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LizD
LIF Adolescent
Member since 4/06 763 total posts
Name:
Liz
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Re: Wow, scary stuff
Posted by michele31
I was going to post this as well. But what I think is saddest about this situation is that these people say they "love" this child but it does not read that way to me at all. Now how accepting of her are they really going to be.
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The couple says that they have been forced to raise a child who is “not even the same race, nationality, color ... as they are,” the judge said in the ruling.---------
Wow..that is a pretty powerful thing for a parent to say..."forced" to raise her. I feel very sad for this child.
Michele, I was thinking the same exact thing as you. The statements made do not sound "right" to me. I can understand being upset, but being "forced to raise this child", just sounds so wrong. I guess we look at things differently than others.
My daughter is adopted from China, and does not look like me in the least. I am not being forced to raise her at all, on the contrary, I feel blessed to have been given the privlege (sp) of being able to raise her.
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Posted 3/22/07 2:02 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
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DancinBarefoot
06ers Rock!!
Member since 1/07 9534 total posts
Name:
The One My Mother Gave Me ;-)
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Re: Wow, scary stuff
Posted by melijane
I agree and they should have kept their names private so this poor kid doesn't grow up one day and read about her parents being "forced" to raise her because she was a little darker. Kinda disgusting if you ask me. She is still this womans biological child. Also what about the other side? Does the donor know?
The part about the child not being the same color was astounding. The mother is Dominican - ummm, so am I, and let me tell you, Dominicans come in all colors from white, to black, to every shade of brown in between. It's one thing to get bent out of shape b/c the biological father of the child is not who they thought it to be, but they should stop assuming the color thing is b/c of the father's biology and not the mother's! They shouldn't even be talking about it at all!!!
Edit for spelling.
Message edited 3/22/2007 2:04:28 PM.
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| Posted 3/22/07 2:03 PM |
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Ambersmom
Straight up nasty
Member since 5/05 7740 total posts
Name:
Sharon
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Re: Wow, scary stuff
Posted by melijane
Posted by QuoteTheRaven424
Posted by michele31
I was going to post this as well. But what I think is saddest about this situation is that these people say they "love" this child but it does not read that way to me at all. Now how accepting of her are they really going to be.
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The couple says that they have been forced to raise a child who is “not even the same race, nationality, color ... as they are,” the judge said in the ruling.---------
Wow..that is a pretty powerful thing for a parent to say..."forced" to raise her. I feel very sad for this child.
my thoughts exactly
i fear that the fact that the husband has been proven not to be the father may cause marital problems later, possible resentment
I agree and they should have kept their names private so this poor kid doesn't grow up one day and read about her parents being "forced" to raise her because she was a little darker. Kinda disgusting if you ask me. She is still this womans biological child. Also what about the other side? Does the donor know?
I read it the same way...I can understand them being upset over the mistake but this child is a few years old and from how I take it, they practically resent her existence God, if they have such an issue raising that poor little girl because of her genetic background, there's plenty of people who would love to adopt her To me, it sounds like they are not bonded to her because of her heritage! How could a mother feel that way for her own child???
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| Posted 3/22/07 2:16 PM |
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jellybean78
:)
Member since 8/06 13103 total posts
Name:
Mommy
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Re: Wow, scary stuff
Posted by DancinBarefoot
Posted by melijane
I agree and they should have kept their names private so this poor kid doesn't grow up one day and read about her parents being "forced" to raise her because she was a little darker. Kinda disgusting if you ask me. She is still this womans biological child. Also what about the other side? Does the donor know?
The part about the child not being the same color was astounding. The mother is Dominican - ummm, so am I, and let me tell you, Dominicans come in all colors from white, to black, to every shade of brown in between. It's one thing to get bent out of shape b/c the biological father of the child is not who they thought it to be, but they should stop assuming the color thing is b/c of the father's biology and not the mother's! They shouldn't even be talking about it at all!!!
Edit for spelling.
I was thinking the same thing. How dare they say anything about her color especially that the mother is hispanic. I am Puerto Rican and light skinned but my sister is dark skinned and so is my mom. I understand they are upset about the mix up and they have every right to be but being so blunt and putting your name out there IMO is stupid. Your daughter is eventually going to grow up and read this. Come on people think
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| Posted 3/22/07 2:38 PM |
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Goldi0218
My miracles!
Member since 12/05 23902 total posts
Name:
Leslie
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Re: Wow, scary stuff
Posted by lulugrrl
This is TOTALLY scarey....that poor family. I am SURE they love their daughter, but that must still be so hard.
My second IUI, I had the canister with my hubbys Sperm in it IN MY HAND. Yet...the nurse started preparing with another canister without even thinking!
I was like, UGH...don't ya need THIS one, this is mine. Granted the other canister was empty, and she would have figured it out, but that's just how easily a mistake could be made.
That is some scary stuff. Now every person who used that lab, may be inclined to do DNA testing on themselves and their children.
When DH and I did our inseminations ,DH had the samples under his arm and I saw the doc take it from him. It didnt take, but I knew where it came from. I suppose it will be very hard for anyone using IVF to be trusting. What a shame.
