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What are some funny quotes said by your students?

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apb17
My guys

Member since 5/06

2173 total posts

Name:
Alli

What are some funny quotes said by your students?

I've been teaching for 8 years now and my kids have said some hysterical things. Are there some things that you'll NEVER forget?
I'll start. I'm out on maternity leave and I just went to visit my students the other day. Its been 6 weeks since I had my little guy. One of my students (8th grader) who is kind of troubled says, "Damn, Mrs.--- your stomach got flat!" I think it was the funniest and best compliment the I've received in a while. Another wanted to know, "Do you know who the baby daddy is?"Chat Icon Mind you he's been using "Mrs." for the past 2 years!!
Some of them are too much.

Posted 1/14/07 12:46 PM
 

MissJones
I need a nap!

Member since 5/05

22136 total posts

Name:

Re: What are some funny quotes said by your students?

Posted by apb17

Another wanted to know, "Do you know who the baby daddy is?"Chat Icon Mind you he's been using "Mrs." for the past 2 years!!
Some of them are too much.




Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

I guess it's not so much what they say but what they do. I have 1st graders, so sometimes their faces are hysterical!!! I'm drawing a blank on comments righ tnow, but the other day, we had a field trip. I was sitting next to one of my boys who looked like he was contemplating themeaning of life. Turns out, he was. I ask him what he's thinking about. He looks at me and asks me how we got here, how the world was made, where did it come from, etc...I mean, he was REALLY trying to figure it all out. It was hard to answer him b/c the boy next to us chimes in with "I know how the earth was made...it was God" and man, trying to explain the possibilities was difficult. Chat Icon

Posted 1/14/07 2:08 PM
 

apb17
My guys

Member since 5/06

2173 total posts

Name:
Alli

Re: What are some funny quotes said by your students?

Awww....too cuteChat Icon

Posted 1/14/07 3:35 PM
 

Arieschick29
aries+cancer= pisces&gemini

Member since 3/06

4268 total posts

Name:
Jen

Re: What are some funny quotes said by your students?

not my student..but the 6th graders go to the district H.S for swimming lessons in the middle of the year

One female student started freaking out in the shallow end yelling "i cant do it! I cant do it!"

Her teacher went over to her, quite perturbed by her childish behavior and said "Why?! Whats wrong?"

The girl yelled back

"I cant breathe underwater!"

The teacher replied: "Honey NO ONE can!"

Posted 1/14/07 6:23 PM
 

cj7305
=)

Member since 8/05

12296 total posts

Name:

Re: What are some funny quotes said by your students?

Man, there are so many. Most recently two cars had been in an accident on the block where our school is so our dismissal was slightly delayed. I was explaining to the class that someone had an accident in front of the school so we'd be there a little while longer. Well, one of my 1st graders comes up to me very seriously and confused looking & whispers, why did someone poop in the road?

Get it, accidentChat Icon

Posted 1/14/07 8:55 PM
 

Jen2999
Baby girls & beagles rock!

Member since 8/06

10356 total posts

Name:
Jen

Re: What are some funny quotes said by your students?

Ok I teach middle school and these kids SCARE Me

best one this year was asked to the science teacher on my team

"ummmm If you held a star in your hand, would it be like POINTY or HOT"


....

Chat Icon

Posted 1/14/07 10:03 PM
 

justthe4ofus
I hate hypocrites!!!!!

Member since 5/05

6905 total posts

Name:

Re: What are some funny quotes said by your students?

The lastest was:

Señora, I have a question.

Yes Pablo what is it?

My cousin said that your boogers are dead brain cells

Me: Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Me: Pablo are you serious with the question?

Yes señora

Ok Pablo then I must ask are you losing a lot of brain cells?

Yes señora

Ok that explains it. Pablo it's not true. B

But señora my 22 year old cousin that's in college said it's true.

How many years has he been in college

5

What year is he in?


Freshman

Pablo, honey it's not true


But señora he said it is

Pablo if you don't believe me ask your science teacher.

Science teacher hands him a box of tissues and tells you him to try and save as many as possible

5 days later-- señora I saw my cousin again and he said it's definitely true. He knows because he is taking the same course again for the third time!!!

OK Pablo Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 1/14/07 11:20 PM
 

katiebell
Hoping, wishing, waiting....

Member since 8/06

1418 total posts

Name:
K

Re: What are some funny quotes said by your students?

My class always laughs at me because I am always misplacing things or dropping things, so one day last year after I misplaced something I said to the class, Oh, I am just falling apart. Then one of my first graders, looks at me up and down, and says, Mrs. L. what are you talking about, you aren't falling apart, you are all together!! It took all I had not to laugh out loud!

Posted 1/14/07 11:34 PM
 

ml110
LIF Adult

Member since 1/06

5435 total posts

Name:

Re: What are some funny quotes said by your students?

i'm a speech therapist, and we were working on comparing and contrasting things.... so the question was " whats the difference between a teacher and the principal?" and the kid goes " the teacher works, and the principal doesn't"
LOL oh man, sooo glad i wasn't getting observed that day!

Posted 1/14/07 11:41 PM
 

MomofMandB
LIF Infant

Member since 7/06

323 total posts

Name:
Jen

Re: What are some funny quotes said by your students?

My first year teaching (15 and 1/2 years ago), I was teaching in the South Bronx and on a field trip with fifth graders. I asked one of the boys, "Are you excited to go to middle school?" He replied, "I can't wait! There are slunts there!!!" Me: "What are slunts?" Ely: "Girls.....that let you touch their butts!"
...still one of the funniest moments! (You should have heard me trying to explain all the reasons that was a BAD thing to look forward to!)

