Re: Raising Kids Today.....

Posted by Tine73

Posted by headoverheels

my personal opinion is that there is nothing wrong with indulging your kids, or dressig them in brand name clothes, or feeding them McDonald's once in a while.

the problem becomes when the child is no longer grateful for all the things you do for them.

if my child ever demanded i do something for him or buy him something because other kids were enjoying the same privileges, that is when i would pull the plug. but i do not agree that there is taboo in buying brand name products just because we feel the "need." i don't feel the need to have anything brand name. if i see something that is cute, i buy it - whether it's from target or baby gap.

ITA. Everyone keeps mentioning brand names clothes like its a bad thing. If it is, then I am a horrible mother.

DD is 14 months old - I can hardly call her spoiled - her clothes are more for me than for her at this point

Everyday I think about how lucky I am and how grateful I am for everything I have and I hope to pass on that mentality to DD. My parents made me work for everything I got (good grades, etc...). I plan to do the same thing.

Re: Raising Kids Today.....

I think the amount the anyone chooses to spend on clothing is irrelevant. I do not believe that because one chooses to spend, for example $80 on a child's outfit that will necessarily make that child have a sense of entitlement. In that same way I do not think that only spending $15 makes a parent somehow better or that child's values any better instilled.

The fact of the matter is that we can instill values in our child but we must recognize that once they are in school these children are going to be influenced by their peers and the societal pressures. It is a well documented fact the children suffer great psychological impact in being ostracized by their peers. Does that mean that I will by my DD everything she wants - No - but if it is within my means I will buy her some of the stuff she wants. I do not think that this will automatically make her spoiled.

Re: Raising Kids Today.....

I agree that things have changed drastically since we were young. It scares me ALOT. I think it's very sad how some parents today let their tweens out of the house half dressed and with a nicer handbag than I have.

We are making an effort to maintain balance. She will have nice things when she is older but like Heather said, her Abercrombie top will be mixed with a "regular" pair of jeans, etc. I hope to always teach her the value of earning something rather than assuming it will be hers. I am sort of old fashioned but I think it's a good thing.

Message edited 1/6/2009 1:05:46 PM.

Re: Raising Kids Today.....

Re: Raising Kids Today.....

The issue is that Im so scared of not doing a good enough job that the societial pressures will take over,....that I want to move to Nebraska and home school.

Obviously I wont, but I do now understand why people home school.

I feel the social raspect of school is an important part of growing and learning so I wont. But I really want to instill old school values in my son and Im a bit shocked that many around me think I'm doing him harm.

Its about all of it...How badly I want my son to know he is special, but yet KNOW I can do harm if I push it too much, or how I want to protect him from all the pesticides, preservatives, additives in this world, but he and I get ridiculed for it..and or will.

How I dont want him to have a cellphone, at 12 but dont want him to feel left out. How I dont want him to be tempted by the way 10 yr old girls dress these days....and so on.

It just makes my head spin thinking about it.

I dont harp on it in my mind, just worry how he will end up if I go "against the grain" in terms of raising him...