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| Posted 3/22/07 2:49 PM |
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DRMom
Two in Blue
Member since 5/05 20223 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: Wow, scary stuff
Posted by Goldi0218
Posted by lulugrrl
This is TOTALLY scarey....that poor family. I am SURE they love their daughter, but that must still be so hard.
My second IUI, I had the canister with my hubbys Sperm in it IN MY HAND. Yet...the nurse started preparing with another canister without even thinking!
I was like, UGH...don't ya need THIS one, this is mine. Granted the other canister was empty, and she would have figured it out, but that's just how easily a mistake could be made.
That is some scary stuff. Now every person who used that lab, may be inclined to do DNA testing on themselves and their children.
When DH and I did our inseminations ,DH had the samples under his arm and I saw the doc take it from him. It didnt take, but I knew where it came from. I suppose it will be very hard for anyone using IVF to be trusting. What a shame.
I really do think this is the exception and not the rule. My friend had IVF at Columbia and she said it was like the sperm was the President the way they treated and handled it!
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| Posted 3/22/07 2:57 PM |
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jellybean78
:)
Member since 8/06 13103 total posts
Name:
Mommy
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Re: Wow, scary stuff
Posted by melijane
Posted by Goldi0218
Posted by lulugrrl
This is TOTALLY scarey....that poor family. I am SURE they love their daughter, but that must still be so hard.
My second IUI, I had the canister with my hubbys Sperm in it IN MY HAND. Yet...the nurse started preparing with another canister without even thinking!
I was like, UGH...don't ya need THIS one, this is mine. Granted the other canister was empty, and she would have figured it out, but that's just how easily a mistake could be made.
That is some scary stuff. Now every person who used that lab, may be inclined to do DNA testing on themselves and their children.
When DH and I did our inseminations ,DH had the samples under his arm and I saw the doc take it from him. It didnt take, but I knew where it came from. I suppose it will be very hard for anyone using IVF to be trusting. What a shame.
I really do think this is the exception and not the rule. My friend had IVF at Columbia and she said it was like the sperm was the President the way they treated and handled it!
OH God I hope so that's where I had my IVF done!
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| Posted 3/22/07 2:58 PM |
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Goldi0218
My miracles!
Member since 12/05 23902 total posts
Name:
Leslie
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Re: Wow, scary stuff
Posted by melijane
Posted by Goldi0218
Posted by lulugrrl
This is TOTALLY scarey....that poor family. I am SURE they love their daughter, but that must still be so hard.
My second IUI, I had the canister with my hubbys Sperm in it IN MY HAND. Yet...the nurse started preparing with another canister without even thinking!
I was like, UGH...don't ya need THIS one, this is mine. Granted the other canister was empty, and she would have figured it out, but that's just how easily a mistake could be made.
That is some scary stuff. Now every person who used that lab, may be inclined to do DNA testing on themselves and their children.
When DH and I did our inseminations ,DH had the samples under his arm and I saw the doc take it from him. It didnt take, but I knew where it came from. I suppose it will be very hard for anyone using IVF to be trusting. What a shame.
I really do think this is the exception and not the rule. My friend had IVF at Columbia and she said it was like the sperm was the President the way they treated and handled it!
Oh I agree that it is most certainly the exception and not the rule. In fact I was just listening to a radio program where a caller who is going through the IVF process with his wife, actually hired an "escort" to the sperm to make sure nothing happened to it. Then an anonymous embryologist from another center called up and said that these procedures are so tight as far as labeling and protection that the guy who did it must have been drunk or something else to screw this up.
Aside from the many implications from the thoughts of the parents being "forced" to raise this child, whether morally right or wrong, they do deserve compensation. The bottom line is that they went into a physicall/medical and financially draining process under the assumption that they would be creating a family with their own DNA. That's what they paid for and that was their right. That didn't happen.
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| Posted 3/22/07 5:42 PM |
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michele31
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 3372 total posts
Name:
Michele
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Re: Wow, scary stuff
While I do believe that they deserve some form of compensation because of the medical malpractice portion..the whole idea that they are "forced" to raise this child is digusting. The fact that they have had the media get this story and make it FRONT page news all over the state is awful. It shows total disregard for their beautiful child..but I don't think they feel this child is a part of their family at all.
edtted to add: I am raising a son that is from Africa..he is brown and I am not. I honestly can't imagine what these people are thinking. My son is my son. period. The color of his skin is no more important IMO than his eye color.
Message edited 3/22/2007 6:52:28 PM.
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| Posted 3/22/07 6:50 PM |
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LIBOUND
Texting king
Member since 10/05 5289 total posts
Name:
Suzy
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Re: Wow, scary stuff
When I had my first iui, the dr. specifically asked me to look at the name on the tube that held the specimen and to verify if it was dh's name on that tube. I laughed when she did it and say "um...let's see'' being a smart azz. They actually make sure and wait between iui's, I think to make sure that nothing gets mistaken.
But still, anything could happen.
What a nightmare for that family!!!
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| Posted 3/22/07 7:03 PM |
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