Posted 1/15/07 6:21 AM
 

MrsProfessor
hi

Member since 5/05

14279 total posts

Name:

Re: What are some funny quotes said by your students?

These are too funny. Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 1/15/07 8:53 AM
 

jes81276
summer fun!

Member since 3/06

4962 total posts

Name:
Jaime

Re: What are some funny quotes said by your students?

Posted by ml110

i'm a speech therapist, and we were working on comparing and contrasting things.... so the question was " whats the difference between a teacher and the principal?" and the kid goes " the teacher works, and the principal doesn't"
LOL oh man, sooo glad i wasn't getting observed that day!




OMGChat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 1/15/07 10:16 AM
 

want2beamom
Love my boys soooo much!!!

Member since 8/06

10164 total posts

Name:
True love doesn't end with happily ever after...

Re: What are some funny quotes said by your students?

One of my third graders was sitting on the floor in his classroom. I walked into the room, and he looked up at me and said "Are you going to give birth?" (I am 21 weeks pregnant). I thought it was sooo funny!!!

Posted 1/15/07 12:30 PM
 

Tah-wee-ZAH
Kisses

Member since 5/05

15952 total posts

Name:

Re: What are some funny quotes said by your students?

Posted by jes81276

Posted by ml110

i'm a speech therapist, and we were working on comparing and contrasting things.... so the question was " whats the difference between a teacher and the principal?" and the kid goes " the teacher works, and the principal doesn't"
LOL oh man, sooo glad i wasn't getting observed that day!




OMGChat Icon Chat Icon



Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Sad thing is I've been in a few employment situations where this is trueChat Icon The kid has a point.

Posted 1/15/07 1:45 PM
 

4monkeys
boys will be boys =)

Member since 9/05

7205 total posts

Name:
:)

Re: What are some funny quotes said by your students?

Posted by ml110

i'm a speech therapist, and we were working on comparing and contrasting things.... so the question was " whats the difference between a teacher and the principal?" and the kid goes " the teacher works, and the principal doesn't"
LOL oh man, sooo glad i wasn't getting observed that day!




Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 1/22/07 9:30 PM
 

beautyq115
New Year!

Member since 5/05

13729 total posts

Name:
Me

Re: What are some funny quotes said by your students?

When I taught second grade this little girl announced my bra and panties were showing....gee thanks...this was infront of 2 classes and some parentsChat Icon SHe always let me know when my underwear was sticking out

Posted 1/23/07 6:41 PM
 

Stefanie

Member since 5/05

23599 total posts

Name:
Stefanie

Re: What are some funny quotes said by your students?

A student in my 3rd grade class decided to tell everyone that he watched his mom give birth to his younger brother. He asked me this:

I have one question...what's that thing down there...it kinda looks like roast beef...

Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

I told him I didn't know...lol...


Posted 1/23/07 9:48 PM
 

beautyq115
New Year!

Member since 5/05

13729 total posts

Name:
Me

Re: What are some funny quotes said by your students?

Posted by Stefanie

A student in my 3rd grade class decided to tell everyone that he watched his mom give birth to his younger brother. He asked me this:

I have one question...what's that thing down there...it kinda looks like roast beef...

Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

I told him I didn't know...lol...





OMGChat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 1/23/07 10:06 PM
 

MrsPowers
So blessed!

Member since 11/06

10348 total posts

Name:
Ivelysse

Re: What are some funny quotes said by your students?

"I don't have my essay today because my tutor has it."

To which I replied, "I hope you didn't pay your tutor then."

Posted 1/24/07 9:00 PM
 

zuzuspetals
LIF Adolescent

Member since 1/07

812 total posts

Name:

Re: What are some funny quotes said by your students?

Im a special education teacher ... inclusion ... so I co teach!

As we are going around checking HW ...

Student: I have good news and bad news

Teacher: Ok, Whats the bad news?

STudent: I didnt do my HW

Teacher: And whats the good news?

Student: I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance.

We almost died!

Posted 1/24/07 9:18 PM
 

VirginiaDeb
Don't eat me, hippo!

Member since 5/05

9252 total posts

Name:
Deb

Re: What are some funny quotes said by your students?

A conversation between 3 5th graders...
K: Girl
D: Girl
C: Boy

D and C are "Dating"

K to D: I don't know how you're dating C.

C: Well you dated me in 2nd grade.

K: Well that's when I was young and stupid.


Also, another 5th grader, to me.

Miss Z. You should quit teaching and go on Baywatch. You'd make a lot more money.

Posted 1/24/07 9:22 PM
 

nyteacher13
Three Under Four!!! :-)

Member since 8/06

6405 total posts

Name:
~ THERESA ~

Re: What are some funny quotes said by your students?

This one isn't "ha ha" funny, but it's still "funny".

So I'm a collaborative teacher in English and SS classes (8th grade). One of my students today asked me if I was the "HELPER" in the classroom.

HARDY-FREAKIN HAR!!!

Honey, and of course I didn't say this, I have THREE certifications, two degrees, 8 years of college AND 7 years of teaching experience - I really don't THINK that I'm a TA. (No offense to TA's because I started out as one AND my TA is THE best in the world!!!)

Plus, has she been SLEEPING for the past five months because, last I checked, I COTEACH with the "real teachers"Chat Icon in the classroom each and every day!

KIDS!!! Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Could you tell me when special ed teachers will get cut a break? We really get it from ALL ENDS!!!

Posted 1/25/07 4:38 PM
 
 

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