LIFamilies.com - Long Island, NY


RSS
Articles Business Directory Blog Real Estate Community Forum Shop My Family Contests

Log In Chat Index Search Rules Lingo Create Account

Quick navigation:   

Eparty?

Forum Opinion Poll
Greedy and a hassle for people 88 51.76%
Normal and would love to be invited to one 82 48.24%
 

Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

Posted By Message
Pages: 1 [2] 3 4

MrsSchwags
Soccer Baseball Lax Mom

Member since 10/05

11240 total posts

Name:
Jennifer

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

I don't think it is greedy. It costs money to throw parties so its not like people are just giving you money.

If they dont want to go they don't have to!!!!

We had a great time at ours. I know our guests did too!

Celebrate its a joyous occasion!!! Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 8/14/06 8:37 PM
 

nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.

Member since 7/05

57538 total posts

Name:

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

Posted by Shellyesq

I had one and don't think its greedy... unless it is a few months before hte wedding. We had ours a year before our wedding, and most of the ones I have been to are about a year before the wedding, and I don't think they are greedy.

A friend got invited to an engagement party 4 weeks before the wedding. That I think is a little greedy.



I completely agree. It should be held well in advance of the wedding. I was annoyed when I was invited to an epart 8 weeks before the wedding - 2 weeks AFTER her shower, 4 weeks AFTER her surprise 30th birthday party.Chat Icon

I think the point of the engagement party is for the families to meet & to toast the couple. If it's done with that in mind, it's not greedy at all.

Posted 8/14/06 8:41 PM
 

Jessica
I'm a mommy :)

Member since 1/06

7322 total posts

Name:
~Jess~

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

very interesting

Posted 8/14/06 8:55 PM
 

lilacwine
only love...

Member since 5/05

2034 total posts

Name:
<3

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

Posted by Jax430

I don't think it's greedy, but when I got engaged, my mom basically said to me, "We'll throw you an engagement party or a shower. We're not asking people to give you gifts 3 times over." So, there are people who do have the view that it is greedy.

I think it's all about what's the norm in your family/group of friends. The truth is that even though we didn't have an engagement party, the people who wanted to give us gifts (most of the people who would have been invited to an e-party) did anyhow, and I think my mother was the only one who would have perceived the party as greedy.





Message edited 3/24/2012 6:29:52 PM.

Posted 8/14/06 9:00 PM
 

MegZee
My bunny

Member since 5/06

8777 total posts

Name:
Meaghan

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

Honestly, I don't like engagement parties.

If you have a backyard affair to have the families meet its one thing - but ive been to engagement parties that have DJ's, favors, a "first dance" mother/son dances, etc...its basically like a Mini wedding and I dont see the point!

But, in the end, I would do what you want. If you want to have an engagement party so the families can meet, i think its a great idea - just dont go too crazy, thats what the wedding is for!

Posted 8/14/06 9:02 PM
 

MrsPorkChop
Twinning!!

Member since 5/05

9941 total posts

Name:
Missy

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

my mom did not want me to have one for fear it looked like we were asking for gifts.

However, many people sent me an engagement gift anyway.

I am really opinionless about it. And since im the type of person that "sends a gift anyway" it would be nice to get some food out of it! LOL so I dont have any issues with these parties, but the older folk seem to..and since I care what people think, I did not have one.

Posted 8/14/06 9:10 PM
 

lvdolphins
My Loves!

Member since 5/05

46292 total posts

Name:

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

Im going to be honest. I agree with Jax. I don't think they are greedy but if you have a shower I think that is enough.
I am not against them. If your having an e-party I think having it maybe a year to maybe 8 months before the wedding is fine. Some families (like mine) have showers 3 months before.
Ive been to backyard engagement parties, then parties that could have been the couples wedding.

Posted 8/14/06 9:12 PM
 

bella
LIF Adult

Member since 5/05

1871 total posts

Name:

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

Absolutely not greedy, and really just because you have an eparty doesnt mean everyone will bring gifts. My DH and I are older and our parents wanted to throw us one so we at first thought it would look that way , especialy since we had a lot of "Things" to begin with but you know in the end it was so nice. Not everyone bought gifts and quite frankly we did not care in the least. It was an amazing party and full of family and close firends that were jsut their to show how happy they were we found each other. HOnestly, that day was more important to me than my shower. I say go for it and enjoy every minute!!

