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Re: This is going to sound ungrateful but I am upset because I feel that my children are getting the gift shaft!
I think its a twin thing. I just found out my mom gave my twin cousins $50 each for their christening. I told her she should have given at least $100 each and her response was but I had to give to two. That wasn't right, but it is the way some people think.
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Posted 12/3/07 6:20 AM  |
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Long Island Weddings
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CrankyPants
I'm cranky
Member since 7/06 18178 total posts
Name:
Mama Cranky
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Re: This is going to sound ungrateful but I am upset because I feel that my children are getting the gift shaft!
I guess I am in the minority here-I don't think a person has to give/spend the same per person amt for twins as they would for one.
I think it is important to recognize and celebrate each of the children individually, and I wouldn't automatically divide a gift in half, however I also understand that it is difficult for folks to cough up double the amount they would normally spend for an event. It's easier to "splurge" for one than it is for two.
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| Posted 12/3/07 8:42 AM |
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maybebaby
LIF Adult
Member since 11/05 6870 total posts
Name:
Maureen
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Re: This is going to sound ungrateful but I am upset because I feel that my children are getting the gift shaft!
Posted by architectnycity
I think its a twin thing. I just found out my mom gave my twin cousins $50 each for their christening. I told her she should have given at least $100 each and her response was but I had to give to two. That wasn't right, but it is the way some people think.
But i totally understand your moms thinking...if i were invited right now to a christening for twins there is no way I could give $200 total. If its not there, its not there...
$50 per child is fine. A gift is a gift..that is how I feel. We all do what we can and hope that the recipient isn't "tracking" how much was received...I know I have never done that.
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| Posted 12/3/07 9:35 AM |
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Mommy2Boys
My Boys!!!!
Member since 6/06 14437 total posts
Name:
C
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Re: This is going to sound ungrateful but I am upset because I feel that my children are getting the gift shaft!
I know how you feel. It's not about the money, it's the principle. I consider myself to be very thoughtful and generous and it is not always returned.
ETA: I have a couple sets of twins in my family and growing up my parents always gave the same. If she gave $100 on one child's christening, she would give $200 for a twins' christening.
Message edited 12/3/2007 11:22:13 AM.
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| Posted 12/3/07 10:39 AM |
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NY031978
LIF Infant
Member since 8/06 102 total posts
Name:
Alana
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Re: This is going to sound ungrateful but I am upset because I feel that my children are getting the gift shaft!
id feel the same way...esp now that I have a child I see what Ive given and theres times or well certain ppl that def dont give back!! i think you do have a right to feel sad...
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| Posted 12/4/07 10:53 AM |
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Kierasmom
I love my kids
Member since 5/05 2885 total posts
Name:
Jenn
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Re: This is going to sound ungrateful but I am upset because I feel that my children are getting the gift shaft!
Posted by CrankyPants
I guess I am in the minority here-I don't think a person has to give/spend the same per person amt for twins as they would for one.
I think it is important to recognize and celebrate each of the children individually, and I wouldn't automatically divide a gift in half, however I also understand that it is difficult for folks to cough up double the amount they would normally spend for an event. It's easier to "splurge" for one than it is for two.
That's how I feel as well. It's easier for me to be a little more generous with one child than it is to be as generous with 2 at once. I still like to think that I am generous and that I give good gifts but I just can't afford to give too much when its twins.
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| Posted 12/4/07 6:19 PM |
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Holly
Prayers to those who need them
Member since 5/05 6631 total posts
Name:
Holly
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Re: This is going to sound ungrateful but I am upset because I feel that my children are getting the gift shaft!
I can understand being upset about people who say they have a gift, and never give it...that has to be annoying...
However, on the flipside, if someone gave you a large gift for your twins, would you return the favor if they had just one? Like if I gave you 2 carseats because you had twins, would you give me a gift equal to what I spent on those 2 carseats?
I have friends with twins, and would NEVER expect them to return the favor equal to what I spent on them...I spend what I do because I want to, not because I want someone to return the favor someday that I have kids.
Who knows, I have no children, so maybe my opinion will change once I do...
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| Posted 12/4/07 6:50 PM |
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Re: This is going to sound ungrateful but I am upset because I feel that my children are getting the gift shaft!
To the OP, many many I would be hurt too. When I got married, more than a few people gave much much less than I had given and it hurt but I eventually just forgot about it. I will now think twice when it comes to those people! (as I know it wasn't an affordability issue with them).
That being said, I do agree with some of the other posters about not being able to always give double for twins. I would give more than what I would for one for sometimes double the money is hard to come by these days and I would hope that the parents would understand.
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| Posted 12/4/07 7:52 PM |
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