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the most recent news
Before I start, I want to thank EVERYONE who sent me an fm. As you can imagine, this isn't my regular id, so I don't always log on to see the fm's sent to this id. so, I'm sorry for the delay in reading them. But I am very grateful for all the kind words sent my way.
After I last updated you all, I was frozen into inactivity. Although I wasn't happy in the marriage before all this happened, I wasn't planning for divorce so soon after getting married, or ever. so I just did nothing for a bit.
I've thought a lot about the things he said, I also thought a lot about all that was said on here. I went through moments of making excuses for him, I went through moments of wanting to hurt him, I went through moments of wanting to run away.
In the end, I did not keep his secret. I told my cousin (who I'm very close to) and my mother. I thought my mother would tell me to stay for the sake of my child. She did not. She told me to take a minute and think: do I still love him and do I WANT to still be his wife. My answer would dictate my actions.
I did as I was told by my mommy  and I don't deserve this. Even with my low self-esteem, I know I deserve better.
The funny thing is that he's trying to be nice now. I guess he realized what he said and wants to "fix it", but he has yet to apologize. Funny. But it's too little, too late.
This is where I stand now: we're sleeping separately, I'm being civil in front of my son-but I'm not "nice". I've started to look better, I started working out and I started blowing out my hair and painting my nails. I've lost 3 lbs. Because when I have him served with divorce papers, I want to look hot!
Here is where I am really torn: we recently bought a house. I DON'T WANT TO MOVE. I want to keep the house. I don't want my child to have to move. He's been through so much. I can't afford my house on my own. I also need to look into getting a lawyer. I'm not looking forward to this.
so, if anyone knows a "bulldog" of a divorce lawyer in new jersey please send them my way.
Again, thank you all for being there for me. You have no idea how much it means to me.
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Posted 11/6/07 8:08 AM  |
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Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
GenLCSW
Baby # 3 is here!!!
Member since 7/05 21138 total posts
Name:
Genna
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Re: the most recent news
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| Posted 11/6/07 8:27 AM |
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Geraldine
Lovin Life........
Member since 5/07 2388 total posts
Name:
Geraldine
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Re: the most recent news
I'm sorry your going through this......wishing you much happiness
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| Posted 11/6/07 8:29 AM |
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2PreciousBlessings
The Perfect Pair
Member since 5/06 19861 total posts
Name:
Best Wife & Mommy
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Re: the most recent news
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| Posted 11/6/07 8:30 AM |
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Re: the most recent news
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| Posted 11/6/07 8:34 AM |
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janet
WITH LOVE MY ANGEL MISS YOU!!!
Member since 5/05 12823 total posts
Name:
janet
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Re: the most recent news
first you are making the RIGHT decision!!!!!
second remember we are all here for you through this time and will help in anyway possible.
i wish i could help you with a lawyer but i do not know anyone in nj. but i am sure someone here will. 
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| Posted 11/6/07 8:39 AM |
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LisaW
Time for me to FLY!
Member since 5/05 13199 total posts
Name:
Did I ever tell you that I hate people?
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Re: the most recent news
Good for you!!!
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| Posted 11/6/07 8:43 AM |
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CathyB
Member since 5/05 19403 total posts
Name:
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Re: the most recent news
As far as lawyers, so a search for Ambersmom. She recently asked for recommendations.
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| Posted 11/6/07 8:50 AM |
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Gertyrae
Peace out Homies!
Member since 5/05 20046 total posts
Name:
Gerty ®
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Re: the most recent news
Good for you! It sounds like you did exactly the right thing and got your head together to make a decision.
If I were you in regards to the lawyer, I would ask some friends or maybe see if your mom or cousin could ask around for you. Also, is it possible that you could make an apartment in the house so that you can get some extra income from a rental?
Good luck to you...this is a huge step and I wish you nothing but the best.
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| Posted 11/6/07 8:53 AM |
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Phyl
R.I.P. Sweet Mia ♥
Member since 5/06 28918 total posts
Name:
The Mystical Azzhorse! ™
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Re: the most recent news
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| Posted 11/6/07 8:56 AM |
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Bxgell2
Perfection
Member since 5/05 16438 total posts
Name:
Beth
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Re: the most recent news
Good for you!   I'm just so inspired when I see women who pick themselves up, wipe themselves off, and have the strength to make a new, happier life for themselves. It's going to be one long, hard road, but it will lead to true happiness now that you have found yourself and discovered your own strength. And think of the incredible example you're setting for your DC!