Posted 8/14/06 9:15 PM
 

Palebride
I am an amazing bakist

Member since 5/05

13673 total posts

Name:
Lori

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

We don't normally throw engagement parties in my family....but we used that time as an opportunity to throw a party to introduce the two families to one another.
It was called an "engagement party" but it was just a small party in my paren' 's backyard. We invited my husband's family, my family and members of the wedding party.
It was a lot of fun and not very much pressure for anyone.Chat Icon

Posted 8/14/06 9:15 PM
 

leese
Sarge!

Member since 5/05

1965 total posts

Name:
Leese

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

I was a little different in that we didn't live close to each other so it was an opportunity for extended family to meet each other. Now looking back, I am glad I did it because my family now knows it isn't INSANE to come visit me here in my new hometown.

I do not think it's greedy at all especially if it is far away from the wedding. I prefer if it's within a few months (but hey, who am i to judge?!) and often times it has been casual.

If you want one, you should have one and not worry what others think!

Posted 8/14/06 9:19 PM
 

Christine
2nd verse same as the 1st

Member since 5/05

15287 total posts

Name:

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

I think it partially depends on your social circle and partially on timing.

It's common or expected with some people and a gift grab to others.

For me, as long as the events are spaced properly, I think it's fine. I have mentioned before about one of my friends that had an e-party, shower, b-party and wedding within 7 months when her engagement was only 15 months long. E-parties should be closer to the date of engagement then the wedding.

Posted 8/14/06 9:20 PM
 

dpli
Daylight savings :)

Member since 5/05

13973 total posts

Name:
D

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

We had one mainly because:

1.) I didn't want a shower and my family wanted to do something. We didn't expect gifts, we just wanted to celebrate with people.

2.) It was a backyard party that was an opportunity for both families to meet before the wedding.

I think they can be nice, but I think they are more appropriate for a smaller group of people, like family and very close friends. I don't really think the guest list should include everyone that is invited to the wedding.

Posted 8/14/06 9:25 PM
 

-Laurie-
Hi!

Member since 5/05

2536 total posts

Name:

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

For a long engagement where both families haven't met or you live faraway and some members haven't met the bride or groom to be... yes I see no problem

For anything less then say 15 months and there are also showers then I think it is a bit greedy if it is a big party or within a year of the wedding.

Posted 8/14/06 9:27 PM
 

SweetTooth
I'm a tired mommy!

Member since 12/05

20105 total posts

Name:
Lauren

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

greedy? no, I don't think so.. we had one, it was a year before the wedding. If it was like 2-3 months before the wedding, I would say that would probably annoy people.

Posted 8/14/06 9:31 PM
 

MsG
Should be working

Member since 5/05

2824 total posts

Name:
G

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

Posted by npbride

I don't think they are greedy, maybe a little overkill if the shower and wedding are not too far off.

My BIL had an e-party, then less than a year later the bridal shower, then 6 weeks later the wedding. I thought that was a bit much.

Oh, did I mention that they put registry cards in the e-party invites? Chat Icon



Did we go to the same eparty? Chat Icon I remember seeing the registry cards and thinking "oh boy, this is going to be a looooong wedding season with these two"Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 8/14/06 9:33 PM
 

Shorty
.

Member since 5/05

30390 total posts

Name:
really

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

We had one------- 2 years before our wedding.

We were freshly engaged, and wanted our whole families to meet. (We had been together for more than 5 years at that point, but Aunts/Uncles/etc. had never met.)

When we announced our engagement, MY PARENTS actually asked when they could throw us a party. It was a backyard party with homemade food, and it was fabulous. The party was hardly a wedding fundraiser, and I'm slightly offended when some suggest it was.

Posted 8/14/06 9:43 PM
 

MrsPornStar
Partners in crime

Member since 10/05

14656 total posts

Name:
Mama

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

I don't think it's greedy. We were really on the fence about having one. Ultimately, we had a casual engagement party in our backyard with family and friends. Some brought gifts while others didn't. We didn't do it for the gifts. We did it because we wanted to celebrate our love and happiness.

Posted 8/14/06 10:04 PM
 

MrsRbk
<3 <3 <3 <3

Member since 1/06

19197 total posts

Name:
Michelle

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

I don't think it's greedy.

