What is Dh's share of the responsibilities

What does your DH do as far as the kids go?


What about household responsibilities?


Do you work as well?

Re: What is Dh's share of the responsibilities

For the kids... well, right now I'm on maternity leave so I have the time to take care of most of that stuff, but when I am working (I work full-time), he is responsible for waking up with them, getting them ready and to school, because I go to work early before they wake up.

We both get home around the same time. He usually cooks dinner, while I tidy up the house, and play with Alex and feed Yael. He usually cleans up after dinner, while I start getting them both ready for bed.

Then I put Yael to sleep, while he puts Alex to sleep.

Other than that, he usually takes care of the garbage, cleans the dishes, puts them away, cuts the grass, takes our cars in for servicing when they need it, etc.

Re: What is Dh's share of the responsibilities

I'm a SAHM, and in grad school.

DH bathes DS, and usually puts him to sleep. Sometimes when he hears him wake up before me he will get him in the morning and change him and feed him.

DH does the laundry, takes out the garbage, fixes everything, takes cars in for servicing, sometimes dinner, and anything else that I ask him.

DH works full time, and is going to grad school so he has a lot on his plate, but he misses DS so much during the day that he can't wait to do bath time, and put him to sleep so he can see him and play with him for a bit

Re: What is Dh's share of the responsibilities

I work F/T and teach grad classes online at night and on weekends. DH works F/T as well.

DH takes care of all of the outside house stuff, which takes up a lot of his time, especially in summer. He takes down the garbage. He does the last bottle and changing at night. We generally give DS baths together.

Everything else I do--shopping, cooking, cleaning...DH is wonderful with DS, but when he changes him he just leaves dirty outfits on the floor, and empty bottles all around that I find AFTER running the dishwasher the next time...But I am lucky--he loves DS and it is so cute to watch him making up silly songs and loving on him.

Re: What is Dh's share of the responsibilities

I do all of the baby care for the most part. He will help if asked

He cooks and does all the cleaning except for laundry snd dishes which I do

Re: What is Dh's share of the responsibilities

At the moment-0

But, we ebb and flow. Currently, I am not working, so DH is working a lot of OT to help that difference. When I was working, DH did the crux of childcare WHILE working,so I can't really complain in the long run.

Re: What is Dh's share of the responsibilities

The way we handle responsibilities is we take turns. One night I will put her to bed and he will clean up the kitchen and all the toys. The next night he will put her to bed and I'll clean. It sounds good in theory but it tends to break down at times.

As for cleaning, I do the bathroom, mop, dust, vaccuum. He does the garbage and the recycling.

Re: What is Dh's share of the responsibilities

DH handles all the outside house stuff & cleans the floors; does the bathroom & kitchen & usually cooks (if he's home)...I handle 99% of the childcare duties. He'll give a bottle if I ask or bring them to his mom's in the am (IF I ASK) but feeding a bottle & leaving it in the LR or giving DD the dinner (I put out for her) & then leaving the dirty tray on the table & the bib on the floor...um, sometimes its just easier to do it yourself.

Of course I'd love if he pitched in more; I had been home all summer (teacher) so a lot fell on me. Now that I'm back working, I'm finding myself exhausted w/ working FT & caring for 2 babies & running out to my mom's & his picking up the kids.

Re: What is Dh's share of the responsibilities

For DD-I generally do most of her "upkeep". DH can do (I make sure he stays in good practice by having him do it every now and then), but it's my type A personality to take over.

I give her a bath and get her dressed (I like to pick out her outfits), I clip her nails, do her hair, etc.

We alternate reading to her and putting her to bed.

We alternate cleaning up her toys (though generally, she helps before we take her upstairs).

As for the household duties-I do the cleaning inside (bathrooms, dusting, vacuuming, etc). We trade off the daily stuff-dishwasher, vacuuming, laundry.

Dh does the outside.

Re: What is Dh's share of the responsibilities

Besides not annoying me and getting in the way... Joking...

He used to put DD down for bed, but her recent insane sep anxiety won't allow for that...so it's back to me...
He does the weekends that he's not in school...I'm a SAHM so I go do my things by myself or with friends on the weekends and DH is with DD during the day He also tends to the dog when he gets home from work and does what needs to be done around the house....I'm trying to get him onto laundry, but g-d knows he'll end up breaking the washer and dryer

Re: What is Dh's share of the responsibilities

I am presently a SAHM on a leave of absence from teaching. My DH does a lot. As far as the children go he changes them in the morning and feeds them breakfast. At night he puts their pajamas on. He often bathes them. On the weekends he changes them more than I do to make up for the time he is not here during the week. He washes my DD's bottles and I mostly wash my DS's sippy cups. ETA: If he is home and we are going out I pick out the outfits and he dresses them when I finish getting ready. He takes a lot quicker to get ready so it works out.

