Spinoff to AF poll - Question for parents of girls

In hbugal's thread about the age we all got AF, a LOT of us replied with some sort of sadness, resentment, embarrassment, etc. about when we first got it.

I know I was simply MORTIFIED and kept it a secret from my friends for a LONG time and even told my mom not to tell my dad (which I'm sure she did anyway ).

My question is: How can we try to ensure that OUR daughters don't feel this way? It was so awful growing up feeling so embarrassed and ashamed of my "blossoming womanhood" and I *really* do not want my DD having those same feelings.

Any ideas? What do you all think?

Re: Spinoff to AF poll - Question for parents of girls

Well my mom never talked to me about it so when it happened we both were in shock since i was about 10.

I plan to educated/inform DD about it and just let her know that its perfectly normal, before it's too late.

I really don't know what else I could do for her.

Re: Spinoff to AF poll - Question for parents of girls

I think a good approach is to talk to your daughter about it early on, and make her feel like it is just a fact of life and nothing to be embarrassed about. My mother is a nurse, and so everything about it was very matter of fact, using all the correct anatomic terms, etc. I was always embarrassed talking about it, but it definitely helped that I knew she was not.

Re: Spinoff to AF poll - Question for parents of girls

I read Are You There God, It's me Margaret by Judy Blume. It was wonderful to read something so relatable. My mom was aware I was reading it and it opened up a wonderful dialogue about the topic.

Re: Spinoff to AF poll - Question for parents of girls

I promised myself from early on that once my kids started asking questions I would start giving them real answers...

I look at it this way. If you wait for them to be "old enough" it's too late and they dont want to talk to about it...whether we're talking about AF or sex or whatever...

My eldest daughter gets all embarrassed talking to me about these things...I didnt get to her until after she got AF at 11 almost 12. But she is limited in her understanding of things any way. Im not going to get into that one..

But I started talking to the twins when they were 8. Might seem young to some but I know that they are comfortable asking me questions about anything.

I went on Yahoo's ASK THE PLANET and was shocked to see all these young teenagers having NO CLUE about their bodies and I found it shocking the misinformation that they had...

Re: Spinoff to AF poll - Question for parents of girls

The thing is, my mom never made any of this taboo or anything. I remember VERY clearly when she broke out the diagram ... but yeah, I do plan on just making "having a period" as normal as anything else. I won't try to hide what I'm doing during that time of the month, and just make it normal.

Re: Spinoff to AF poll - Question for parents of girls

What a great question. I worry about this. I got my period at the ripe old age of 8 and was wearing a D cup by age 10. It was horrible. My mother probably didn't know how to deal with the whole or with me and she basically ended up humiliating me over and over and over again. I know she didn't do it on purpose, but the way she went about it was basically that she couldn't understand why I couldn't just deal with it. I'm sure it was killing her and making her uncomfortable, but I just wish she had more patience with me and how terrible it was for me.
I just hope that when the time comes for Ava to go through this that she'll see me as being supportive and understanding. I don't want her to be embarrassed at all, and I will do anything if it means she'll avoid that uncomfortableness that I had to go through.

Re: Spinoff to AF poll - Question for parents of girls

Re: Spinoff to AF poll - Question for parents of girls

I will be as open and honest with her as I can.

I want to speak with her about AF as soon as she can comprehend what I'm telling her w/o scaring her, b/c when I got it.... it was with excruciating pain and severe blood flow.

I don't want her to be scared of it, or anxious that it's coming, but I do want her to know that it's a fact of life, and that women deal with it everywhere.

Re: Spinoff to AF poll - Question for parents of girls