My FIL kept asking me if we were having one, but we had a fairly short engagement and didn't think it would be appropriate (for us).

Posted 8/14/06 10:32 PM
 

Diana1215
Living on a prayer!!!

Member since 10/05

29450 total posts

Name:
Diana

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

I don't think it's greedy. We had a meeting of the immediate families - which was about 70 people in itself.

This is what I think is weird - we just recently went to an engagement party where the couple invited EVERYONE they knew....even people who are NOT going to be invited to the wedding. THAT to me is very odd. Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 8/14/06 10:35 PM
 

nferrandi
too excited for words

Member since 10/05

18538 total posts

Name:
Nicole

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

I don't think it's greedy, but I do kind of think it's weird when people register for an e-party. I think an e-party should be a celebration of your engagement- there will be plenty of other opportunities for people to buy you gifts- ie:your shower, the holidays, birthdays, etc...

Posted 8/14/06 10:38 PM
 

JenniferEver
The Disney Lady

Member since 5/05

18163 total posts

Name:
Jennifer

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

I don't think it's greedy. I wish I could ahve had one, not for the gifts...(the people who were going to get us e-gifts got the for us anyway), but because it's such a special occasion and should be celebrated. I really wish I could ahve ahd one, since we started with a 3 year engagement and now it's going to be 4 or 5, I would have loved to have some kind of party. They're fun! I had a graduation party and I absolutely LOVED it. I invited a lot of friends who were my age or younger so I didn't "make back" the oney we'd spent, but it was the best day of my life, I had a blast. And if you're family and friends care about you they will be honored to celebrate with you.

And if they don't feel like giving a gift, they don't have to come. I dont really think of an e=party as the kind of occasion where you send a gift even if you don't go..but I could be wrong.

Posted 8/15/06 7:56 AM
 

Karen
Just chillin'!!

Member since 1/06

9690 total posts

Name:
Karen

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

Posted by Christine

I think it partially depends on your social circle and partially on timing.

It's common or expected with some people and a gift grab to others.

For me, as long as the events are spaced properly, I think it's fine. I have mentioned before about one of my friends that had an e-party, shower, b-party and wedding within 7 months when her engagement was only 15 months long. E-parties should be closer to the date of engagement then the wedding.



I totally agree with Christine. I believe that timing is key!!

Posted 8/15/06 8:01 AM
 

2PreciousBlessings
The Perfect Pair

Member since 5/06

19861 total posts

Name:
Best Wife & Mommy

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

I do not think it is greedy. When we got engaged we kept a party for both sides of the family to officially meet each other. However, we made sure to let everyone knows no gifts please. The party was more of introductory party.

Posted 8/15/06 8:01 AM
 

eroxgirl
My Loves

Member since 5/05

15697 total posts

Name:
Rebecca

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

My mom agrees with Jax' mom. She hates them and has always told me that e-parties are just an excuse to get gifts. I don't know if I necessarily feel the same way - if I'm invited to one it's very likely that I'll attend. But I know at the time of my wedding my girlfriend kept encouraging me to have one because "it's a great way to make some money for the wedding" so I guess I'm on the fence.

Posted 8/15/06 8:04 AM
 

GenLCSW
Baby # 3 is here!!!

Member since 7/05

21138 total posts

Name:
Genna

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

I didnt have one but I dont think that its greedy at all!!

Posted 8/15/06 8:15 AM
 
Pages: 1 [2] 3 4
 

Potentially Related Topics:

Topic Posted By Started Replies Forum
some pics from my friend's bachelorette party nferrandi 8/15/06 12 Pregnancy
. suvenR 6/9/05 11 Families Helping Families ™
 
Quick navigation:   
Currently 1396674 users on the LIFamilies.com Chat
New Businesses
1 More Rep
Carleton Hall of East Islip
J&A Building Services
LaraMae Health Coaching
Sonic Wellness
Julbaby Photography LLC
Ideal Uniforms
Teresa Geraghty Photography
Camelot Dream Homes
Long Island Wedding Boutique
MB Febus- Rodan & Fields
Camp Harbor
Market America-Shop.com
ACM Basement Waterproofing
Travel Tom

      Follow LIWeddings on Facebook

      Follow LIFamilies on Twitter
Long Island Bridal Shows