As far as household responsibilities I do most of the cooking, but he washes most of the dishes. Sometimes if he is home he will prep the meal and then I will cook it. I do most of the cleaning just because I think I do a better job, but if I ask him to clean something he will. He does a lot of the food shopping when I watch the kids. I find it hard going food shopping with 2 under 2 when he is at work.

Message edited 9/12/2009 9:28:01 AM.

Re: What is Dh's share of the responsibilities

We both work. DH gets DD ready in the mornings for day care, though I take a few minutes on Sunday and lay out all her clothes for the week and fix her bag. I usually pick her up. I'd say it's pretty much 50/50 as far as her care goes. We both bathe, do diapers/work on potty training/read and play, etc.

I do nearly all of the cooking and DH does dishes. He does all the washing/drying of clothes and I fold and put away. We both have chores that we fell into as regular things- he vaccuums, deals with garbage, deals with the cat box, sweeps. I do all the straightening/organizing, clean the bathrooms, dust, make beds/change sheets. We both grocery shop. If I do a smidge more (and I don't know that I do) I don't mind because DH does all the chores I hate.

I like that it's always felt like a partnership. He does a lot.

Re: What is Dh's share of the responsibilities

sahm.

house wise, pretty much nothing. I ususally do everything while he is working. he works 60 hours a week, and was working a second job this summer.

josh wise, complete lifesaver. this pregnancy has been too much with these migraines.

yesterday they went bike riding, the day before fishing and the pet store. earlier in the week the library he will always be fun dad.

Re: What is Dh's share of the responsibilities

we both work full time. DH works longer hours than i do, but we have different days off.

i am responsible for washing dishes and cooking. DH is responsible for the litter, the diaper genie, and the garbage. he also vacuums. i clean the bathroom. on our tiny apartment there isn't much more to do.



when we both work, i get DS up in the morning before the nanny gets here. i am also home first, so i feed DS dinner usually before DH gets home. then DH hangs out with DS while i cook. if i don't feel like cooking, DH is quick to volunteer.

we both play with him for a couple of hours before bed. we both change him and put him down.

on days when DH is off, he is home with DS all day and does the same stuff i do on the weekends.

honestly, whoever is home and not busy does what needs to be done for DS. i never thought of splitting responsibilities. we both just do it.

Re: What is Dh's share of the responsibilities

I'd say 60/40. I work 3.5 days a week, he works doubles on my days off. He's home with them 2 days a week. They are at daycare 1.5 days a week.

I'm the one who gets up with them at night (because they want me), I do most of the shopping. I also do most of the kid related stuff: dr's appts, laundry, playdates, etc. I always put them both down for bed because they won't let him do it (even though he's tried).

We divide the cooking. On the days I'm home, I cook. On the days he's home, he cooks. We bath the kids together just because it's easier.

He does the laundry and deep cleaning (I know- I'm very blessed).

I always say I have the best wife. But all kidding aside, I really do think my DH is the most amazing daddy and as well as an incredible partner.

Re: What is Dh's share of the responsibilities

We both work and we both share all of the responsibilities in the house with the exception of cooking and mowing the lawn. I am the only cook and he is the only lawn mower. Anything else is fair game and we split everything as evenly as we can.
When we had Ava, we both agreed that parenting and household chores needed to be both our responsibilities, as we're both her parents and we both live in this house together. Sometimes I'm pulling more weight and sometimes he's pulling more weight depending on our schedules, but it works for us and we rarely feel resentful of each other.

Re: What is Dh's share of the responsibilities

DH does the dishes, laundry, when he's home (her bottles, her diapers, bath and bedtime--story), we split cooking but its been him more recently, he feeds the dogs and gives their meds...he likes to vacuum too for some strange reason

I take care of DD and dogs during the day, school full time (and teach online)....

We both basically do whatever we can when, and help each other out....although I will admit DH does more to help me out than I do for him

Re: What is Dh's share of the responsibilities

I'm a SAHM.

On the weekends DH does most of the child care stuff since he doesn't see them at all during the week. He says that he wants to spend as much time as possible with them and give me a chance to get some time to myself since that doesn't happen really on weekdays.

As far as house stuff, I pretty much do everything. If I haven't gotten around to taking the trash out to the curb on garbage night he'll do that, but that's about it. It's ok, he works long hours and I want him to be able to relax when he gets home.