work/ life balance as a mom..

Are any other working mommies struggling right now? My job is only getting more demanding and I'm often expected to come in early or stay late. Honestly I'm not interested in a career, I work to pay the bills. DS is 14 months and it's getting harder for me to be away from him now..it was so much easier when all he did was eat and sleep. Has anyone decided to cut back their hours, work part-time or get a less demanding job if you were struggling with this too...I'm at a crossroads right now..I need to work but I think I need to cut back or make some sort of change. Sorry if I'm rambling! I really just want to find a good balance and enjoy my time with DS!

Re: work/ life balance as a mom..

It's really hard to find a good balance. I've passed up several higher paying jobs to stay where I am, where the hours are good (7:30-3:30), and very close to home. I'd love to go part-time, but in this economy in my organization the part-timers are the first to go, so...Full time I will stay. I use all of my sick and vacation days as I accrue them (I earn 1 a week, and use it.)

Re: work/ life balance as a mom..

I was having a really tough time balancing it all and unfortunately for me it carried over to my work

I was recently let go because I had been having a rough time at work keeping up with my job repsonsibilities. We were understaffed and overworked and I let my work suffer unfortuanately.

I wish I had been able to find an easier job before they let me go that would have helped me balance it better.


Or I wish I had been able to ask to go PT but DH's job wouldn't let us do that for financial reasons.


Make the decision before it effects your job to do what you want that will make you happier! I wish I did!

Re: work/ life balance as a mom..

Its tough. I am fortunate that I have great hours. 7:30 to 3:30. I will probably keep these hours for life. But it's still tough. I have a long commute and trying to take care of DS, the house and DH is trying at best.

Re: work/ life balance as a mom..

I work p/t and go to school 1 night a week and I have a really hard time balancing everything. I can't imagine working full time. I give you a lot of credit.

Re: work/ life balance as a mom..

I work a "reduced/80%" schedule. That means, I took a pay cut and don't go in on Fridays but basically work a full-time week, but in 4 days. It's hard, I'm always rushing to and from work during the week and going on not enough sleep and a lot of coffee, but I live for my Fridays with DD, and DH took a vacation day last Friday so it was extra nice to have that time with both of them.

I also have help (the nanny takes care of DD's laundry and often does ours too even though it's not her job to do it), and a weekly housekeeper, and I do almost all of my household shopping online - btw FreshDirect, Diapers.com, Amazon, and Soap.com, I rarely have to go to Target, etc. on the weekend. I also plan to automate all the bills - just one less thing to worry about. Cooking and working out has really fallen to the wayside though - I need to find a way to fit those in and may start accepting sauce and meatball shipments from MIL. All in all, I have decent balance, but I am exhausted, and get a decent amount of help - I don't know how anyone does it alone!

Re: work/ life balance as a mom..

I am right there with you. I'm a teacher so "technically" I have great hours...in the door at 7, out by 2:40, supposedly...

I had promised myself that work was JUST going to be work this year, since I now have 2 kids. It just doesn't work that way for teachers...either the work and planning gets done after school on MY time, or on my Saturday or Sunday night.

DH and I have ZERO sex life right now. We're both too tired, we're both run ragged.

I feel like my kids are growing up and I'm missing it because I'm putting in 50-hour workweeks.

And people say that teachers have it easy. I'm ready to go apply at a McDonald's somewhere.

Re: work/ life balance as a mom..

Re: work/ life balance as a mom..

I am very fortunate, I work PT right now (3 days a week) and I love the balance. I do take work home with me, but that is okay with me. I took a 40% pay cut, but that is fine with me too. If you can find a work/home balance IMO it is so worth it.

I am very fortunate and I so hope I can do this for a long time. I put in 110%, because I feel so fortunate and lucky that I have this opportunity.

Re: work/ life balance as a mom..

I keep telling myself when DD is in school, I will be mad at myself for stopping my own "life" or career (this is just me though) and it keeps me going....but it sure isn't easy....I want to be w/DD all day

Re: work/ life balance as a mom..

Posted by brownie

I keep telling myself when DD is in school, I will be mad at myself for stopping my own "life" or career (this is just me though) and it keeps me going....but it sure isn't easy....I want to be w/DD all day

Re: work/ life balance as a mom..

It is tough. I am self employed and my mind is never too far from the business. I had one paralegal and now I am bringing on a second but I hate to delegate what I feel that I should be doing! Last week at a Bar Association meeting, we did a "getting to know your colleagues" exercise. Someone described me as "a person who knows how to balance work and family very well." I was surprised to be perceived that way because I don't feel like I have any sort of secret answer to the balance thing. I just take it day by day and some days the balance tips in favor of one thing or another.

Re: work/ life balance as a mom..

It must be in the air tonight...I feel the same way.

Re: work/ life balance as a mom..

Posted by MrsRivera

I am right there with you. I'm a teacher so "technically" I have great hours...in the door at 7, out by 2:40, supposedly...

I had promised myself that work was JUST going to be work this year, since I now have 2 kids. It just doesn't work that way for teachers...either the work and planning gets done after school on MY time, or on my Saturday or Sunday night.

