Totally feeling overwhelmed

and having one emotional breakdown after another over here..

Poor DH works his arse off for us. I've been out of work for a few months now but I have several little side businesses that I do from home. That's been great for us as I have been able to stay home and play suzy housewife while DH is off working insane 14 hour days.

I try to take care of everything at home so when he comes home he can simply relax and have dinner ready for him, his next day's outfit is all pressed and ready to go on the inside of the closet, his paper is out and waiting, etc..

I can't help but think (and dread) how I won't be able to keep up with it all once arrives. The stuff I do here at home is literally a full time job. He tries to take care of some things himself (like he'll pull out the vacuum cleaner) but I get upset when he does because I feel like he does his part at work all day and there is no reason why he should have to pitch in at home when I'm here all day... I know things are going to change once the baby is born but I feel overwhelmed already.

What can I do now to prepare us for having everything reprioritized? This little guy isn't even here yet and I'm so scared already!!

Re: Totally feeling overwhelmed

you sounds like an amazing wife (i wish i could do all that for DH!) and you are going to be a great mommy. i am SURE your DH knows that things are going to change when the baby comes. it's totally normal!

i would suggest that you let DH go to work in wrinkled clothes but if you are worried about meals, why don't you start making some now in big batches and freezing them? that way you won't have to cook when the baby gets here, and you will both have hot meals whenever you want.

you will both make adjustments - and you will both do just fine.

Re: Totally feeling overwhelmed

wow.. you seem like a great wife! im sure your husband sees how wonderful you are by trying to make it as easy as possible for him... but if he does offer to do things now.. im sure when comes, DH will help you out knowing how much work it is.. i wouldnt stress out too much over it, i feel the same way about my situation, he knows you can only do so much!!

Re: Totally feeling overwhelmed

Awwwe sweetie !! It will change for alittle while but once you have a schedule for you and everything will work out

Re: Totally feeling overwhelmed

I put a lot of pressure on myself like you do. I try to be everything and do it all. I work outside the home for 11-12 hours per day and still cook dinner each night and all the other things. I realize I can't once comes.

I think you need to realize that will add a whole new dimension to your responsibilities. So, home or not, you are taking on a new 24/7 job! Thats way more than your DH's 14 hour days. I'm sure he does not expect you to take care of 24/7, run your businesses and cater to him. Just talk to him about it so he knows how you feel. He'll be touched that you are so concerned about him and want to take care of him. I'm sure you can work out ways to share the responsibilities and be very happy.

Re: Totally feeling overwhelmed

Aw Laura, I'm sorry you are feeling so overwhelmed! and kudos on being an awesome wife! Frank is a lucky man.
However, when your you will be taking on a 24/7 job, and I would hope that Frank will do more to help you out.
As it is now, both DH and I both work FT jobs, however I am also in grad school. So I come home and am beyond dead...I do expect DH to pull his weight with household cores, ie cooking dinner and doing laundry...its not fair to pin it all on one person.
Try not to go too crazy doing things...if something doesn't get done then so be it.
I know with having my summers off I will have to pull my weight a lot more around the house, and thats' fine, however if I feel like having a lazy day or am busy doing other things, I expect my DH help me out with whatever he can.

Re: Totally feeling overwhelmed

You are SuperWife!! Don't be so hard on yourself. Let family / friends cook some meals for you once the baby is here. Tell them how much it would help! Also, try to prioritize and figure out what can slide and what can't. If you have things prioritized where you KNOW you can't do without, then you won't feel like the weight of the world is on your shoulders. Also, if your husband WANTS to help, let him!! I am sure he doesn't think any less of you. Marriage and children are a partnership. You don't have to be SuperMom and SuperWife.

Re: Totally feeling overwhelmed

I am sure you will be able to juggle both a baby and doing things for your husband. However it is important not to over extend yourself. Your DH has to help out as well. Just because he is the only one going out of the house to work doesnt mean that he should be able to do just nothing around the house.

Re: Totally feeling overwhelmed

you'll be fine...


right now, DH and I are both working and our home is in varying degrees of

when the baby comes, you'll just have to sacrifice the cleaning for the sake of taking care of baby.... and frankly, your DH will totally understand..

so don't stress!