom about just having something at the house so family/close friends can just get together and celebrate?

if that idea doesnt work...could u talk with your friends/dh etc? you can get a few ppl to make a few dishes that way all the cooking isnt just left to one person. : )

Re: Questions about registry... Im lost.

Thank you ladies for the replies... I'm thinking I will put the furniture on there *just in case* my mom has a change of heart and decides to get it for me.

Plus, I could have sworn from previous posts that you ladies mentioned something about a discount on items that are not bought?? (thats good!)

And to the previous poster... YES! I dont have an entitled feeling or anything but DANG, I never got my ribbon hat LOl I want it this time!!