DH and I have ZERO sex life right now. We're both too tired, we're both run ragged.

I feel like my kids are growing up and I'm missing it because I'm putting in 50-hour workweeks.

And people say that teachers have it easy. I'm ready to go apply at a McDonald's somewhere.

Re: work/ life balance as a mom..

I know it's been said before, but I'm a better mother because I work - because I'm not stressed over how the bills are getting paid.

It took a good 6 mos of molding a routine, but once i hit my groove, there was no looking back. Once in a while you get thrown for a loop (like having to run to the ped ER for a few hours on a wednesday night), but just keep your chin up and plow through. Before you know it, it'll be friday!

Re: work/ life balance as a mom..

I was able to stay home with my son for his first year. But we just couldn't afford for me to not be working anymore. My SO works 5 afternoon/evenings a week (well, he is supposed to be, but that is another story) so I HAD to find work to fit around his schedule because daycare or a sitter is just out of the question financially right now.
I ended up getting 2 part time jobs. Each are 3 days a week, and I go to both only one day a week, so I still have two full days off. I work 48 hours each week, but a lot of my hours are when my son is sleeping so I don't miss too much. (One is 5am-1pm and the other is 11pm-7am.) And it's a great opportunity for him to spend some QT with his dad.
I don't know if I'd call it balance because it's pretty chaotic sometimes; but it's been working out so far (sans sleep).
Perhaps see if you can go part time, or maybe adjust your hours to fit better. Would they let you work 7:30-3:30?
Good luck!

Re: work/ life balance as a mom..

I left a job that was probably better for my career in the long run, but that was keeping me away from ds too often. There were many days when I would take him to daycare in the morning and not get home until after he was in bed sleeping at night. Same as you, it started to get to me soon after he turned one. It took about one year of looking and interviewing but I found a lateral position that requires much less time in the office.

I think even if you just start to look, you'll feel better knowing you're making a change. GL!

Re: work/ life balance as a mom..

Re: work/ life balance as a mom..

I'm pretty lucky in that I work 7:30-4pm most nights. We recently took on the mid-west region and we need coverage until 5pm our time. There are three of us who rotate who stays until 5pm. So basically I stay until 5 once to twice a week. Not too bad. Those nights are soup and sandwich, etc.

Re: work/ life balance as a mom..

I'm in the same boat - but cutting down on my hours is impossible. The problem is - I worked hard for my career and I do want it. I did cut back on my extra job (teaching Zumba) - I cut 2 classes from my schedule and I'm a lot happier!!!

Re: work/ life balance as a mom..

since i'm in a time crunch here i have to be short, but just wanted to echo your sentiments...it is beyond difficult being a WM! i am having the SAME feelings as your regarding being away from my DC and working to pay bills etc.
i wish i had advice!

Re: work/ life balance as a mom..

I here ya!! i feel like I live for Friday but waste the rest of the week waiting for it. KWIM?
Then after work it's cooking laundry cleaning up..making bottles.. then maybe play with DS for about an hour before bed.. Just isn't satisfying!!

Re: work/ life balance as a mom..

Posted by speakthetruth

Posted by MrsRivera

I am right there with you. I'm a teacher so "technically" I have great hours...in the door at 7, out by 2:40, supposedly...

I had promised myself that work was JUST going to be work this year, since I now have 2 kids. It just doesn't work that way for teachers...either the work and planning gets done after school on MY time, or on my Saturday or Sunday night.

DH and I have ZERO sex life right now. We're both too tired, we're both run ragged.

I feel like my kids are growing up and I'm missing it because I'm putting in 50-hour workweeks.

And people say that teachers have it easy. I'm ready to go apply at a McDonald's somewhere.

i literally got tears in my eyes reading this.....i know exactly how you feel.....

Re: work/ life balance as a mom..

When I had DS I worked fulltime and went to school fulltime. I was a single mom and needed to make huge sacrifices to give him a good future but I missed out on so much

12 years later I have a career, a house, a husband and an 11 month old. I chose to work 4 days a week and take a pay cut. We don't go out to eat, or on vacations, or have expensive cars or clothing but Its so worth it. Theres no way I can be a SAHM b/c the amount of debt we have but its the next best thing. I have the best of both worlds but its exhausting.

Re: work/ life balance as a mom..

YES!!! My facebook status a few days ago was that i was at a crossroads! My job has suffered because I just don't care as much as I used to, and my boss saw that and I got chewed out. But instead they put me on higher profile projects which has me working much harder and later hours. I left for work yesterday at 7:30 and didn't get home till 8:30! The only good thing is that I work 2 days a week from home, which is why I stay. But I feel like I'm missing my DD's early years - the time that I will have them home with me.

I do like the paycheck although I don't bring in much after we have to pay my nanny but it does pay for the extras like going out to dinner. But am I working for that? I'm so confused and torn and have been pretty miserable. I'm right there with you!

Have you looked for another job? Would you consider staying home for a year or so?