If you need a NJ attorney, FM me - I used to work for a large northern NJ based firm, so I'm sure I could get you a few good referrals if needed.
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| Posted 11/6/07 8:58 AM |
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LuckySV
LIF Adult
Member since 10/05 4675 total posts
Name:
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Re: the most recent news
Wishing you the best.
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| Posted 11/6/07 9:42 AM |
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littlejoy06
Love
Member since 3/07 6944 total posts
Name:
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Re: the most recent news
I'm so proud of you!!! This is a very hard decison, no one should be treated that way.
Maybe you can find someone that would rent with you?
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| Posted 11/6/07 10:18 AM |
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nov04libride
big brother <3
Member since 5/05 14672 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: the most recent news
Good luck to you!
Maybe you should visit a lawyer for a consult to get an idea of what you may be entitled to. Were you thinking you would be entitled to spousal support? Your son isn't your DH's son, right? If this wasn't a long marriage, I don't think you'll be getting monthly payments from him. It might be best to consider taking the money from the sale of the house as he offered and trying to buy a townhome or condo in the area for you and your son, instead of killing yourself trying to cover the mortgage payments for the house.
If the divorce can be cut and dry, you may be able to do it with a mediator, who would be much cheaper for you both.
Message edited 11/6/2007 10:27:21 AM.
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| Posted 11/6/07 10:26 AM |
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Deedlebugs
Blessed
Member since 12/05 10281 total posts
Name:
Kiki
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Re: the most recent news
I am so happy that you have made such a wise choice. You should be very proud of yourself...
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| Posted 11/6/07 10:32 AM |
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Stefanie
♥
Member since 5/05 23599 total posts
Name:
Stefanie
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Re: the most recent news
I'm proud that you made a wonderful decision for the sake of yourself and your son.
Congrats on the weight loss and  to a new you...who deserves much more!!!
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| Posted 11/6/07 10:35 AM |
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LadyMaravilla
Fall Is Here
Member since 5/05 12023 total posts
Name:
Sonia
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Re: the most recent news
Posted by Deedlebug126
I am so happy that you have made such a wise choice. You should be very proud of yourself...
I totally agree!!!!!!!! And always remember that a "HOUSE" doesn't always mean it's a home. Your son will be ok no matter where you live because you will make the a safe haven for him to be in...his home!
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| Posted 11/6/07 10:39 AM |
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IluvBo
NICKY & EVIE
Member since 6/05 3321 total posts
Name:
Rose
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Re: the most recent news
I know that this must have been an extremely difficult decision, BE PROUD! You are doing what is right for you! You deserve so much, much more! If you need anything..................we're here for you!
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| Posted 11/6/07 10:56 AM |
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Faithx2
All good things in 2016!!
Member since 8/05 20181 total posts
Name:
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Re: the most recent news
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| Posted 11/6/07 10:59 AM |
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PotofLuck06
Our Baby Boy Is Here!!!
Member since 11/06 13241 total posts
Name:
Betsy
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Re: the most recent news
Good for you and good luck with everything as you start to move forward!!!!
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| Posted 11/6/07 11:01 AM |
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domsmom52704
Family is everything!!!
Member since 5/05 1989 total posts
Name:
Jess
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Re: the most recent news
Good for you GIRL!!! Honestly, while I am sorry you are going through this, I am so happy and proud of you for standing up for your self! You are 100% right you DEF DO DESERVE BETTER!!!! I wish you a life of happiness!!! GO get yourself a fabulous life and better man who deserves you!
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| Posted 11/6/07 11:19 AM |
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Katie111806
Team Pink!
Member since 12/06 5349 total posts
Name:
Katie
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Re: the most recent news
I'm so sorry you are going through this. I am so proud of you for doing your best to take control of the situation and do what is right for you and your son. If there is anything we can do, please let us know.
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| Posted 11/6/07 11:23 AM |
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NewlyMrs
Laugh-Live-Love LIFE!
Member since 10/06 14432 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: the most recent news
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| Posted 11/6/07 11:41 AM |
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Dani922
Here's to new beginnings
Member since 10/07 7260 total posts
Name:
Danielle
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Re: the most recent news
I'm so sorry you have to go through this, but I am so glad that you are doing what you know is best for yourself & your son.
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| Posted 11/6/07 12:05 PM |
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Re: the most recent news
I'm so sorry for what you're going through but I'm glad that you were able to make the best decision for you and your DS. We're always here for support, may you continue to have strength during this trying time.
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| Posted 11/6/07 12:43 PM |
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