Would you live across the street from family?

What if you found a great house that had 95% of the things you wanted and in your price range BUT it was right across the street from family?

This is a purely hypothetical question! So if it were your parents or IL's would you buy it? What if it were just cousins? Or just an aunt and uncle? What would you do? And hypothetically speaking, you get along great with these people. Would you want to live so close to family? Or would you keep looking for another house?

Discuss...

Message edited 1/13/2008 11:05:47 PM.

Re: Would you live across the street from family?

Right now we are renting an apartment that used to be DH's grandmothers before she passed away ... its down the block from his uncle & about 5 blocks from his parents ... so I guess I probably would.

The rent is good & we *needed* to escape the hell we were previously living in ... so it was a matter of timing too ...

In the future, I would avoid the situation if I could, but if I loved the house I would probably just deal with it.

Re: Would you live across the street from family?

it would depend entirely on the specific family member. My mom, grandma, one of my cousins or my BIL & SIL I'd say yes in a heartbeat.

Re: Would you live across the street from family?

I got overruled on this by my husband. I had thought yes - but only for certain family members that are helpful and respectful. An absolute NO WAY for other family members.

But DH disagreed and brought up a good point (at least for us)... It would never be "our" town. My family is really big on all of us frequenting the same businesses, going to the same places, etc. So that discovery of a new neighborhood would be gone - it would be 'expected' that we would go along with what other people have already decided on.

We are our own people. But we have seen situations where helpfulness has turned into expectation and dissapointment when we choose not to take suggestions or advice.

So the answer is no.

Re: Would you live across the street from family?

Never. Whether I got along great w/ them or not, just too close for me. No family member...I would never consider it even it was just cousins.

Message edited 1/14/2008 8:00:20 AM.

Re: Would you live across the street from family?

Posted by greenfreak

We are our own people. But we have seen situations where helpfulness has turned into expectation and dissapointment when we choose not to take suggestions or advice.

So the answer is no.

Re: Would you live across the street from family?

I guess it depends on which family member... I wouldn't want to live across the street from either set of parents but, maybe a cousin would be ok.

I'd just feel like they were watching us or would try to "help" when we really didn't need help. My MIL doesn't drive either so I would constantly feel lke every time I was thinking of going somewhere, I'd have to ask her along (supermarket, mall, Target, etc).

ETA - We do live in the same town as ILs

Message edited 1/14/2008 8:47:15 AM.

Re: Would you live across the street from family?

We live 2 blocks away from my in-laws and that is as close as I would get. I would feel like they were always spying on me if we lived across the street from each other.

Re: Would you live across the street from family?

Probably not. We found a great house that was around the corner from my ILs. We get along with them really well, but we decided that it would be too close for comfort. There would be too many expectations for us to be available to do stuff with them or for them whenever they saw that we were around, and vice versa. Also, DH did not want to live in the same town where he grew up while all his friends have moved on.

Re: Would you live across the street from family?

If it were the house of my dreams - I think I would have to say I would get it - depending on who lived across the street.

If I got along great with this family - then yes - I think I would.

My cousins house backs up against his mothers house. They have slats in the fence that are out so that they can walk through to get to each other. It's all very "Everybody Loves Raymond" but I know it has worked out great for them (especially having kids now)

Re: Would you live across the street from family?

I don't think I could. When we first looked at homes, we looked at some down the street from my ILs house, and that was too close for comfort and since it was same style homes, I was finding too much wrong with lack of storage, lack of this or that, and I'd hate to carry that over to the family.

So, no, I don't think we could.

Re: Would you live across the street from family?

Yes. My IL's actually bought the house next door to us It's ok though.... no really, I think it's great though and comes in handy when you have kids... Set boundries, if you can.

Re: Would you live across the street from family?

Honestly I don't think I could even if it was my parents. Yes it has it perks when we have a family but at the same time, I would feel that I would be watched constantly. Even though you have privacy in your house, I would feel that everytime I went outside or whatnot, they would be watching. Plus I think there could be some friction especially when they may voice their opinion when you are not asking for it. This is all relative to living in NY though.

My parents bought a house 2 doors down from my brother OOT & it works out great for them. The distance between their houses is a good .5 miles & even though you can see each other's houses, no one interferes with one another. In this situation, I might be inclined to do the same...

Re: Would you live across the street from family?

Absolutely NOT -

And I'm VERY close with my family -
But when they live too close, there's no 'escape' everyone knows everthing, sees everything - then you feel like you're obligated to invited them in or stop over there blah blah - No thanks -

Message edited 1/14/2008 9:55:50 AM.

Re: Would you live across the street from family?

Definite yes for us. We have cousins from DH's side and most of my immediate family right in our town and it's so nice to have everyone close! I get to go to the gym everyday with my sister and we can stop by my nephews football games and my nieces lax games whenever they are playing. We get to go out for a drink or dinner w/ the cousins with no notice...we just make a call and meet in town. We are a close family and for us it works. :)

Re: Would you live across the street from family?

Re: Would you live across the street from family?

I would love to live on the same block...but not directly across the street. Any place where they could see our comings and goings just by looking out their window would get on my nerves.... but being on the same block would be perfect for me

Re: Would you live across the street from family?

Absolutely!!!! I wish my family and DH's family lived across the street or next door to us!

My sister almost moved onto my block, but the deal fell through. My DH and I were bummed about that.

And recently, my DH and I were looking at large properties so we could move and build homes for our parents on it (long term).

My family used to live near a lot of our family members. I had my grandmother, great-grandmother, great aunts and great uncles all living across the street and on either side of us. It was the best!

Re: Would you live across the street from family?

Across the street definitely no but in the same neighborhood sure.

Re: Would you live across the street from family?

I definetely would. I get along great with both my famly and my in laws so I wouldn't mind living across the street from any of them. It would especially be great during the holidays to have family so close.

Message edited 9/21/2009 2:57:54 PM.

Re: Would you live across the street from family?

My inlaws are next door and it's been great. We are here 2 years now.
No problems.
It also helps, because, when they are around (they are "snowbirds), and they are up to it (which they usually always are) I have someone to look after DS.

Re: Would you live across the street from family?

it would totally depend on who it was.
my parents, i would be slightly hesitant but if i loved the house, i would go for it. heck, free dinner whenever we want.
my inlaws - i wouldn't really want to do it.

Re: Would you live across the street from family?

I love them but no way. We leave about 6 blocks away from them now and that is close enough.

Re: Would you live across the street from family?

no.