toddler moms (help plz.)

since josh started walking at 10 1/2 months he refuses to let me hold his hand when he walks. i see other kids his age walking so nicely with their parents but josh will try to take his hand away or drop to the floor. if i let him walk on his own he just runs like a mad man and i end up picking him up or plopping him in his stroller.

how do i teach him how to hold my hand and walk nicely or will this just come with age (he's 16 months)?

tia!

Message edited 9/20/2008 6:37:07 PM.

Re: toddler moms (help plz.)

Madison has always refused to hold my hand too and she's 15 months tomorrow. Not sure how to force her to do it!

Re: toddler moms (help plz.)

Christopher loves to hold my hand and just holds it out for me to take. But he has done that since he learned to walk a month ago.

Sorry, that probably doesn't help, huh?

Re: toddler moms (help plz.)

Maybe you could get a harness

Re: toddler moms (help plz.)

Posted by Summerrluvv

Maybe you could get a harness

Re: toddler moms (help plz.)

Gracie used to do this. I would get out the stroller and take it with us even if she was walking with me. If she refused to hold my hand I would say "hold my hand or you go in the stroller". After 3 times of her not holding my hand and putting her in the stroller as she SCREAMED her head off (this was a control thing with her). She stopped it. She knows to hold hands now. She used to let go of my hand in parking lots and that is when I started getting the stroller out again. she HATES the stroller now, so she knows hold mommies hand or she sits in the stroller.

It may be a control issue with him, it was with Grace. I was so worried b/c once Grace let go in a crowed parking lot and ran off. I had to scoop her up and hold her while she was kicking a screaming to get down. After that, mommy stopped being a softee and toughened up. Thank goodness it only took three times with the stroller trick and it did not go on for a while.

HTH & Good Luck!

Message edited 9/20/2008 7:02:46 PM.

Re: toddler moms (help plz.)

Ava is the same exact way. I hold her wrist because she hates to hold me hand. She still wiggles and squirms, but if she drops to her knees, I don't even say anything, I just pick her up and continue without skipping a beat. I don't like to draw attention to it by having an argument. I always tell her she has to hold my hand, before hand, though.

Re: toddler moms (help plz.)

Jared is 3 years old and he HATES to hold my hand especially when we're crossing the street. It drives me crazy. He just likes to walk close next to me.
I grab his wrist and hold that. He hates it. Oh well..

Re: toddler moms (help plz.)

My DD kind of grew into it at about 18 months. Before that she hated it. Now she knows when she has to hold my hand (ie, parking lots, the street).

Re: toddler moms (help plz.)

thanks for all the advice guys. at least i know that my ds isn't the only one!

dina, i'm going to try your stroller trick, thanks!

Re: toddler moms (help plz.)

I kinda forced the matter the first few ties, but holding TIGHT and not letting go and when he threw him self inevitably on the ground, back in the stroller he went. He will now hold my hand nicely about 90% of the time.

Re: toddler moms (help plz.)

This post sounds exactly like my DD except she just turned 15 months. She started walking around 10.5 months too until 12 months she held my hand - now she rips her hand out of mine and squats and folds her arms. The minute I put her down she runs away. I try to keep her in the stroller as much as I can - but now when she wants out she just sits in the stroller - saying or yelling OUT OUT OUT OUT.

I try to hold her hand firmly but that doesn't help. She does the same thing for DH and my parents. For now when she gets like this I pick her up (which she hates) or I put her back in the stroller.

We leave for disney this week. I'm afraid she might try to run and since she is so small she squeezes into places most adults can't - so I caved in at many friends suggestions and got an animal backpack harness that I will bring but hope to not use. But that doesn't help with our situation when we are at he mall or the zoo etc. If you figure it out let me know.

Re: toddler moms (help plz.)

There are no choices with things like this for me. My kids either hold my hand or I put her in the stroller and let her scream. After a few times she got it and now will hold my hand. But the minute she throws a fit or tries to squirm away, in the stroller she goes.

Re: toddler moms (help plz.)

Re: toddler moms (help plz.)

in the beginning, mikayla did not want to hold my hand (at around 13-15 months)...recently, she began doing it. If she does not hold my hand she gets held or put into a shopping cart if we are going into a store. One day she just started doing it, now she reaches out for my hand when we are walking into her room or walking into the bathroom, etc

Re: toddler moms (help plz.)

This might help a bit....sometimes it's in the way that you are holding their hand that is uncomfortable for them. They have such tiny hands after all. You have them hold your index finger and then you clasp your hand around theirs. I dont know how else to explain it.

The twins had me do it this way...they were so verbal at an early age and told me that it was uncomfortable and came up with this instead.

And the "you hold my hand or you go back in the stroller works too"...just dont give too many warnings. Give one warning and then it's BAM back in the stroller.

Re: toddler moms (help plz.)

My DD started really walkign well at 15 months. She had been walking with holding our hands for 3 months prior to this, and I think she took it as an insult when she had to hold hands again, in a store.

If I put her down to walk and took her hand, she would drop to the floor and scream. I just ignored her and picked her up and continued. No negotiation. Now I will say "You have to hold my hand if you want to walk" And there is no argument. Either she does it, or she says UP, and goes into the shopping cart.

It took a few weeks, but we were very consistant. She is 17 months now and holds hands very nicely. When she tried on shoes in a shoe store, she held DH's hand the whole time, because she knew she was out, and not at home.

Re: toddler moms (help plz.)

Re: toddler moms (help plz.)

neither of my kids like(d) to hold hands. With my older one we had him in overalls as much as possible so we had something to hold onto.

the younger one is a tony bit better...I let him walk, but put myself in between him and danger (I demonstrated this at the cow harbor parade today, if anyone was there LOL) - it's like being a soccer goalie. If it's not a situation where I can do this - they are strapped into the stroller.


ETA: it does get better! but it will be a long phase.

Message edited 9/21/2008 1:17:44 PM.